why are you still here?

[scarredheart]

hopefully this doesn't come off wrong, but i'm genuinely wondering what's still keeping us going in life.
for me it's mainly the fear of hurting others / lack of resources to ctb.
So, as the title says, what's been keeping you on earth this far ?

 

[Molotongo]

For me personally, it's my mom
I never had a friend, a real dad or anything in life but my mom was always there and always has been there, I should have been dead last summer, I didn't talk about it to anyone.
I distanced myself more and more from my mother and one day I said I'm going for a walk and I hugged her as good bye, I was on my way when my mom texted me that she felt like that was a goodbye forever and that she's really worried
That was the moment where I realised that I can't go yet, I can't make my mom this sad, she wouldnt be able to ever recover from that so I try to get better so I won't ruin her life but it's pretty hard, nothing helps and I will only get medication for my depression if I go into a mental hospital but I was there once and It was hell
I'm still waiting because I can't do this to my mom, she cares about me day and night and she has always been there for me

 

[fatpigiee]

My beloved ones are in hard time and I don't want to make it harder

 

[UserFromNowhere]

Because some annoying voice in my head keeps telling me to not give up on life yet in spite of the intense desire to die.

 

[Rainork]

Because I'm a coward and my SI is stronger than me.
I've set a date in just under 2 weeks and will be trying a new method to hopefully take SI's power out of my actions, will it work? Time will tell.
The reason I've stayed for this long seems similar to many others, because my suffering seems irrelevant compared to the pain my actions will cause others, this reasoning has shifted recently for me though.

 

[krsm98]

mainly due to a mix of waiting for my method and also some sort of guilt for my friends and my dad, i dont want to hurt them with me dying or causing more unecessary harm so i dont want to do that
(and kind of cuz of my SI being very strong :/)

 

[vascomorrow]

hopefully this doesn't come off wrong, but i'm genuinely wondering what's still keeping us going in life.
for me it's mainly the fear of hurting others / lack of resources to ctb.
So, as the title says, what's been keeping you on earth this far ?

I want my life to have a meaning, that im not completely useless. At least Kurt Cobain and Robin Williams could say they accomplished something.