why havent you done it already?

[killawithme]

besides the fact that dying is scary

I see many, many people that say death is scary, but I never found death scary. I see a lot of people who are really against suicide trying to keep people who want to leave this world alive by any means necessary, even locking them up, and I'm like, if you have to go that far, isn't it better to then just let someone go? By the way, I'm new here.

I'd be long at peace if I could just simply decide to permanently cease existing as non-existence is all I want, for me ceasing to exist would be the positive solution to find peace from this existence so torturous and every second is torture to exist.

I find it terrifying how a human can be tortured in this existence for decades longer just to face the agony of old age which is why I suffer so much from existing in this horrific world where humans have made suicide into a crime even know this existence was so tragically imposed, there's just so much evil in anti-suicide.

All that anti-suicide people do is all they can to make it so others suffer for as much as long as possible in this existence that just leads to decay and death anyway and it's just so horrific to me how these people just want others to be tortured against their wishes making this painful, deeply undesirable existence into a prison where one cannot escape, all that anti-suicide people do is just cause so much more harm and suffering, to exist in this evil world truly is a terrible punishment to me, all I want is peace from the terrible, tragic mistake of existence.

I agree it's pretty stupid if you think about it.

 

[Liebestod]

I have the means to do it, I'm just procrastinating and being a coward.

 

[SleeplessAndSad]

Because of my parents and i'm scared that i will mess it up and end up worse than before.

 

[Jisatsu]

Need a better rope

 

[MAKE IT STOP!]

1. that I'll end up hurting someone
2. that I'll fail and end up becoming a vegetable for the rest of my life

 

[kouna]

Waiting for my divorce to be completed and the fact that it was the holidays has made it take longer

 

[Lilithium]

I don't know, honestly. I guess it's fear of the unknown at this point. Fear that it will not be peaceful, that it will hurt, that I will fail and end up with severe issues because of it, that if there is something after it will be a bad thing because I decided to do that. Some days the thought of a fade to black is comforting, some days it's terrifying. There's people that care about me that I don't want to hurt, but that has been less and less of a reason recently.

 

[Feldsparc]

Let me see...had an affair with my husband's nephew. We both had undiagnosed bpd and thought it was true love. but actually it was a bpd favourite person relationship which became toxic. I couldn't break away from it because of our history and stayed in the affair until it was found out which was traumatic to say the least. I also was migrating to Australia at the time. I then suffered age regression, identity loss, abandonment fears, everything.. my family found out. I still couldn't give up the relationship, I went between Australia and India several times to prevent the nephew from abandoning me. Severe emotional dysregulation. Now I'm in the middle of a divorce. Just 2 years ago I was happy and content with life. Now I have to die to escape my thoughts and guilt and the fact and consequences of what I did.

 

[bl33ding_heart]

Lack of painless accessible methods. :/

 

[gardenoflonely]

Still researching methods

 

[AdeptFenster8773]

Can't pass out from partial and I don't have any realistic alternatives.

 

[thunder_rayne]

Attempted? I've tried more times than a few. The reality for me is the failure risk is not worth the risky punishment. I will never understand how attempted suicide carry such harsh punishments.

The possible punishments are not necessarily a complete deterrent, but I will admit, I only attempt if I'm confident I will succeed. My failed attempts are partly due to lack of knowledge regarding the attempt and desperation.

 

[interna]

trying to decide on SN or hanging

 

[TorturedMike888]

I'm very picky about it, because it has to be done in a way that won't cause me to panic. That's why I'd like to use inert gas, but I only have so much money. My life is falling apart, and I need to get it done before the year is over. So I don't have a choice but to take my time, or otherwise I won't get another chance like this for awhile. I wish I could just use any method to off myself, but that's never worked for me in the past.

 

[gardenhouse]

I still have a mortgage wtih my partner, insurance will not release the mortgage claim in case of death by suicide for the first 13 months since signing up, and since I just signed up in March this year, it will only become effective in April next year, great, isn't it? and also all the painless CTB are hard to find since I live in a country, NZ with freaking strict border control.

 

[ijustwannabeloved]

Cause it's scary, and I'm a pussy.

 

[Bishop]

I lack the constitution

 

[insectontrial]

Cowardice.

It's that simple.

 

[Lilythefenfen]

I don't know anymore

 

[Imausername]

1% chance i make it through my issues ok... waiting till it know its 0%