Sodium Nitrite finally arrived. Still unsure though.

[J1214]

Hello everyone.

The two 8 ounce bags of Sodium Nitrite I ordered have finally arrived.

I'm happy, but also unsure. Unsure about what I don't know. Maybe the right time to use it?

Anyone else with their own Sodium Nitrite amounts feel this way?

In case I forget when the time does come, thank you Sanctioned Suicide for everything.

 

[Traveller12724]

Hello everyone.

The two 8 ounce bags of Sodium Nitrite I ordered have finally arrived.

I'm happy, but also unsure. Unsure about what I don't know. Maybe the right time to use it?

Anyone else with their own Sodium Nitrite amounts feel this way?

In case I forget when the time does come, thank you Sanctioned Suicide for everything.

I have had my sn for a month now but until this week I didn't know when I would feel ready but now I feel ready and there is no longer any doubt in my mind, I have set a date and it feels right.

 

[calculusmaster]

I'm also feeling this way but not in the way of uncertainty. I can either get my hands on some benzos to prevent seizures thus making a lot of noises or wait until the day I get home alone for half a day at least.
I'm really grateful for living in a country where it's really easy to get medications without prescriptions.
I've got PPis, antacid, meto, propanolol and the sn itself but I made a promise to myself to smoke all the existent cigarette brands in my country before ctbing There are only 2 left so I haven't got much time left.
If I were you i'd have a second think and see if ctbing is really your only option as of now, it all depends on your mental health, health complications, age, etc.
Even though I'm really young (19) I really don't see any more meaning in life anymore. If you're really commited to ctb do a thorough research to make sure everything works out smoothly.

I do not condone any means of suicide or things of the sort

 

[divinemistress36]

Its ok to keep it as like a safety blanket . I have mine but not planning to use it yet its comforting to just have it there

 

[BackToLobby]

I still got it but I remind myself every day that I don't have to rush it

 

[lostintheloop]

Take your time. Having a method ready can bring up conflicting feels. Whilst it may be a relief it can also feel frightening that now it seems more real. But now you have it, there's no rush. Ctb is a huge and final decision , there's a lot to think about. So give yourself time to think and decide what's best for you. Nothing to lose now you have what you need.

 

[KuriGohan&Kamehameha]

As someone who has had a method for years now, it brings a sense of security and feeling as if there are options (albeit painful) if I truly can't take things anymore and hit my limit. Some people say their urges actually wane when they have access to a method, due to feeling more in control and having agency over one's existence. With such a stable shelf life, it will last for years and can be put on the back burner as a means of self-assuaging. Just because another option or door options, doesn't mean one should feel rushed to make a decision, there are so many years to ponder the matter as an individual and come to whatever decision you feel is best for yourself.

Ctb is the final decision anyone can make and I think it should always be contemplated carefully and examined from every angle. There is no shame in taking one's time to examine what you want out of life and if the things that would make you happy are possible before resorting to a very final decision. I don't mean to sound like those positivity guru type people, but ctb is the last choice anyone can ever make, and there's no turning back past a certain point. That's a sombering thought demanding reflection, I know.

Death will always be waiting, but life may not be guaranteed for another day, so perhaps that elicits the strength to carry on a bit longer and have ample time to contemplate what you want. Knowing this can be comforting, that there's no rush.

 

[J1214]

Take your time. Having a method ready can bring up conflicting feels. Whilst it may be a relief it can also feel frightening that now it seems more real. But now you have it, there's no rush. Ctb is a huge and final decision , there's a lot to think about. So give yourself time to think and decide what's best for you. Nothing to lose now you have what you need.

As someone who has had a method for years now, it brings a sense of security and feeling as if there are options (albeit painful) if I truly can't take things anymore and hit my limit. Some people say their urges actually wane when they have access to a method, due to feeling more in control and having agency over one's existence. With such a stable shelf life, it will last for years and can be put on the back burner as a means of self-assuaging. Just because another option or door options, doesn't mean one should feel rushed to make a decision, there are so many years to ponder the matter as an individual and come to whatever decision you feel is best for yourself.

Ctb is the final decision anyone can make and I think it should always be contemplated carefully and examined from every angle. There is no shame in taking one's time to examine what you want out of life and if the things that would make you happy are possible before resorting to a very final decision. I don't mean to sound like those positivity guru type people, but ctb is the last choice anyone can ever make, and there's no turning back past a certain point. That's a sombering thought demanding reflection, I know.

Death will always be waiting, but life may not be guaranteed for another day, so perhaps that elicits the strength to carry on a bit longer and have ample time to contemplate what you want. Knowing this can be comforting, that there's no rush.

Thank you for these responses.

Was very impulse driven when I saw the Sodium Nitrite I have now for sale. Definitely going to think long and hard now that I have it.

I have had my sn for a month now but until this week I didn't know when I would feel ready but now I feel ready and there is no longer any doubt in my mind, I have set a date and it feels right.

Good luck to you.

 

[Wish2Exit]

Hello everyone.

The two 8 ounce bags of Sodium Nitrite I ordered have finally arrived.

I'm happy, but also unsure. Unsure about what I don't know. Maybe the right time to use it?

Anyone else with their own Sodium Nitrite amounts feel this way?

In case I forget when the time does come, thank you Sanctioned Suicide for everything.

I too am receiving 25g of sodium nitrite soon. But I ordered it after learning there are two types SN "metals basis" and SN "analytical reagent." And I ordered the metal basis one because I'll receive much sooner than the other type. Do you or anyone else know what if any difference there is between these subtypes and whether or not the difference would affect its effectiveness in CTB?

But yes, I also feel unsure like you do, and my ambivalence has to do with not having certainty that it will work or that my procedure is sound. I plan to first anti-emetics and then take about 20 Lunesta pills an hour before. I will then drink a mixture of 15 grams SN with filtered water (although I've read that distilled is better) followed by a second cup of water and the remaining 10 grams SN.

Perhaps like you, even though I've thought, researched, and planned this extensively, I still have doubts as to whether or not I know what I am doing. Thanks for any helpful information.

I too am receiving 25g of sodium nitrite soon. But I ordered it after learning there are two types SN "metals basis" and SN "analytical reagent." And I ordered the metal basis one because I'll receive much sooner than the other type. Do you or anyone else know what if any difference there is between these subtypes and whether or not the difference would affect its effectiveness in CTB?

But yes, I also feel unsure like you do, and my ambivalence has to do with not having certainty that it will work or that my procedure is sound. I plan to first anti-emetics and then take about 20 Lunesta pills an hour before. I will then drink a mixture of 15 grams SN with filtered water (although I've read that distilled is better) followed by a second cup of water and the remaining 10 grams SN.

Perhaps like you, even though I've thought, researched, and planned this extensively, I still have doubts as to whether or not I know what I am doing. Thanks for any helpful information.

I forgot to ask

Hello everyone.

The two 8 ounce bags of Sodium Nitrite I ordered have finally arrived.

I'm happy, but also unsure. Unsure about what I don't know. Maybe the right time to use it?

Anyone else with their own Sodium Nitrite amounts feel this way?

In case I forget when the time does come, thank you Sanctioned Suicide for everything.

Hi, I forgot to ask you if you can tell me if you ordered one of the subtypes I mentioned in my prior post, or something else? thank you