Scared to order SN

[attheend13]

I know there's a lot of talk about it. I have made a file with all the info I've gotten here. I'm scared to order it and have the way out. Do I not want to die? I want out. But I want a chance at life more but after years of trying fighting and recovering I'm exhausted and in watching the people around me slowly get sick of me. I want to acquire what I need but if it's in the house on a night like tonight I'll use it. I'm conflicted and scared. I seriously can't even die with dignity. I hate myself for being me.

 

[BrokenMindAndBody]

I wouldn't be scared to order it. Can someone direct me? You can do it in a round about way, too. I understand the whole not being direct sort of thing on here. Send me a message.

 

[moonmuse]

so even i hv the contacts the dealer and the money to buy sn but even i get to a point where i question if its worth it idk whos the bigger loser here me or the people who made me reach this level but dying is something u cant undo so maybe if u consider still fighting for peace so continue with it

 

[ih34rty0u]

i used to think the same, but ive had a few really terrible breakdowns (cried that i wanted to die and also other had people telling me to kill myself) since i received my sn and i still didnt have the courage to actually open the bottle.