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I masturbate ___

  • although Jesus can see it

  • precisely because Jesus can see it


Results are only viewable after voting.
motel rooms

motel rooms

Survivor of incest. Gay. Please don't PM me.
Apr 13, 2021
7,081
Do you masturbate despite the fact that Jesus can see it or precisely because you know he's watching you?
 
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Reactions: KuriGohan&Kamehameha, settheory, Sanva and 4 others
O

OrcWitch

Warlock
Sep 3, 2021
702
I only have gay sex in the missionary position with the lights off, the way god intended. Jesus approves
 
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Reactions: Worndown, Sanva, Feeding Pigeons and 6 others
Amumu

Amumu

Ctb - temporary solution for a permanent problem
Aug 29, 2020
2,623
To be entirely honest I'd like to fuck Allah in the ass, but we can't have everything, can we.
 
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Reactions: Feeding Pigeons, littlelungs, callme and 1 other person
Murasa

Murasa

"The Great Little Captain"
Dec 3, 2020
1,756
"Man give me some privacy, because things like these Longinus didn't impale you in a pleasant way".
 
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Reactions: motel rooms
narval

narval

Enlightened
Jan 22, 2020
1,188
Wait. Jesus sees me? This means that i can confess my sins meanwhile i'm doing that?
 
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Reactions: Silenos and motel rooms
motel rooms

motel rooms

Survivor of incest. Gay. Please don't PM me.
Apr 13, 2021
7,081
I only have gay sex in the missionary position with the lights off, the way god intended. Jesus approves
He approves because he can see in the dark. :))
 
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Reactions: OrcWitch
callme

callme

I'm a loose cannon - I bang all the time.
Aug 15, 2021
1,234
  • Like
Reactions: OrcWitch and motel rooms
Snake of Eden

Snake of Eden

“Ye shall be as gods..🍎 🐍”
Jun 22, 2021
2,473
You so obsessed with him. It is about time to move on. Jesus Christ (smh)… 🙄
 
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Reactions: Sherri
motel rooms

motel rooms

Survivor of incest. Gay. Please don't PM me.
Apr 13, 2021
7,081
"Man give me some privacy, because things like these Longinus didn't impale you in a pleasant way".

The name Longinus derives from the Latin "longus" = "long, extended, large". It would've been impossible for him to make the first impalement pleasant. :haha:
 
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Reactions: Wrennie
Ashu

Ashu

novelist, sanskritist, Canadian living in India
Nov 13, 2021
825
Like Marcus Aurelius, to relieve the burden.
 
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Silenos

Silenos

Ṿ̸̄Ọ̶͂Ỉ̶͉D̴̞͝ ̴̲̐A̷̾͜W̷̪͒Ā̵̯I̵͍̅T̵̛͔S̷̗͛
Jul 25, 2020
1,056
I'm a celibate virgin, so no.
 
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Reactions: callme
motel rooms

motel rooms

Survivor of incest. Gay. Please don't PM me.
Apr 13, 2021
7,081
You so obsessed with him. It is about time to move on. Jesus Christ (smh)… 🙄

I can't move on, that would be a major sin. The Lord commands me to obsessively worship His Son with everything I have. My soul was murdered, so I have to do it with my sinful body. Also, every Catholic boy in my country is told that Jesus watches him when he chokes the chicken, it's not like I'm making anything up.

No comments…..sigh

That's a comment. *sigh* Remember to say a prayer for all the poor pedophile priests the next time you visit Fatima.
 
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Reactions: Snake of Eden
motel rooms

motel rooms

Survivor of incest. Gay. Please don't PM me.
Apr 13, 2021
7,081
Wait. Jesus sees me? This means that i can confess my sins meanwhile i'm doing that?

Of course. Why else do you think he watches you? He's not some kind of perv!
 
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Reactions: narval and Wrennie
lostundead

lostundead

Student
Mar 18, 2021
192
He's not some kind of perv!
"A young man, wearing nothing but a linen garment, was following Jesus. When they seized him, he fled naked, leaving his garment behind." -Mark 14:51-52

You sure about that?
 
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Reactions: Wrennie, settheory and motel rooms
T

Torschlusspanik

Waste of oxygen
Feb 5, 2022
19
The actual question is whether or not he enjoys watching: would that make him a voyeur of some kind? If that were the case, I would have found something in common with Jesus, enlightening.
 
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Reactions: Wrennie, Foresight and motel rooms
motel rooms

motel rooms

Survivor of incest. Gay. Please don't PM me.
Apr 13, 2021
7,081
I'm a celibate virgin, so no.

Jesus does not love you.

Judging No Way GIF by Cameo
 
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Reactions: Silenos and nolongerhuman
D

Deleted member 8579

Enlightened
Apr 28, 2021
1,323
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Reactions: lostundead, Wrennie, Torschlusspanik and 3 others
motel rooms

motel rooms

Survivor of incest. Gay. Please don't PM me.
Apr 13, 2021
7,081
So just like Santa Claus then? :wink:

That fatass? Jesus is pure beefcake, baby.


https://i.sanctioned-suicide.net/images/2021/10/134566_PPCapture-1.png
 
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Reactions: Wrennie
Foresight

Foresight

Enlightened
Jun 14, 2019
1,393
I masturbate with Jesus in mind :wink:
 
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Reactions: settheory, Wrennie, Sanva and 1 other person
Feeding Pigeons

Feeding Pigeons

Warlock
Aug 5, 2021
776
We need to go further back to the Romans and Greeks to get to gods that I'd fuck.
 
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Reactions: Murasa, Torschlusspanik, Amumu and 2 others
settheory

settheory

Bundle of perceptions
Jul 29, 2021
457
LOL (LOVE Our Lord)
 
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Reactions: BeansOfRequirement and Wrennie
KuriGohan&Kamehameha

KuriGohan&Kamehameha

想死不能 - 想活不能
Nov 23, 2020
1,805
when jesus finds you, does he find the clit as well? 🤔
 
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Reactions: ColorlessTrees, settheory, Sanva and 2 others

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