Discussion Realization

[shadow11]

I was lying in bed this morning like in a half dream state when every realization that has brought me to the point of ctb flashed through my mind, like a movie. My illness, the doctors giving me the wrong meds, not being able to get out of my house, my family not helping me and the constant fear all came flashing by. I woke up in a panic. Needless to say, it made me realize that ctb is the only way. I cant get the help I need , I will not go back to a psych hospital and the medical drs just blow it all off. My family just thinks I can get over it. I will have to ctb soon to avoid any more pain from this situation and that is my realization.

 

[Jackblade]

What will be your method ?

 

[shadow11]

What will be your method ?

Full suspension hanging I would have preferred N but cant afford that

 

[Zzzzz]

I believe I've had similar experiences. It was pretty scary when I first realized how alone I really am. And that the people closest to me can't be trusted.

 

[Final Escape]

Full suspension hanging I would have preferred N but cant afford that

I'm considering going with hanging I bet it only hurts for a few mins. It would be easier bc no backing out once u kick the chair. I want to feel the pain lol!

 

[Definitelyworried]

I was lying in bed this morning like in a half dream state when every realization that has brought me to the point of ctb flashed through my mind, like a movie. My illness, the doctors giving me the wrong meds, not being able to get out of my house, my family not helping me and the constant fear all came flashing by. I woke up in a panic. Needless to say, it made me realize that ctb is the only way. I cant get the help I need , I will not go back to a psych hospital and the medical drs just blow it all off. My family just thinks I can get over it. I will have to ctb soon to avoid any more pain from this situation and that is my realization.

I've experienced this many times it's such a horrible feeling.

 

[shadow11]

I was lying in bed this morning like in a half dream state when every realization that has brought me to the point of ctb flashed through my mind, like a movie. My illness, the doctors giving me the wrong meds, not being able to get out of my house, my family not helping me and the constant fear all came flashing by. I woke up in a panic. Needless to say, it made me realize that ctb is the only way. I cant get the help I need , I will not go back to a psych hospital and the medical drs just blow it all off. My family just thinks I can get over it. I will have to ctb soon to avoid any more pain from this situation and that is my realization.

My time is getting close

 

[shadow11]

I've experienced this many times it's such a horrible feeling.

I hope it's not horrible but I cant go on like this

 

[Deleted member 847]

I'm considering going with hanging I bet it only hurts for a few mins. It would be easier bc no backing out once u kick the chair. I want to feel the pain lol!

There's no pain, whoever told you that hanging is like suffocating on CO2 lied to you. You faint in 10 seconds because the pressure closes the artery that supplies the brain with oxygenated blood.

 

[Jackblade]

I know the feeling of being totally alone and empty inside. It's like you are nothing in this big universe, no one gives a fuck about you. And the only way to not feeling this anymore is killing myself. This is terrifying, very terrifying..