Discussion Should there be an age limit for CTB?

[allym101]

Is there an age where you think it's too young? I've known a couple people in my life who honestly (as horrible as it sounds) probably would've been happier if they attempted earlier rather than waiting for adulthood.

 

[StringPuppet]

How would it be enforced

 

[Apathy79]

It depends on circumstances. The old adage about suicide being a permanent solution to a temporary problem is far more likely to apply to suicidal teenagers than suicidal pensioners, but there's more to it than age alone.

 

[allym101]

How would it be enforced

It wouldn't. I'm just looking for personal opinions. Also I love your profile picture, Martyrs, right?

It depends on circumstances. The old adage about suicide being a permanent solution to a temporary problem is far more likely to apply to suicidal teenagers than suicidal pensioners, but there's more to it than age alone.

I agree. Of course, I think that a girl in grade 7 wanting to kill herself because her boyfriend broke up with her is ridiculous but I'm talking more about abusive homes, trauma, or just being ugly in appearance. It's a fact that prettier people get it easier in life. I feel like someone shouldn't have to endure that pain all their life.

 

[StringPuppet]

Also I love your profile picture, Martyrs, right?

Yep. Love yours too btw

 

[everydayiloveyou]

Around 24-ish. I think that's around the age the brain stops developing. Also, most people will have gone through plenty of life experience by that point (school, uni, work life, etc) which can rule out most circumstantial stuff.

Lots of people who seem to have irrepairably horrible lives are going through very circumstantial issues. There are lots of kids who feel suicidal while in high school due to a toxic home life or school bullying, move away for college, and then feel happier about their lives and are no longer suicidal. Some people don't start to thrive until they enter the workforce as full-time workers.

I've been suicidal for a long time. I'm glad I didn't ctb earlier, because I seriously wasn't being rational when I first started having these feelings. And I've since had lots of happy times. I still plan to ctb eventually, but I know I am making this decision from a more logical place of mind now.

also, as for the ugliness thing, that's actually one of the main reasons I wanted to ctb when I was young. Now that I'm an adult and have control over what I eat, wear, put on my face, etc, I realized that looks are really not everything. Usually a lot of the issues that people attribute to "being ugly" are actually more reflective of mental illness stigma. Depressed, anxious, generally unstable people just don't give good vibes, and that can make it very difficult to connect with others, especially if your symptoms include lack of self-awareness or lack of hygiene. But just having a funny face isn't a one-way ticket to being a homeless bum. Similarly, being gorgeus doesn't keep you from having a unpleasant and tumultuous life.

 

[summers]

I thought you meant an upper age limit along the lines of Logan's Run, like you have to ctb by a certain age, or the government will do it for you.

 

[Life_and_Death]

It's a fact that prettier people get it easier in life.

How is this fact?

 

[I screwed up]

We have a lot of teenagers commit ctb in my country with each having their own legit reasons maybe... Don't know if having a lower age limit makes sense .. As it is there is a school of thought that says ctb at any age is wrong.

 

[Buffy5120]

Is there an age where you think it's too young? I've known a couple people in my life who honestly (as horrible as it sounds) probably would've been happier if they attempted earlier rather than waiting for adulthood.

No

 

[watereyes]

Idk. I have attempted earlier for things that do not bother me now (like loneliness, not being good enough..), but in the end if I ended it earlier I wouldn't be living this stupid and meaningless life now.

 

[Amumu]

Of course yes. Except from children suffering from terminal illnesses, even people who attempted before 18 here will tell you the age limit should be 12 or something like that.
Then most people here will tell you the age limit should be at least 18, or older for a lot of people, including myself.

I'm not really convinced by the argument of "brain development", though. Of course a 18-year old is often much more impulsive than a 25-year old, but that's it.

It's a fact that prettier people get it easier in life.

