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Sphinxi

Sphinxi

Student
Jan 4, 2026
121
As preparation for my suicide, I have been writing a series of notes, one to my campus rabbi. He and I aren't particularly close, but I am confessing to him that I had never really believed. In addition, I am also trying to justify my suicide on religious grounds.

If we are all here to serve a purpose set forth by G-d, what purpose do the suicidal serve? I think that maybe we show his glory by demonstrating that the pain of the world is such that it is too much for some people to bear, and that this demonstration is part of G-d's plan for the suicidal.

So I ask users of faith: how do you square your suicide with your religion?
 
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I

itsgone2

-
Sep 21, 2025
1,206
Ultimately I can't. God will decide. Can God explain why my life is this tortuous? Why it was allowed to go so bad? Why I was made the way I was? It's all tragic and I'll never understand it and I wish it would just go away
 
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Sphinxi

Sphinxi

Student
Jan 4, 2026
121
Ultimately I can't. God will decide. Can God explain why my life is this tortuous? Why it was allowed to go so bad? Why I was made the way I was? It's all tragic and I'll never understand it and I wish it would just go away
It's ultimately out of our control, but I earnestly do hope that if he is real, that I do understand after I die. I do think that our lives being torturous serves some purpose, if he exists
 
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Chabrychek

Chabrychek

Member
Dec 23, 2025
17
Only faith stops me from committing suicide.. I want to be with God after death, and everything points to suicide being a grave sin. I really don't know what to do..
 
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Sphinxi

Sphinxi

Student
Jan 4, 2026
121
Only faith stops me from committing suicide.. I want to be with God after death, and everything points to suicide being a grave sin. I really don't know what to do..
Suicide is a sin, but I think typically it is alieved by the following things:
-often times a person is mentally ill or on drugs, and here we can say that illness killed them, not themselves
-when a person commits suicide, there is often a moment after they will surely die, but before they actually die, in this moment a person can regret it or otherwise reach out for forgiveness
Have you ever talked to your rabbi (or equivalent) about this?
 
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M

metfan647

Student
Jun 12, 2025
169
If you don't believe, as you claim to in your original post (assuming you mean in the celestial dictator), why would you need to justify anything to your rabbi or rationalise your decision on 'religious grounds'?

Why square anything with your religion? You have no religion if you don't believe. Arguably you also have none if you're sitting on the fence. You're free...

*Typo edit
 
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Sphinxi

Sphinxi

Student
Jan 4, 2026
121
If you don't believe, as you claim to in your original post (assuming you mean in the cestial dictator), why would you need to justify anything to your rabbi or rationalise your decision on 'religious grounds'?

Why square anything with your religion? You have no religion if you don't believe. Arguably you also have none if you're sitting on the fence. You're free...
I am pretty confident that a G-d exists but I don't believe in any particular religion despite my wanting to. Despite that, my religious practice was pretty important to me. I guess I was more rationalizing it as a thought exercise, and because despite not really believing my religion used to be something that I oriented my life around
 
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Chabrychek

Chabrychek

Member
Dec 23, 2025
17
Suicide is a sin, but I think typically it is alieved by the following things:
-often times a person is mentally ill or on drugs, and here we can say that illness killed them, not themselves
-when a person commits suicide, there is often a moment after they will surely die, but before they actually die, in this moment a person can regret it or otherwise reach out for forgiveness
Have you ever talked to your rabbi (or equivalent) about this?
I plan to talk to a priest about this. But I can guess what the answer will be – it's a mystery of God, and all we can do is hope for the best. However, for almost 2000 years, the Church has been saying that suicides go to hell, and I just can't believe this new, happy narrative. Even though I know God is love, and knows what Im going through, I'm afraid he'll reject me
 
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serenitydream

serenitydream

Member
Jan 10, 2026
18
If I choose suicide I feel that I'll sever myself from God. I want to love God and to follow Him; that's my only hesitancy. But I've been overwhelmed by suffering and emotion before which caused an attempt. I can only hope that if I reach that point again that He will have mercy on me and forgive me, but that's not something I'd like to count on.
 
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OnMyLast Legs

OnMyLast Legs

Too many regrets
Oct 29, 2024
1,065
If you ask me, I'm an atheist, but I have this deep sense that Catholic morality and psychology are true. Despite Noah's freaking Ark, witchcraft being real, angels and demons being everywhere trying to influence people, and other wild and crazy Christian beliefs. I feel like deciding once and for all for atheism and ending my life will damn me, but I also think that's irrational. So I just stew in mental illness. Fun!
 
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F

ftm68_99

Member
May 4, 2023
53
I plan to talk to a priest about this. But I can guess what the answer will be – it's a mystery of God, and all we can do is hope for the best. However, for almost 2000 years, the Church has been saying that suicides go to hell, and I just can't believe this new, happy. Even though I know God is love, and knows what Im going through, I'm afraid he'll reject me
I can't believe that a just and loving God would do anything so cruel as to reject you for ending your life. And it's not as if you would be rejecting God by such an act, anyore than you'd be rejecting people you love on earth by ending your life.
As to continue suffering, I don't think that suffering ennobles one or makes one more loveable in God's sight. Again, that would make God seem cruel, as if he enjoys knowing his creation is suffering.
 
persepexa

persepexa

Specialist
Feb 7, 2025
360
I've actually done a lot of research into this since I began my suicide journey. All of the Abrahamic faiths (Judaism, Christianity, Islam) view suicide as a grave sin. Christians and Muslims in particular view it as the worst sin of all because you are rejecting the gift of life God gave you.

In eastern traditions where reincarnation is a feature it is also looked upon unfavourable, there are a lot of technical terms in Hinduism in particular, but essentially committing suicide can lead to an unfavourable reincarnation in the next life.

Me personally I was raised Catholic and although I rejected the Catholic faith as an adult I still plan on going to a Catholic Church and finding a priest to give me the Sacrament of Confession, saying a few decades of the rosary, and praying for forgiveness before I CTB. I know it sounds silly but it's so engrained in me from a young age. I know suicide goes against my religion and I just feel like I can't CTB until I get right with God about it.
 
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badatparties

badatparties

Warlock
Mar 16, 2025
779
All religions are false! Except mine of course, and the particular sect i belong to. You have to believe in god this exact way, perform these rituals, and call him by this name.

Otherwise you burn in hell Yo! Sounds completely logical.
 
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Chabrychek

Chabrychek

Member
Dec 23, 2025
17
I can't believe that a just and loving God would do anything so cruel as to reject you for ending your life. And it's not as if you would be rejecting God by such an act, anyore than you'd be rejecting people you love on earth by ending your life.
As to continue suffering, I don't think that suffering ennobles one or makes one more loveable in God's sight. Again, that would make God seem cruel, as if he enjoys knowing his creation is suffering.
It is true that suicidal thoughts are not consistent with Jesus teachings, they are linked to hatred, sorrow, and jealousy. We reject the cross He gave us to bear. And that's the rejection of God the Church speaks. I'm Catholic, and the Church's teaching has been clear for hundreds of years, suicide is a grave sin.
It's such a pain that you know something is wrong but you can't stop. But I agree with you in the sense that I deeply feel God would forgive us
 
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