Discussion What keeps you in ss (sasu)?

[TwistedNightmares]

It's the only place I find safe to express my thoughts. I find the people here to be really kind and understanding.

 

[memento-mori]

i haven't ctbed yet and i haven't recovered either.

 

[Greyhawk]

This is the only place where I can communicate my thoughts and feelings honestly without pretending. I don't need to fear judgement because people here have experienced same kind of stuff and make an effort to listen. I can talk about suicide, death and my fears without people just going "Suicide is bad" or brushing it off.

In other words, this is the only place where I can feel authentic connection to people. I'm also pretty lonely and I like reading posts and spending time here when I'm bored.

 

[Hiro Uchiha]

freedom and comfort
understanding and respect

 

[corpse]

I don't know why I'm still here.

 

[Forever Sleep]

The sense of community here. The opportunity to be honest about how I'm feeling without getting panic, platitudes or annoyance as a response. I'm stuck here alive while I wait for my Dad to go first. Ironically, the forum is actually helping me to hold on.

 

[Pale_Rider]

SaSu validates my suicidal urges. I need to keep this down irl.

 

[endoftheroad45]

I will eventually ctb. Possibly within the next couple of weeks. My mental health is rapidly declining, this is the only place with like minded people

 

[NutOrat]

Truthfully? External validation. I'm addicted to receiving reactions and replies. But also the community, of course, really nice and smart people here, people who actually try to and do understand me. I barely interact with others irl, so this is the most I've communicated with anyone in a long time. I don't expect to make any long term friends here, because I can't maintain friendships period, and well, the nature of this site, but I like pretending I have all these friends, and that makes getting out of bed feel a little less impossible.

i also fucking HAAAATTTEE reddit. i would frequent r/depression and r/lonely in high school and weirdos would dm me because they thought i was a cute and vulnerable girl when i'm a guy. all online perverts should die. r/depression sucks to browse and the post to comment ratio is kind of crazy compared to sasu. at least people make an effort to talk to each other on here. r/suicidewatch is straight garbo to browse and it's literally just teenagers.

Couldn't have said it better myself. Sorry you had those experiences, they're unfortunately too common. Reddit is usable for anything that doesn't involve politics or any "taboo" topics. So basically, not for many things.

 

[woodlandcreature]

I don't have anything else, and this is the only place I can speak my mind. I can be honest here. I can explain my feelings and not just end it at the "I'm tired" part. While I cannot stand people irl (and generally need quite a substantial amount of alone time daily to decompress), I still find myself getting extremely lonely. It's nice to feel like I have people I can relate to even if we never speak. If I do make it through the year, I don't think I'll make it past Feb/ early April. I can feel myself dying (fast), and I'd like at least some comfort before I go. Most of life is agony anyways (existence is learning what suffering is and can be - suffering can come in many situations and degrees but it's always there which is why we humans have an idea of "good times." can't have good without the bad). I might as well have a few moments of not feeling as alone (though I know I still am) before I go. It's also generally a decent place to get info and statistics. There's misinformation, yeah, but there's also a lot of legit info and conversations about methods which is very helpful.

 

[Spite]

I haven't been here for too long compared to other users here, but I feel like this site is something of a place of refuge for me - somewhere where I can speak what's truly on my mind that I'm not able to tell anyone in my real day-to-day life. This site is where all my suppressed thoughts come out. It feels like the equivalent of journaling my thoughts down freely, no matter how dark or morbid they may be.

Besides, most other websites and forums on the Internet don't even allow you to discuss suicide at all. I know one forum that outright bans anyone who even dares to mention suicide/suicidal thoughts, and that kinda sucks. :/

 

[death over slavery]

SaSu is a great for me since the most far-end spectrum social topic, suicide, is unfiltered in this community. Also, the people here are great unlike other forums and I reckon, even greater than society itself

 

[lunar02102009]

I'm genuinely curious on why so many people stay here for years. It has been for me as well, but I have a problem letting it go even tho in the long run it's not healthy reading too many dark thoughts. I had laughs and good moments, but also bad ones. I felt welcome and abandoned. Many things over the years. What's your opinion or experience?