It's very true in most circumstances, but for a minority of good-looking people, I've discovered it could be a burden, because good-looking women are more likely to be raped, to suffer from jealousy, and eventually to be rejected. For a majority of good-looking people, beauty is a paramount boon, though.

I agree. Of course, I think that a girl in grade 7 wanting to kill herself because her boyfriend broke up with her is ridiculous .

Oh no it's not ridiculous. If you want to ctb because of a breakup, you often have underlying mental health problems, in my opinion.

 

[262653]

Should there be an age limit for CTB?

I think there should be when it suits me, and if it doesn't suit me, then it shouldn't be.

 

[AbsoluteNothingness]

Definitely no. Why there "should" be an "age limit" to die? There isn't any 'age limit' to live/exist so there shouldn't be any age limit to die. I didnt ask to exist/be 'born'/be 'brought' anywhere at all so why there has to even be an "age limit" to not want to exist? Existing shouldn't be obligatory and everyone regardless their "age" (or whatever the fuck "age" means lol) should have the right to die if that's what they simply want ((my case, Im not suffering at all about anything but anyways I simply just dont want to exist/'experience' 'life' nor any other thing at all no matter what/how it is. And I dont say this bEcAuSe i dOnT hAvE aNy rEaSoN tO lIvE or bEcAuSe EvErYtHiNg iS mEaNInGlEsS, no it's not because of any of those. I just don't want to have any "reason to live" lol, it's not that I dont have but i want to, I could perfectly have one if that's what i wanted but i just dont give a damn shit lol. And it's also not because everything/'life' is "meaningless" or whatever "meaningless"/"meaningful" means lmao, I dont give a fuck if 'life'/'existence' and whatever/any other thing is "meaningful" or "meaningless" or whatever. It's not because of any reason. I just dont. The only things that are holding me back [the only reasons I havent ctb yet] are the fact that i simply just dont have any way out and because 'my parents'/'my family' would be devastated/sad and would suffer a lot, so thats why it's a hard decision for me but I will ctb someday anyways, I wont stay just because they 'brought' 'me' 'here' and want me to 'enjoy life'/'experience life'/'live life'/'explore the world' and blah blah and just because they would suffer and cry if i die. I never asked to be 'born' and if i simply just dont give a shit about anything/have no "interest" about/for/in anything at all no matter what/how it is [and don't want to, just dont, dont ask why because there simply isn't any reason at all, whether you believe it or not and please no assumptions] and I simply just dont want to 'live'/'experience'/'do'/'enjoy'/'know'/'learn from'/'participate in'/'be part of' 'life'/'existence'/'the world'/'planet earth' nor any other thing no matter what/how it is so Im sorry to 'my parents'/'my family' but if i dont want to I dont want to and I wont stay alive/exist and 'experience' 'life' just to not make them suffer and just because 'my parents' 'brought' 'me' 'here'. Again, this shouldn't be an obligation.)) or they're suffering and cant stand the pain anymore. 'I' 'became' 'something'/'someone' and was 'brought' to 'existence' and whatever all 'this' 'is' against my will/forcedly and without my consent, it was the choice of 'others', not 'mine'. So if 'I' never asked to be 'born' nor be anything at all nor be 'brought' anywhere why there has to be an "age limit" to die? 'I' 'came' 'here'/was 'brought' 'here' [i dont want to be 'brought' anywhere lol] against my will, so 'I' should be able to leave whenever 'I' want. There shouldnt be any age limit, there's nothing wrong with wanting to die/not wanting to live, (in my case it's not because of any 'reason') dying/not existing should be a right just like living/existing is.

 

[Rn110bg101]

I wish I had CTB'd when I was a child, then I could have avoided everything that came afterwards.

There is no age limit for suffering, why should there be one to make it stop?

 

[sadworld]

I see many users on here saying they wish they ctb'd earlier but I also know users who attempted, survived but chose to recover afterwards. It's hard to say if there should be an age limit but I personally would say it completely depends on the person.

