• ⚠️ UK Access Block Notice: Beginning July 1, 2025, this site will no longer be accessible from the United Kingdom. This is a voluntary decision made by the site's administrators. We were not forced or ordered to implement this block.

sancta-simplicitas

sancta-simplicitas

Wizard
Dec 14, 2023
613
I've been having a couple of decent days. Bearable, sometimes even actually pleasant. Which made the idea of CTB seem very distant, because I felt so alive. Whenever this happens, I start to examine the option of keeping going and it always creates a massive anxiety and overwhelm. There would be so many things I'd need to fix, so much uncertainty, so many new painful memories and all of those things started mattering way less when I decided to CTB. So everything I can do in order to cope with life is deciding I'm going to end it, but that ironically makes me feel like living is an option, then I can't cope again because I don't want my life.

The human psyche is not a fun one.
 
  • Hugs
  • Aww..
Reactions: Forever Sleep, Ash and DeIetedUser4739
U

Username1359751

Enlightened
Mar 14, 2024
1,331
I haven't experienced it much, but they say emotions ar temporary. Come in waves. Tell you to "wait until a bad one passes." I don't suppose you did anything differently?
 
sancta-simplicitas

sancta-simplicitas

Wizard
Dec 14, 2023
613
I haven't experienced it much, but they say emotions ar temporary. Come in waves. Tell you to "wait until a bad one passes." I don't suppose you did anything differently?
I think the only thing I've done differently is that I haven't done anything at all. I've let myself go and have barely had a care in the world.
 
  • Informative
Reactions: Username1359751

Similar threads

MyShadow
Replies
0
Views
90
Suicide Discussion
MyShadow
MyShadow
W
Replies
10
Views
304
Suicide Discussion
Off_Switch
Off_Switch
lavenderlilylies
Replies
3
Views
182
Suicide Discussion
lavenderlilylies
lavenderlilylies
matchalavendercake
Replies
2
Views
127
Offtopic
ayla
ayla