TechyLikesStars
Member
- Sep 3, 2025
- 6
I don't really know if this is a post that's common or even appropriate for this kind of forum, but I wanted to talk about it and maybe see if anyone else has shared similar experiences. I'm a person that's really prone to having nightmares, I basically have them every other night. It sucks, because everytime I think I get used to them, they just get even worse/harder to deal with. I once secretely tried getting myself melatonin when I was 16 to help me sleep better, but my mother found out and quickly put an end to that. But my nightmares in general aren't the main topic of this post.
I think it started when I was about fourteen, I started having this one reouccuring nightmare. At the beginning, it was much more simple and straight to the point. I opened my eyes, and I'd be in what seemed like a large auditorium of sorts (?), or at the very least a massive room with blank walls, and ceilings too high for me to even look at, it just seemed like an infinite black void when I looked up. As I'd navigate the area, I'd eventually see them. Nooses beginning to just drop down from the "ceiling", one by one, slowly. When I'd turn away from them, I almost thought they'd get closer to me when I wasn't looking. I feel like suicide has been tempting me for ages, and this nightmare almost felt like my subconscious trying to push me over the edge, and tempt me to "hang myself".
Each time I had the nightmare, it seemed to get more detailed, with little changes creeping in as the years went by. Sometimes, the "auditorium" I'd find myself in was a bit harder to get to. I'd have to go through all kinds of paths, navigate all these odd and confusing mazes, and I'd always be met with the same blank fucking gray door. Even though I always knew what it'd lead to, I'd always feel inclined to open it. Other times, I'd be wearing formal clothing in these nightmares, and I figured my subconscious associated these nightmares with the idea of my own funeral, hence the suit and tie. There were other instances where distant music could be playing throughout the nightmare, eerie and nostalgic, it almost seemed to echo in my head (To be fair, I've fallen asleep to The Caretaker's music quite a few times, so that probably didn't help). On top of that, sometimes I could almost hear the nooses "whispering" to me, or at the very least some sort of voices trying to tempt me.
Here's where things got really fucked up though. As if this nightmare wasn't already eerie enough, I remember it immediately becoming much worse with one simple variation, and it never went back from that again. I was in that nightmare again as usual, navigating through hallways of sorts when I finally made it to the door. I hate how helpless you are in nightmares, I know what's behind that fucking door and yet my body still moves on its own to turn the damn knob, despite my subconscious screaming at me to stop. And then I see it. The nooses have fucking bodies on them. I can never forget the sound of the fucking ropes creaking around the necks of those corpses, their faces puffy and pale. Some of the corpses would be way too high for me to even reach, while some would easily be at arms length. It'd only get worse with time, though. Eventually the corpses would belong to people I knew. Old friends or family members. Over time, the nightmares grew darker, filled with the piercing sound of blood-curdling screams, and sounds of gagging and choking. These nightmares have left me with a terrible fear of both nooses and the sounds of screams.
I used to have these nightmares regularly throughout my adolescence, but eventually my nightmares became alot more vague, and the imagery of nooses didn't appear as often. I stopped thinking about it for a while. While those dreams didn't come to me for a while, I still dream about suicide pretty often, and I basically wake up feeling terrified and shaken every time. The other night though, I had an almost "pleasant" dream when it came to suicide. It was like flipping a switch, on and off, and it was harmless. It just immediately killed me, and I was met with nothing but a black void. Not the kind of void you see when you're asleep. I was still dreaming, and only just conscious enough to acknowledge that I had died. I was "dead", and yet it was so comforting and pleasant.
This week however, I dreamt about it again. I woke up horrified, I can't possibly believe I'm gonna have to start going through all these fucking dreams again every night. I guess I just wanted to write about it to sort of vent about the whole ordeal, but also out of curiosity to see if anyone else has had similar experiences in their nightmares, dreaming about suicide or anything death related? Maybe I could figure out why my subconscious subjects me to all this, and why specifically the imagery of nooses (Hanging is probably the last method I'd consider, I'm too scared to even come close to a noose let alone a rope). If you have any stories to share or ideas, please feel free to share them.
I think it started when I was about fourteen, I started having this one reouccuring nightmare. At the beginning, it was much more simple and straight to the point. I opened my eyes, and I'd be in what seemed like a large auditorium of sorts (?), or at the very least a massive room with blank walls, and ceilings too high for me to even look at, it just seemed like an infinite black void when I looked up. As I'd navigate the area, I'd eventually see them. Nooses beginning to just drop down from the "ceiling", one by one, slowly. When I'd turn away from them, I almost thought they'd get closer to me when I wasn't looking. I feel like suicide has been tempting me for ages, and this nightmare almost felt like my subconscious trying to push me over the edge, and tempt me to "hang myself".
Each time I had the nightmare, it seemed to get more detailed, with little changes creeping in as the years went by. Sometimes, the "auditorium" I'd find myself in was a bit harder to get to. I'd have to go through all kinds of paths, navigate all these odd and confusing mazes, and I'd always be met with the same blank fucking gray door. Even though I always knew what it'd lead to, I'd always feel inclined to open it. Other times, I'd be wearing formal clothing in these nightmares, and I figured my subconscious associated these nightmares with the idea of my own funeral, hence the suit and tie. There were other instances where distant music could be playing throughout the nightmare, eerie and nostalgic, it almost seemed to echo in my head (To be fair, I've fallen asleep to The Caretaker's music quite a few times, so that probably didn't help). On top of that, sometimes I could almost hear the nooses "whispering" to me, or at the very least some sort of voices trying to tempt me.
Here's where things got really fucked up though. As if this nightmare wasn't already eerie enough, I remember it immediately becoming much worse with one simple variation, and it never went back from that again. I was in that nightmare again as usual, navigating through hallways of sorts when I finally made it to the door. I hate how helpless you are in nightmares, I know what's behind that fucking door and yet my body still moves on its own to turn the damn knob, despite my subconscious screaming at me to stop. And then I see it. The nooses have fucking bodies on them. I can never forget the sound of the fucking ropes creaking around the necks of those corpses, their faces puffy and pale. Some of the corpses would be way too high for me to even reach, while some would easily be at arms length. It'd only get worse with time, though. Eventually the corpses would belong to people I knew. Old friends or family members. Over time, the nightmares grew darker, filled with the piercing sound of blood-curdling screams, and sounds of gagging and choking. These nightmares have left me with a terrible fear of both nooses and the sounds of screams.
I used to have these nightmares regularly throughout my adolescence, but eventually my nightmares became alot more vague, and the imagery of nooses didn't appear as often. I stopped thinking about it for a while. While those dreams didn't come to me for a while, I still dream about suicide pretty often, and I basically wake up feeling terrified and shaken every time. The other night though, I had an almost "pleasant" dream when it came to suicide. It was like flipping a switch, on and off, and it was harmless. It just immediately killed me, and I was met with nothing but a black void. Not the kind of void you see when you're asleep. I was still dreaming, and only just conscious enough to acknowledge that I had died. I was "dead", and yet it was so comforting and pleasant.
This week however, I dreamt about it again. I woke up horrified, I can't possibly believe I'm gonna have to start going through all these fucking dreams again every night. I guess I just wanted to write about it to sort of vent about the whole ordeal, but also out of curiosity to see if anyone else has had similar experiences in their nightmares, dreaming about suicide or anything death related? Maybe I could figure out why my subconscious subjects me to all this, and why specifically the imagery of nooses (Hanging is probably the last method I'd consider, I'm too scared to even come close to a noose let alone a rope). If you have any stories to share or ideas, please feel free to share them.
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