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SeraphimNull

SeraphimNull

Member
Oct 5, 2025
5
Hi all,

I feel lost. I'm not sure how to explain it, like I'm caught between living and dying; I don't really want to do either. I kind of just want to exist inanimately. I enjoy the pleasures of living, but I don't even know if they're worth it compared to the suffering that life inevitably gives. I want to be better, I want to enjoy my life. Has anyone here overcome feelings like this? Any input is welcome, thanks :)
 
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TBONTB

Paragon
May 31, 2025
951
Well, I feel like someone is going to come along and say something much wiser than me.

I'm glad you enjoy the pleasures of living. keep focusing on those. I don't think there's a lot of value in thinking about the big picture, the meaning, the suffering. There will be some, that's how life is.

So...one day at a time?
 
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certainty

Member
Sep 5, 2025
8
unfortunately i don't have anything wiser to offer, but i can commiserate with you. the "in-between" is an incredibly lonely and confusing place to be. i'm "sane" enough to appreciate aspects of life but still not want it, and fear death nonetheless. i think even just wanting to get better is hope, though. assuming you've already done the basics (therapy, meds, journaling, etc.), have you considered philosophy or religion? i haven't found any answers but i've seen ancedotally how "purpose" can help others.
 
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SeraphimNull

SeraphimNull

Member
Oct 5, 2025
5
unfortunately i don't have anything wiser to offer, but i can commiserate with you. the "in-between" is an incredibly lonely and confusing place to be. i'm "sane" enough to appreciate aspects of life but still not want it, and fear death nonetheless. i think even just wanting to get better is hope, though. assuming you've already done the basics (therapy, meds, journaling, etc.), have you considered philosophy or religion? i haven't found any answers but i've seen ancedotally how "purpose" can help others.
I do some journaling and some artistic output, but it's not "enough" if that makes sense. I've read some philosophy on it, but all it does is help you understand how/why you feel the way you do (for me at least), not actually solve anything. I would love to find a purpose, a reason to deal with the bad and appreciate the good. But as it stands now, I kind of exist to do only that unfortunately.
 
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certainty

Member
Sep 5, 2025
8
I do some journaling and some artistic output, but it's not "enough" if that makes sense. I've read some philosophy on it, but all it does is help you understand how/why you feel the way you do (for me at least), not actually solve anything. I would love to find a purpose, a reason to deal with the bad and appreciate the good. But as it stands now, I kind of exist to do only that unfortunately.
man, even more relatable somehow. i tend to think existing to search for a purpose is just as good as any reason, as long as life isn't entirely unbearable. i hope (for both our sakes) that there is ultimately something worth clinging onto <3 for now, the search is purpose enough for me.
 
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SeraphimNull

SeraphimNull

Member
Oct 5, 2025
5
man, even more relatable somehow. i tend to think existing to search for a purpose is just as good as any reason, as long as life isn't entirely unbearable. i hope (for both our sakes) that there is ultimately something worth clinging onto <3 for now, the search is purpose enough for me.
Thank you for your input my friend. Likewise, I hope we both find what were looking for. <3
 
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