 

[yive]

age means nothing. it depends on the inner state of the person. if a person believes that he needs it, then he is ready.

moreover, I believe that early death cannot be a mistake.
I am of the opinion that it is better to die as soon as possible (promortalism)

Those who died young are the happiest of people.

 

[Deformationalplagio]

Around 24-ish. I think that's around the age the brain stops developing. Also, most people will have gone through plenty of life experience by that point (school, uni, work life, etc) which can rule out most circumstantial stuff.

Lots of people who seem to have irrepairably horrible lives are going through very circumstantial issues. There are lots of kids who feel suicidal while in high school due to a toxic home life or school bullying, move away for college, and then feel happier about their lives and are no longer suicidal. Some people don't start to thrive until they enter the workforce as full-time workers.

I've been suicidal for a long time. I'm glad I didn't ctb earlier, because I seriously wasn't being rational when I first started having these feelings. And I've since had lots of happy times. I still plan to ctb eventually, but I know I am making this decision from a more logical place of mind now.

also, as for the ugliness thing, that's actually one of the main reasons I wanted to ctb when I was young. Now that I'm an adult and have control over what I eat, wear, put on my face, etc, I realized that looks are really not everything. Usually a lot of the issues that people attribute to "being ugly" are actually more reflective of mental illness stigma. Depressed, anxious, generally unstable people just don't give good vibes, and that can make it very difficult to connect with others, especially if your symptoms include lack of self-awareness or lack of hygiene. But just having a funny face isn't a one-way ticket to being a homeless bum. Similarly, being gorgeus doesn't keep you from having a unpleasant and tumultuous life.

Im deformed (badly) believe me having a funny face is worse then having cancer and i dont think they should et deformed people live when they are young. 95% of people with my condition suicide. So no 24 years of torment is a bit to much.

 

[262653]

I know it's not exactly on topic, but I want to express a few thoughts that I think are quite related.

Say, I'm 40 year old. On this forum I get to know about 20 year old person who plans to suicide this year. I have this feeling I'm not sure how to explain, but I feel really bad knowing that such young people are planning to off themselves, and I feel bad for not doing anything to make that person less likely to follow up through their plans.

So I'm deciding to do something about it. What should I say to 20 year old person? I probably wouldn't go with: "Hey, 20 year old person, I have this feeling that propels me to say something that in my view would reduce the likelihood of you following through your suicide plans. <Here goes the convincing part.>" Why? Well, the part where I'm explaining why I think I'm trying to convince you in the first place betrays the impression that I'm doing this for my own good, and I can only see this decreasing the convincing power of my message (which goes against my goal), so why not just ditch this part altogether, and leave the convincing part?

And convincing part can be something like: the brain of human being isn't fully formed until 24-26; you're so young and have so much ahead of you; think about how your parents will feel; whatever. Just read the posts about young ppl CTB, there are plenty of arguments. It could be an appeal to shame/guilt. It could be something resembling a sound argument that would make the choice to postpone CTB look more beneficial for that young person. But whatever the strategy is (whatever the arguments are), my goal here appears to be the same: to satisfy personal feelings which currently demand from me to try to convince that young person not to CTB.

 

[Amumu]

age means nothing. it depends on the inner state of the person. if a person believes that he needs it, then he is ready.

moreover, I believe that early death cannot be a mistake.
I am of the opinion that it is better to die as soon as possible (promortalism)

I wouldn't recommend you to look after kids lol ^^ (j/k)

 

[allym101]

How is this fact?

Just google pretty privilege. Multiple studies have been done. People are more likely to trust attractive people, pretty people are more likely to find a significant other, make friends, etc.

Oh no it's not ridiculous. If you want to ctb because of a breakup, you often have underlying mental health problems, in my opinion.

