Second thoughts about ctb

[LostitAll]

I would do anything to have my parents alive again.
Be thankful to have parents. "Don't know what you
got until it's gone."

 

[Lena]

Whenever it comes time to ctb, or whenever I have an opportunity, I always back out. I've thought about it and realized if I keep backing out, maybe I should look and see if it's possible to improve my life. I don't want to crush my parents. They'll probably never get over it if I ctb, and one of the things that makes it hard to go through with it is thinking about their reaction to finding out. For a long while I thought I was a burden and they'd be better off without me (and to be fair, I am a bit of burden), but they wouldn't be happy. They would be devastated. I'm lucky to have the loving, supportive parents I do.

I'll keep the supplies just in case. I love this forum due to how supportive and kind everyone is, so I'll probably continue going on it. But I am going to have to rethink ctb.

And may all of you find peace no matter what you decide to do.

I'm glad to hear that :)
Why were you suicidal in the first place?

 

[Donewith_]

Whenever it comes time to ctb, or whenever I have an opportunity, I always back out. I've thought about it and realized if I keep backing out, maybe I should look and see if it's possible to improve my life. I don't want to crush my parents. They'll probably never get over it if I ctb, and one of the things that makes it hard to go through with it is thinking about their reaction to finding out. For a long while I thought I was a burden and they'd be better off without me (and to be fair, I am a bit of burden), but they wouldn't be happy. They would be devastated. I'm lucky to have the loving, supportive parents I do.

I'll keep the supplies just in case. I love this forum due to how supportive and kind everyone is, so I'll probably continue going on it. But I am going to have to rethink ctb.

And may all of you find peace no matter what you decide to do.

Very good to see that you are thinking that way.. our Ultimate desire is to ' better our situation', either by trying out all the options in life or by ctb'ing (for those who can't). The good thing here is you are realising the 'value of things ' you have..Give yourself a gift by giving life a try.. blossom again..
Wish you all the best

 

[Prime]

Its wise to rethink it. I am in support of your decision.

 

[Anon1337]

Having constantly changing thoughts makes me even more depressed. Sometimes I want to live then the next day I want to die. Life is becoming hell.

 

[Trashcan]

I'm glad to hear that :)
Why were you suicidal in the first place?

Mental illness, not having a future, being lazy and not wanting to spend most of my waking hours at work.

 

[Lena]

Mental illness, not having a future, being lazy and not wanting to spend most of my waking hours at work.

I'm sorry :(
What is your mental illness?:/

 

[Lara Francis]

Whenever it comes time to ctb, or whenever I have an opportunity, I always back out. I've thought about it and realized if I keep backing out, maybe I should look and see if it's possible to improve my life. I don't want to crush my parents. They'll probably never get over it if I ctb, and one of the things that makes it hard to go through with it is thinking about their reaction to finding out. For a long while I thought I was a burden and they'd be better off without me (and to be fair, I am a bit of burden), but they wouldn't be happy. They would be devastated. I'm lucky to have the loving, supportive parents I do.

I'll keep the supplies just in case. I love this forum due to how supportive and kind everyone is, so I'll probably continue going on it. But I am going to have to rethink ctb.

And may all of you find peace no matter what you decide to do.

Hi.
Thankyou for your well wishes.Its great to hear you will give life other go and see what improvements can be made.
Your parents sound lovely and I can see you love them dearly.so it sounds like it's not your time to go.
I wish you peace and happiness
Please stay as part of our community as you are a much valued and loved member xx

 

[Trashcan]

I'm sorry :(
What is your mental illness?:/

Depression and social anxiety. You seem so kind, Lena. :) May I ask what your reasons are for wanting to ctb?

Hi.
Thankyou for your well wishes.Its great to hear you will give life other go and see what improvements can be made.
Your parents sound lovely and I can see you love them dearly.so it sounds like it's not your time to go.
I wish you peace and happiness
Please stay as part of our community as you are a much valued and loved member xx

Thank you

 

[nzdarkshark]

Good luck on your recovery - it's a brave thing to do to want to get better. I wish you the greatest luck I can give.
As for me, I feel like I don't belong in this world, at least not in this form. I truly believe my time will come soon to depart.
Would miss you all though.

 

[TheGoodGuy]

I feel the exact same way word for word <3

 

[Limbo]

Not committing suicide is always a better outcome, as long as its not forced. Suicide is dirty business. I have nightmares everyday because of this. I wish I had hope like you, but here is no hope for me (chronic illness).

Wish you the best.