Venting these meds arent doing fucking anything

[Leonard_Bangley39]

i know its supposed to take a few weeks for them to really have any effects, but its so frustrating. i hate myself, i hate everything about myself, i wanna kill myself, i wanna cut like crazy and give myself even more scars than i already have, i wanna walk out in the middle of nowhere and disappear, i wanna suck start a shotgun and blow my brains out. everyone told me that depression meds would make me feel emotionless and empty and hollow, well they arent doing that. they arent doing jack shit. ive been taking 50mg of sertraline (zoloft) once daily and 50mg of hydroxyzine up to tree times daily for about a week and a half now and i dont feel anything. in the beginning all i felt was tired and drowsy. now i dont even feel drowsy anymore. it feels like im just taking nothing. next time i go see the doctor, i'll tell them i want to try a different medication, but in the mean time in just so pissed and frustrated about everything. i fucking hate myself. i just want to be chemically lobotomized until im a fucking vegetable who cant think anything ever.

 

[RadiantNumber]

Do you thought about therapy or different shrink?
Cause zoloft could cause drowziness
Anyway aending a lot of hugs and support, tho I know it is not real help

 

[Leonard_Bangley39]

im glad that i got rid of all my razors a few weeks ago

 

[Adaephon]

Depression meds do take time for their effect to start working, at least a few weeks.
If it doesn't work at all, you can always try different molecules and if you're still unlucky there are proved alternatives like transcranial magnetic stimulation that are very effective and with almost no side-effects.
That's not much, but warm thoughts and support anyway.

 

[k1w1]

i know its supposed to take a few weeks for them to really have any effects, but its so frustrating. i hate myself, i hate everything about myself, i wanna kill myself, i wanna cut like crazy and give myself even more scars than i already have, i wanna walk out in the middle of nowhere and disappear, i wanna suck start a shotgun and blow my brains out. everyone told me that depression meds would make me feel emotionless and empty and hollow, well they arent doing that. they arent doing jack shit. ive been taking 50mg of sertraline (zoloft) once daily and 50mg of hydroxyzine up to tree times daily for about a week and a half now and i dont feel anything. in the beginning all i felt was tired and drowsy. now i dont even feel drowsy anymore. it feels like im just taking nothing. next time i go see the doctor, i'll tell them i want to try a different medication, but in the mean time in just so pissed and frustrated about everything. i fucking hate myself. i just want to be chemically lobotomized until im a fucking vegetable who cant think anything ever.

Of course they dont! After losing everything you find in a country and western song when an earthquake turned my city into a pile of rubble, I was put on Mirtazapine.
My choice as it makes you sleepy and gives one an appetite, both issues when living in sheds, abandominiums etc.
Here's what also happened. They are notorious for creating suicidal ideation. It was crazy, so was I. You just get this warm fuzzy idea that 'hey, I could die and this wont matter anymore'. And it develops, and with every step in that direction it became my raison d'etre.
Im an old guy but I can tell you this: I have lost more than you have considered owning. I have been in a few wonderful love affairs that shaped parts of me and that I am grateful for.
I did not get the best start in life but I lived life with scant compromise and sought approval from people who I respected. You sound youthful, you'll be fit, you can do what you want but we have to make a start.
Get rid of the bad people, and move forwatd like an adventure book you are writing.
Best to you

 

[SoLowHollow48]

The first few months will feel like nothing is "happening" at all. But I hope that you're able to close off all the noise and keep yourself close with people who understand the sort of hell you're in right now. Glad that you shared this with us, truly. I hope that on the next appointment, your doctor allows you to try different medications. I know how this looks like. I know this will make you feel like some sort of lab rat but the truth is that, medications are just like that. Some work on others, some don't--and to this day, scientists have not been able to find an absolute in terms of drug efficacy.

Like RadiantNumber had previously implied, therapy should compliment your treatment if you are capable of affording a session. If you aren't, come here more frequently and talk to us! Vent and confide. None of us knows your address and cares enough to want to stalk you. We're literally fighting everyday not to die hahah