One of my friends in grade 7 wanted to kill herself after her breakup just to spite her ex and make his life miserable. I think that her thought process was incredibly selfish and she didn't want to die because she was necessarily suicidal, she wanted to die just to make someone else's life a living hell. That's more what I'm referring to. Besides, at that age I don't think a child really understands the difference between love and lust so you should never hold someone to high of a standard.

 

[Sinkinshyp]

In all honesty as a 49 yr old mom it's a tough subject for me to answer. I tried to ctb as a teenager and I am glad I failed. I am pro choice- given that decision everyone has a right to decide if they have had enough or if they want to keep trying to see if things will change. I tried to ctb over some really stupid things one was a bf. I think people should exhaust therapy, medications other options before they CTB. I honestly think younger people should wait until they are older. Hormones, brain development and circumstances change. I grew up in a very abusive home, my father my abuser died when I was 15 and about 6 months later I met a bf more evil than my father. I was horrible picked on in elementary school. I have been through A TON of crap. I can say age did help me not be so emotionally unstable. I have always had bad anxiety, depression has always been there- but being older I learned to mostly keep it in control one reason I became a single mom at 20. I was all my son had and I guess the love, happiness and pure joy of being mom overpowered the depression most of the time.

I must chime in here @allym101 " Just google pretty privilege. Multiple studies have been done. People are more likely to trust attractive people, pretty people are more likely to find a significant other, make friends, etc." I have always been above average in appearance. In my younger years I would have 2 or 3 guys waiting on me to become single. No being attractive does NOT bring you a significant other- who loves you and treats you well. I have been physically and mentally abused, used and by choice except 8 months single for 10 years. I tend to choose the wrong guys and decided I had enough of being used and abused. No it doesn't bring friends either. Being a single mom & my anxiety I kept my social circle very small. When my son died the 3 friends I had vanished. 1 was my ex sister in law (brothers ex wife) I was no longer the person she knew and she backed out of my life. The 2nd friend I was asked by a buddy ohh about 13 yrs ago to take her in she was in an abusive relationship and had to get away. I took her in not once but 3x. She says I took a total stranger into my home and saved her life- yet in the last 3 years my son has been dead she does not call to say Hi how are you holding up? I guess financially since I stay home depressed I have nothing to offer her. The 3rd was an ex bf. He needed me to carry car insurance on his work van because he had dui's. He stuck around here and there so I kept his van insured. Once he met a new gf and got the van out of my name he doesnt talk to me. Looks do not bring you ANYTHING. People are so focused on looks. Sure, if I go to the bar and get drunk I have 4 or 5 guys hit on me-but ya know what? I learned they just want to get laid. I do not date guys via their looks, toys or finances- I want someone who will love me and treat me as good as I treat him. I am 49 single because I have been abused and used up. People here say "I'm ugly" well whose idea are you using to decide that? Ugly is someone who isn't nice, who is out for themselves, who doesn't care who they hurt just to get what they want. Ugly is someone whose evil on the inside.

 

[Amumu]

One of my friends in grade 7 wanted to kill herself after her breakup just to spite her ex and make his life miserable. I think that her thought process was incredibly selfish and she didn't want to die because she was necessarily suicidal, she wanted to die just to make someone else's life a living hell. That's more what I'm referring to. Besides, at that age I don't think a child really understands the difference between love and lust so you should never hold someone to high of a standard.

Oh, I see. But if she wanted to do that, she probably had psychological problems as well. That was clearly sadistic, though.

People here say "I'm ugly"

Well, obviously, it seems that looks bring about suicidal thoughts for a lot of people, I assume.
They do it for me.

 

[Life_and_Death]

Just google pretty privilege. Multiple studies have been done. People are more likely to trust attractive people, pretty people are more likely to find a significant other, make friends, etc.