Because people understand. They support you with your choice even if its death or if its life , and second i am too much of a retard to kill myself SI gets the best of me i have tried to ctb 3 times but of course they didnt work instead got brain damage . This is my only home left

 

[SoulCage]

Many people here describe reality the way I see it: cruel, disgusting... Not really worth it. I read it and no longer feel crazy/stupid for believing something that doesn't align with what mental health "experts" say.
It's soothing.. somehow. Comforting.

Talking about my pain irl is always exhausting, because nobody seems to care or understand - also because I am really bad with bringing my chaotic mind to words (writing works better for me). Here, it just works. No toxic positivity, no platitudes, no gaslighting.

 

[FadingSnowFake]

Still here cause I'm still alive and still suicidal.

 

[TheMountainTreeEgg]

Yeah I agree with you, It's probably not best that to stay here, but being in a place where everyones situation is the same allows me to let go and release some of my bottled up feelings. I've been thinking of CTB since middle school, and although I've never been really close to actually doing it, recently (last year) it was even stronger than before. but im getting off topic. overall the community that I can relate with and release my feelings.

 

[AltF4Mylife]

I can relate to other people in here.

 

[Holu]

I'm not the oldest member by any means, but tbh a lot of us don't last. I've seen a lot of good people here go, and it sucks beyond anything.

Normally I relapse and come back here whenever I feel like shit. It's more a force of habit than anything at this point. Even still, it's a good place to be when you are in a bad place, if that makes sense.

 

[Johnhawk_Down]

Really seems to be the only safe haven where you can discuss suicide, regardless of whether you want to "catch the bus" or are in recovery. That's a misconception about this site that judgemental people and establishments ought to know, that's this site is also about recovery, not just for ideation and following through with the act itself. This site offers you the freedom to go down either path without feeling alone, since this topic is taboo this is often the case. And what's said in here is from the heart, it's raw, you could to therapy and say to the therapist: let's talk suicide, the therapist is like: are you okay? Do you feel the urge to harm yourself? No, I just said I want to talk about suicide. You can't even talk to an AI about it, they too safeguards. But anyway, why keep coming here, all of the above.

 

[death or death]

SaSu is really one of the only places that suicide can be discussed without judgment or being told it'll get better soon.

 

[Nadienobody]

I always return here when I feel like shit, it's the only place that's remotely relatable and the idea of suicide gives me comfort. At this point I think it's just a matter of time before I ctb, even when I'm currently trying to recover.

 

[SparkleWater]

Kinda the same thing as most other people in this thread. I feel like if o were to talk to ANYONEA in my life about my suicidal thoughts i get instant pushback of "dont do ot because xyz" like yea no shit how many other people do you think told me those exact thing. They instantly see you as a danger to yourself (which i kinda am im not gonna fucking lie why else would i be on this damn site) and it sucks. No room for discussion, no room to hear me out. The moment ai say those words the alarms go off for them and nothing else matters.

I'm so used to these thoughts, they've become second nature to me at this point and nobody here is TRYING to convince me to live. Nobody trying to tell me to live. Nobody telling me my trauma is invalid because "your mom and dad still loved you" like thats any excuse for the stuff I missed because she was selfish or overprotective.

I feel like I actually have a choice when I come here.

And normally while i do lurk here more than I post I feel like people here actually understand me. Even if most of us got here through different circumstances and traumas. Because in the end, alot of us are just done.

 

[Cauliflour]

If I confessed my constant masochistic thoughts to anywhere else then I'd have my reputation tanked and people mocking me and calling me a freak.

 

[ZornTheDreaded]

Have nowhere else to go, But at least you won't put me in a mental hospital.

this

 

[ToTheEgress]

I tend to have a windfall and end up in a better situation after a while, aborting my plans. I was just a bit depressed while being in college by the time I joined. Now I'm out and I'm back since I feel like shit about my current situation.

 

[ICantFixThis]

I've been in and out of the dark place for probably more than 10 years now, I'm here because it feels less lonely seeing others going through a similar situation. I want to get better but it feels usually feels hopeless. Y'all understand :)

 

[unluckysadness]

This is the only place where people are speaking honestly without wearing a mask. No fakes here. It's the only place I can say "I have a miserable life" without feeling judged.
A suicide forum that keeps most people alive. Isn't it ironic ? Thanks again to SaSu creators

 

[Mr. Snrub]