• Hey Guest,

    We wanted to share a quick update with the community.

    Our public expense ledger is now live, allowing anyone to see how donations are used to support the ongoing operation of the site.

    👉 View the ledger here

    Over the past year, increased regulatory pressure in multiple regions like UK OFCOM and Australia's eSafety has led to higher operational costs, including infrastructure, security, and the need to work with more specialized service providers to keep the site online and stable.

    If you value the community and would like to help support its continued operation, donations are greatly appreciated. If you wish to donate via Bank Transfer or other options, please open a ticket.

    Donate via cryptocurrency:

    Bitcoin (BTC):
    Ethereum (ETH):
    Monero (XMR):
O

OperationOblivion

Member
Nov 27, 2025
11
All I do is hurt other people. I've recently told some of my very close friends and family that I'm suicidal and hurting myself. For a time I was better, but I want to die again and I feel even worse as a result. I want to die but I worry that it'll only hurt them even more. I don't know what'd be worse, me hurting them unconsciously while I'm alive, or making the choice to kill myself and ruin traumatize them.
 
Last edited:
  • Hugs
  • Love
Reactions: Oreki, OnMyLast Legs, NutOrat and 1 other person
failedmind

failedmind

lonely
Oct 31, 2024
189
You're not a bad person, you're in pain. Your last sentence speaks to me a lot. I have been planning to CTB for over 10 years, but the guilt of hurting my family has held me back. But I also know staying alive as the depressed suicidal family member hurts them too. Its a battle. But no, you're not a bad person for wanting to kill yourself. You're hurting, and I'm sorry that you are
 
  • Hugs
  • Love
  • Like
Reactions: Oreki, OperationOblivion, OnMyLast Legs and 2 others
O

OperationOblivion

Member
Nov 27, 2025
11
Since my initial post I've thought more about living vs dying and I'm leaning more and more towards death. Recently I was diagnosed with major depression and I'm completely drowning in school work. I can't motivate myself at all anymore and am just becoming useless to myself and the people around me. I've been considering trying the night night method but I'm still weighing my options.
 
X

X-sanguinate86

Specialist
Sep 26, 2025
349
In a world like the one we are currently in you'd be a bad person for not wanting to.
 
  • Like
  • Love
Reactions: badatparties and pthnrdnojvsc
fromange

fromange

riding the wave °‧ 𓆝 𓆟 𓆞 ·。
Oct 29, 2025
103
I'm learning about self compassion. Here's a video to consider.
 

Similar threads

Hellis
Replies
18
Views
813
Suicide Discussion
itsallogrenow
itsallogrenow
yuri77
Replies
14
Views
333
Suicide Discussion
Nolongerlive
N
ohsosleepy
Replies
1
Views
131
Suicide Discussion
NihilusVan
N
H
Replies
13
Views
445
Suicide Discussion
human123
H
lorem_ipsum
Replies
4
Views
320
Suicide Discussion
lorem_ipsum
lorem_ipsum