Over the past year, increased regulatory pressure in multiple regions like UK OFCOM and Australia's eSafety has led to higher operational costs, including infrastructure, security, and the need to work with more specialized service providers to keep the site online and stable.
If you value the community and would like to help support its continued operation, donations are greatly appreciated. If you wish to donate via Bank Transfer or other options, please open a ticket.
Donate via cryptocurrency:
Bitcoin (BTC):
Ethereum (ETH):
Monero (XMR):
What are the last things you plan to do before you die?
Thread starteramor.dor
Start date
You are using an out of date browser. It may not display this or other websites correctly. You should upgrade or use an alternative browser.
What are the last things you plan to do before you die? Those things you feel would make you feel better and at peace—whether they're very complex or simpler things, like reading a book, traveling, or anything else.
Try to find some way to relax. I don't want to spend my last moments anxious or scared. I want to feel like I'm falling asleep, or at the very least feel at peace before I go.
Reactions:
coolliontigerragged, pthnrdnojvsc, itsgone2 and 1 other person
maybe its sort of silly but i want to try hard drugs ! i dont know much about them but i've stayed away from anything aside from, like, my prescribed dose adhd meds. i figure i already struggle so much with getting the happy chemicals that i dont wanna mess with that process in my brain while im alive.
but i think it would be nice to experience unearthly euphoria.. like every signal running through my brain surging and sparking into pure happiness, a fireworks show to celebrate a final, peaceful end.
although, thinking about it is kind of sad in the way of it being sort of impersonal, like my last moments aren't really spent with a sober & grounded "me." in contrast, i might also just sit alone in the quietest space i can find, hehe.
Reactions:
vorteksrbija, killdozer, negi-maguro and 3 others
Anything that doesn't involve making CTB easier and more likely to happen is pointless. Any pleasure gained from doing somethings g I like will be short-lived and may even decrease the odds that I do it.
Reactions:
pthnrdnojvsc, night9, negi-maguro and 3 others
I've been listening to the song Goner a lot, it's a good one from them
Awe low key stuff, watch certain movies again, eat certain foods I want to, watch another sunset, put my toes in the sand (at a local small beach), stuff like that. Nothing big, I have no big desires anymore like traveling and such. I feel I've done enough but just want to be at peace before I go
maybe its sort of silly but i want to try hard drugs ! i dont know much about them but i've stayed away from anything aside from, like, my prescribed dose adhd meds. i figure i already struggle so much with getting the happy chemicals that i dont wanna mess with that process in my brain while im alive.
but i think it would be nice to experience unearthly euphoria.. like every signal running through my brain surging and sparking into pure happiness, a fireworks show to celebrate a final, peaceful end.
although, thinking about it is kind of sad in the way of it being sort of impersonal, like my last moments aren't really spent with a sober & grounded "me." in contrast, i might also just sit alone in the quietest space i can find, hehe.
They are really good - just listened to that one for some reason haven't heard it before! Goner was just in a book I read dealing with suicide (Together We Will Go) so I had it on repeat but I like their music!
Anything that doesn't involve making CTB easier and more likely to happen is pointless. Any pleasure gained from doing somethings g I like will be short-lived and may even decrease the odds that I do it.
I just want to be gone, that is all, I just want permanent peace from this torturous, dreadful and cruel existence that just causes all this terrible, dreadful harm and suffering, existence is a mistake to me that I'd prefer to erase no matter what.
I just want all to be finally gone and forgotten for me in the peace of non-existence, for me every second is torture to suffer in this existence, I'd just never wish for the cruel, dreadful abomination of existence and this existence just never should had been imposed at all, for me non-existence is just all that's positive.
Reactions:
amor.dor, doomedbynarrative and negi-maguro
What are the last things you plan to do before you die? Those things you feel would make you feel better and at peace—whether they're very complex or simpler things, like reading a book, traveling, or anything else.
get the videos of my friends from my cassettes off and onto a file to send to them, prepare to things to give to my close friends that i think they would like write and personalized letter to each of them, then a letter to my parents telling them how they fucked me up, a letter to my other friends, then die.
What are the last things you plan to do before you die? Those things you feel would make you feel better and at peace—whether they're very complex or simpler things, like reading a book, traveling, or anything else.
I want to take a bunch of edibles. I use weed to dampen my BPD right now. I love the way it makes me feel, it definitely lifts the burden of all my mentally ill shit but it 100% doesn't cure me so I know it wouldn't impact my desire to ctb.
That is always there, but as least I can be happy about it. Eat my steak, watch some youtube, eventually come to - do it.
Psychedelics and/or dissociatives one last time.
I think I'd like to go camping somewhere where there's no light pollution and I can see the stars.
For the moments right before, I'd probably get drunk and dance to certain songs I have picked out specifically for this purpose. I would inevitably drunk text cryptic messages to people I know at this point, but hopefully I would retain the executive functioning to do it by email on a delay.
I would like to hug someone too. Doesn't really matter who.
I guess nothing in my daily routine will change. As always I will browse some web, maybe get in touch with my friends. Probably will do anything that will let me relax.
I still want to finish and publish a sci-fi story I'm writing as a note. If possible, I want to arrange myself to be cremated, but it seems impossible in my country. Honestly, just waiting for a moment where I stop caring both of those things and just ctb. I'm not good with plans, mine should come impulsively.
Reactions:
amor.dor, Bitch With An Apple and kuroshimi
I would probably make myself a huge feast - then destroy everything I have - literally demolish my whole flat - throw last money I have away - quit my job - try to make all my friends hate me - and prepare to actually CTB
This site uses cookies to help personalise content, tailor your experience and to keep you logged in if you register.
By continuing to use this site, you are consenting to our use of cookies.