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Beyond_Repair

Beyond_Repair

Disheartened Ghost
Oct 27, 2023
452
I have my date set. I have the stuff. I have tied up loose ends and made peace with the guilt I have been wrestling with.

And since around that time I have just felt such a sense of inner peace and a bit of numbness, but in a contented sort of way. I feel so detached from anything and I have been noticing a significant lack of anxiety that normally consumes my thoughts. I feel like I've lost myself, in the best way possible. I've been reminiscing on happy moments in my childhood that I haven't thought about in years

I am a bit confused by this (not uncomfortable though, it's been nice), since I have been feeling more free and different I wonder if that's a sign I'm changing for the better?

In reality though I know it's because I no longer have to worry about work, bills, toxic family, people in general, etc.

It's so absurd that I've felt the calmest and most content I've ever been knowing it's almost over
 
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3/4Dead

3/4Dead

Peace, Love, Empathy
Feb 27, 2024
450
From what I've heard, a lot of people experience this. Consider how many people talk about how a person why know who comitted suicide seemed happier than they'd been in years the week or day before they were gone. It's peaceful, sometimes exciting to know you can finally rest.
 
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mistymoo

mistymoo

Im going to be apart of the 27 club
May 30, 2024
148
Whenever I would start breaking down I would start planning my end and it calmed me right down. I would assume it has something to do with taking control of a situation you feel you've been spiraling out of control with
 
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Beyond_Repair

Beyond_Repair

Disheartened Ghost
Oct 27, 2023
452
From what I've heard, a lot of people experience this. Consider how many people talk about how a person why know who comitted suicide seemed happier than they'd been in years the week or day before they were gone. It's peaceful, sometimes exciting to know you can finally rest.
I've definitely heard people talk about what you're describing. It's such a freeing feeling. I know it must seem incomprehensible for a normie or outsider, but the feeling that nothing matters and your worries are inconsequential is so freeing
Whenever I would start breaking down I would start planning my end and it calmed me right down. I would assume it has something to do with taking control of a situation you feel you've been spiraling out of control with
That makes sense, I can definitely attest to the feeling that I have complete control over my own life, for once
 
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