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encore

encore

she/her • BPD • rOCD
Nov 14, 2024
166
i've been too scared to sleep lately. at first i was scared of sleeping alone, then it slowly changed to being scared of sleeping at night, scared of sleeping in silence, and now i just have general anxiety when it comes to not being awake or conscious. it feels like i never get any deep, quality sleep anymore. i have so many dreams and most of them are either stressful or straight up nightmares. it's been ongoing for months.

i just want someone to share a bed with, or even just stay at home with me. ugh. being alone and single is the worst for me right now :( i would get anxiety medication if i could…
 
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bankai

bankai

Enlightened
Mar 16, 2025
1,869
I too don't look forward to sleep anymore. I have sleep apnea. My sleep is usually the stuff of nightmares, literally. Getting up over and over again. Kicking my legs out and then trying to go to sleep and somehow getting maybe four to five hours of sleep after staying in the bed for around 8:00 to 9:00 hours. Not fun at all.
 
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darksouls

darksouls

Warlock
May 10, 2025
726
same as you
my nightmares are killing me
 
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Valhala

Valhala

Arcanist
Jul 30, 2024
487
After I broke up with her for the third time, because of my impatience and some disagreements, the only woman I truly loved in my life, I thought that loneliness was the worst thing. When I finally managed to force myself to try with someone else, I experienced an even deeper connection with her. I got love, I got understanding, tenderness, but I still suffered without her. Finally, what I always knew, but I couldn't admit it to myself, was revealed to me. love, it's not togetherness, it's not understanding, sex or anything like that that I really need. The only thing I need is her and only her, exactly as she is with all her faults and virtues. Love, true love is a very dangerous thing - there is no possibility of exchange, compromise, forgetting. I feel as if I don't exist without her, no matter what I do and no matter who I try to be with. Everything has become meaningless, everything. And now, all I have left are memories of our togetherness and dreams.U we always meet in dreams, we always make up and be together again, happy. Dreams are the only thing left for me in this life, the only place where we are still together. The worst of all is that somewhere I feel and know that she loves me too, still, but her anger, pride and her nature do not allow us to try again.
 

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