Your reasons to live

[LilGhost]

What's your reasons to live? I was searching for a reason from the young age, but I feel like nothing i find is good enough to shut up my ctb thoughts or to unachievable.
It used to be changing the world for better, for some time. I was (still when possible) part of protests/rallies, helping communists, do donations, will probably try to volunteer where possible and get accepted, trying to make the world a bit more peaceful, but I feel like nothing I do is good enough. World is still shit and my efforts do nothing. I'm also very limited in my actions with government for various reasons. And I am tired. Also, my used to be friend who was creating an anarchist society for my college with me, hurt me badly and even tried to delete me from our work, so I feel like I'm choking whenever I want to do anything good for the campus, as I know there is high chances I'll stumble upon him as he is very active in these spaces and have no understanding of business and personal relationships and might actually do smth bad (I'm avoiding him, I fear if I ever see him again, I'll just start hyperventilating and maybe even cry like pathetic little bi tch I am)
So…. I need another reason to live…. What are yall reasons to live?

 

[exhaustedgolfcat]

i don't want my cats to be confused and sad and then eat my skin off because they're starving
i don't want my mom to think she could have helped, just failed

 

[Praestat_Mori]

I became suicidal bc of a big failure in life and when I hit rock bottom I was so close to killing myself bc this life wasn't worth living anymore. My personal situation stabilized on a low level and I receive the support I need from closest family. Life is worth living again for now bc my situation didn't become worse and I enjoy doing stuff again.

 

[unluckysadness]

My mother could die the same day because of her heart issues. Sometimes I wish she could leave soon, so I could ctb more "easily".

 

[tomame]

don't have one .. not one ):

 

[rainy.tears]

I don't want to leave my loved ones behind and hurt them. I have a small, tiny bit of hope that maybe things will get better one day.

 

[A Sit of Doubting]

because there are so many liberties life has given us, evil and cruel as it is. i dont believe ill ever experience them , but love is sooo abundant i will forever hope i find my happiness!!

also, ur experience seems horrible, i am infinitely sorry u have to go thru something like that. your intentions are pure, and as little the effect you think your efforts had made, i promise you, its definitely made a difference. dont ever think lowly of yourself if ever you cry or hyperventilate, its only natural, given the circumstances you face.

lots of love!!!! i hope you find a new reason to live!!

 

[HeyBoogahJr]

What's your reasons to live? I was searching for a reason from the young age, but I feel like nothing i find is good enough to shut up my ctb thoughts or to unachievable.
It used to be changing the world for better, for some time. I was (still when possible) part of protests/rallies, helping communists, do donations, will probably try to volunteer where possible and get accepted, trying to make the world a bit more peaceful, but I feel like nothing I do is good enough. World is still shit and my efforts do nothing. I'm also very limited in my actions with government for various reasons. And I am tired. Also, my used to be friend who was creating an anarchist society for my college with me, hurt me badly and even tried to delete me from our work, so I feel like I'm choking whenever I want to do anything good for the campus, as I know there is high chances I'll stumble upon him as he is very active in these spaces and have no understanding of business and personal relationships and might actually do smth bad (I'm avoiding him, I fear if I ever see him again, I'll just start hyperventilating and maybe even cry like pathetic little bi tch I am)
So…. I need another reason to live…. What are yall reasons to live?

I hope you find a reason, a reason just for you, and one that'll bring you joy. I'm sorry to hear that things haven't been going well for you. I don't think you're a "pathetic little bitch," either. Your feelings are valid, and it's okay to cry when you see someone who has hurt you.

As for myself, and my reasons:

I know that I have inherent value as a person. I don't need to earn love or space, I can just do my own thing and enjoy it. I know that there will never be another person like me, I'm wholly unique, I've got endless possibilities within me.

It sucks that I plan on dying. I feel that I could do so much, but I kind of just don't want to anymore.

I think if anything could make me stay, it would be finding love in something. A person, a home, a job, something that will make the loneliness hurt less whenever I burn.

Something my friend told me was: "All the things I'll miss doing, seeing." Ya' know, FOMO.

I hope this helps. I hope you feel better soon. I hope you find a reason that's worthwhile. And maybe, you can stay a while.

 

[Imausername]

My reason... You can be breathing your last breath and you still have hope you'll live. Ppl buy lotto tickets and hope to win. It's that unrealistic anti logic that keeps me here waiting to hear the bad news. But I should judt ctb before i get the results

 

[Shadows From Hell]

 

[thenextstory]

It's hard to imagine not regretting it. The fear of death is too strong. Even if I had access to euthanasia, I'm still scared that once I got the needle/sipped the poison/whatever, my body and mind would compulsively reject it and it would be nightmare-adjacent, if only for a few seconds or minutes.

When I've ever gone under anaesthesia, I've felt this muted yet existential panic every time, and I'm worried dying would be like that.

 

[SarahThrowsGin]

Not so much reason, but spite. Sheer spite, and the desire for vengeance.