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platypus77

platypus77

Experienced
Dec 11, 2024
277
Life is meaningless. The bus is coming. We don't know when, but it always arrives.

Where does it go? Who cares? It's a one-way trip, and the ticket was punched at birth.

But until then, we wait. And if nothing matters, then everything is permitted. So let's pass the time with one last act of absurdity before we board.

Rules?
  • Do or imagine something ridiculous.
  • Write it here or reply an existing one.

Because if we have to go, we may as well go out in style.

Examples:

---

"I stood in my closet, holding a belt, staring at the ceiling. After a long, dramatic sigh, I looped it through my jeans instead. Turns out, I just needed a new belt. Crisis postponed."

Reply:

"I did the same thing, but the belt didn't fit. So now I'm just standing here, pants around my ankles, contemplating my life choices."


---

"I filled my bathtub, got in fully clothed, and plugged in my toaster. Not to use it—just to see if it would judge me. It didn't. I made a bagel instead. Ate it soggily. Nothing changed."

Reply:

"I tried this, but I was out of bread. Just sat there with an empty toaster, staring at my reflection in the metal. I think I lost the staring contest."


---

"I called my internet provider and told them I was canceling my service because 'I won't be needing it anymore.' The guy on the phone asked if I was moving. I just whispered, 'In a way.' Then I hung up."

Reply:

"I called my landlord and told him to start looking for a new tenant. He asked when I was leaving. I just said, 'Soon.' He asked if I was breaking the lease. I said, 'In a way.'"


---

"I wrote a suicide note. Spent an hour making sure it was poetic, haunting, and unforgettable. Folded it, placed it on my desk, and then… went to bed. Woke up, reread it, cringed, and threw it in the trash. Maybe next time."

Reply:

"I left my note under my roommate's pillow. He never mentioned it. Now I'm just stuck in a silent game of 'who will break first?'"


---

"I dug a shallow grave in my backyard. Laid in it for a while. Neighbors stared. After a few hours, I got up, dusted myself off, and just went back inside. No one stopped me. I think they understand."

Reply:

"I did this but left my front door wide open when I went outside. When I came back in, nothing had changed. Not a single thing was touched. That's how I knew. No one cares."


---

Now it's your turn. What absurd thing are you doing while we wait for the bus?
 
Gl1tch3d G1rl

Gl1tch3d G1rl

My mom must've had a virus coz I was born a glitch
Aug 10, 2021
1,346
Oooo, sounds fun!

I was checking my shower to see if it was sturdy enough, then got up on the chair and started tying the rope around it. However, before I got done tying, I tripped and fell on the floor. I ended up sitting on the bathroom floor with a sore butt instead. 😓
 
EmptyBottle

EmptyBottle

Friends with Aera23
Apr 10, 2025
412
I entered the bathroom, saw the floor unclean and that my shower can't even hold itself*, and left.

* = jk
 
SecretDissociation

SecretDissociation

Suicide enthusiast
Sep 11, 2022
394
I entered the bathroom, saw the floor unclean and that my shower can't even hold itself*, and left.

* = jk
I too had a funky shower. Tried to hang myself from it, slipped and turned on the shower itself. Turns out I just needed a shower
 
  • Yay!
Reactions: EmptyBottle

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