"more likely" that doesnt make them "privileged". like someone already said being pretty isnt always a good thing. as someone thats not to bad themselves i can personally say that i wish i was a guy. i fucking hate how i cant even go out without being treated like everyones eye candy the only thing being pretty gets you is zero respect and if you think not being respected is "privileged" then wow

 

[Ghost2211]

I don't think there should be any minimum age to suicide but rather it should be based on circumstances. There are plenty of situations where a very young children are suffering horrendous conditions both physical and psychological that will never change because of the circumstances they were born into. Who am I to tell them that they are too young to relieve themselves of the suffering that there is no freedom from until they reach a certain age?

 

[allym101]

"more likely" that doesnt make them "privileged". like someone already said being pretty isnt always a good thing. as someone thats not to bad themselves i can personally say that i wish i was a guy. i fucking hate how i cant even go out without being treated like everyones eye candy the only thing being pretty gets you is zero respect and if you think not being respected is "privileged" then wow

I'm talking from first hand experience. I'm sorry if I hit a nerve somewhere but this is what I've witnessed from all my years on this planet. I wish I could complain about being pretty, and if you think ugly people get any respect, news flash, we don't! Especially not ugly woman. In a world where everyone is so focused on appearance, I've found that males have an easier time being unattractive yet still being successful. As a woman though, if at the bareminium your looks aren't average, you're screwed. I used to be really good looking. I had great skin, an amazing body, guys loved me, I had more friends, I got more job offers, strangers were nicer to me, and way more. Life is easier when you're attractive so don't try to act like it's some huge burden. Ugly people get raped as well, rapists don't give a shit what you look like. They're disgusting people and if they're really desperate they'll go for anyone. You know what hurts? Sitting on the public transport and hearing teenage girls gossip behind you about how ugly you are and then giggling when you turn around to look at them. When I put effort into my appearance, life is easier. It's better. Being pretty is a gift, not a burden so please. It's almost insulting to those of us who weren't born with natural beauty.

 

[Life_and_Death]

I'm talking from first hand experience. I'm sorry if I hit a nerve somewhere but this is what I've witnessed from all my years on this planet. I wish I could complain about being pretty, and if you think ugly people get any respect, news flash, we don't! Especially not ugly woman. In a world where everyone is so focused on appearance, I've found that males have an easier time being unattractive yet still being successful. As a woman though, if at the bareminium your looks aren't average, you're screwed. I used to be really good looking. I had great skin, an amazing body, guys loved me, I had more friends, I got more job offers, strangers were nicer to me, and way more. Life is easier when you're attractive so don't try to act like it's some huge burden. Ugly people get raped as well, rapists don't give a shit what you look like. They're disgusting people and if they're really desperate they'll go for anyone. You know what hurts? Sitting on the public transport and hearing teenage girls gossip behind you about how ugly you are and then giggling when you turn around to look at them. When I put effort into my appearance, life is easier. It's better. Being pretty is a gift, not a burden so please. It's almost insulting to those of us who weren't born with natural beauty.

i never said you did. what i am saying is just because someone is something doesnt mean you can stereotype them as being "privileged" because EVERYTHING comes with its own problems

 

[TheEndisNear121200]

This is a tough question to answer, I'm 21 and don't see my situation ever changing because I deal with a never ending trauma that's impossible to heal from , I don't see why I should wait until 24 or older since it's the same thing.
But I do undertsand those that say that young people should exhaust all the medication and therapy options they have before CTB because young people are more inclined to act on impulse and there are many circumstances that can be overcome with age.
So overall I think it depends on the person

 

[allym101]

i never said you did. what i am saying is just because someone is something doesnt mean you can stereotype them as being "privileged" because EVERYTHING comes with its own problems

This isn't a stereotype, it's a fact. Attractive people get it easier in life. I don't care if you disagree with me. If you're someone who grew up as attractive, I don't expect you to understand what this struggle feels like. I get that being pretty has it's problems, but I don't think they're as bad you as you pin them to be.

 

[Life_and_Death]

but I don't think they're as bad you as you pin them to be.

yeah, cuz being raped isnt bad. its just a thing. whatever