I honestly am ready to kill myself but scared to do it I could easily hang myself tried it before. I just keep thinking about my family how sad they would be.
Unknown21
The past never dies.
- Apr 25, 2023
- 1,152
I think about doing it Thursday and I think about my siblings, I grieve for the life that could have been lived too. I don't know why it's so complicated. I doubt my decision every time I get closer, it's hell. I'm not afraid of the method or the execution or the failure, it's just these thoughts and the guilt and the fact that I can never go back. Also the idea of nothingness has been bothering my mind lately.
L9 CHOCOSYRUP
L9MY LIVES ON
- Nov 3, 2023
- 247
Death is the gate towards leaving this hellfire, and finding the peace you deserve.
AnderDethsky
/̵͇̿̿/'̿'̿ ̿ ̿̿ ̿̿ ̿̿(╥﹏╥)
- Oct 19, 2024
- 108
I have the same thing, only I will most likely do it through SN. I'll probably just use it without anything, at most I'll drink something for heartburn and before that I'll deprive myself of sleep for 1.5 days in order to be calm instead of getting hold of hard-to-get sedatives. But I keep postponing this day. I'm even offended that I didn't do ctb on 12.12.24. It was such a beautiful date for this. It seems that we, stuck here, can only hope that our time for this will come, the very time when the threshold for entering the bus will recede from us. Finally, because even for physiological reasons, fear, like any feeling, cannot always remain as intense.
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