Impulsive attempts rarely work. I should know, done them enough times. They just lead to even more self hatred and a sense of failure.
If you want to do it, plan it properly.
The bedsheet didn't work last time, remember?
So take a breath, do something active to work off the adrenaline and energy that's coursing through your system right now and then sit down with a clearer head and plan this fucker. If you're going to do it, do you want it to work?