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ncmxm

ncmxm

Experienced
Jun 9, 2021
234
My life isn't worth living, but I'm too much of a coward to choose the better option
 
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Z

Zerengin96

Student
Jun 14, 2022
126
I would ctb if i get my hands on SN, but its hard to get here
 
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Huntfish34

Huntfish34

Enlightened
Mar 13, 2020
1,619
Same for me,. Feel very worthless / useless and still can't manage to pull the damn trigger. Fml. -
 
FuneralCry

FuneralCry

Just wanting some peace
Sep 24, 2020
44,132
I think that feeling as though you are unable to go through with ctb doesn't mean that you are cowardly, suicide is very difficult after all and I think that if it was easier to leave, I would already be gone. The fear of failing ctb is what holds me back from attempting. I also do not see my life as being worth living and I just see no point to it all. I am tired of suffering each day. I think that suicide should be easier, it is cruel how others want to deny us ways to peacefully exit. Life is so horrible.
 
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Musketeer

Student
Jan 24, 2020
188
My life isn't worth living, but I'm too much of a coward to choose the better option
when your hit with enough shit in life, and it exeeds your ability to cope with it, you will find the courage. We are not deigned to kill ourselves so it's is seen to our instincts as a huge risk. Shit has to go really bad before you say fuck it to your base instincts.
 
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Klophy

Lost...
Jun 28, 2022
198
Yeah, i sttuggle with the courage part as well; that and the pain / fear of failing. I feel like i go through so much already, can't take on anymore you know?
 
L

Lost in a Dream

He/him - Metal head
Feb 22, 2020
1,823
Same here. I'm hoping that I can mentally prepare myself to finally go through with it after a year has gone by. The idea of spending another 30+ years as a wage slave just so I can pay taxes to a government that doesn't give a shit about me, and hoping I might live long enough to retire doesn't seem worth all the BS.

If I don't CTB soon, I'll probably end up dying from cancer or heart problems long before I'm old enough to retire, and if I managed to survive those things, I'd probably end up disabled and chronically ill from them anyway. It would be much better to leave on my own terms and be in control of the process.
 
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