I have been suicidal since around 10 years old. my personal life was always very happy. I never saw any real trauma, death, fighting etc. Yet, I've always felt like I was going to die by suicide. Ive had two main attempts, one by partial and the other by od. Ive been to the psych hospital twice. I just want it to be over.but I dont feel like I have good access to any real methods. I live in michigan. I have a medical card so that rules me out of gun ownership. Recently its been so bad ive thought about going to a gun range but im worried about the mentlal effect it will leave on others. then again if theres no other option theres no other option right? theres not a good jumping location. let me know how I can go about this.
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