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nintendo64

nintendo64

mr. kill myself
Dec 19, 2025
68
I've had a lot of physical health problems.
Debilitating postural orthostatic tachycardia syndrome, cyclic vomiting, chronic pain, etc. A lot of my problems are cryptic, I've had a permanent fever for over a year and doctors have no idea why. Makes me feel like absolute shit, like I have the flu constantly. I've had to go to the ER a lot for stuff like vomiting so much to the point I can't keep liquids down and need IVs, and I'm in debt because of it. I was also in a car wreck and they insisted I needed a useless CAT scan which ran me 1600$. I thought I died for a moment when my friend crashed her car into that truck, I was so happy, and let me just say it was the most disappointing moment ever when I realized I was still alive lol. Kind of solidified my intent to take my own life.
I can never hold down a job since I constantly come very close to passing out, can't stand in place and vomit so much. I'm also anorexic and extremely physically weak, I can barely lift 10lb from doing nothing but laying in bed every day for so long. My resting heart rate is 130bpm and it gets to the 250s which feels god awful. I can't even get disability payment either since it's so hard to obtain. I'm stuck dirt poor and having to mooch off my family whenever my food stamps run out, it makes me feel so burdensome so I try to eat as little as possible because of it.
Anyone else struggling with their physical health or medical debt as part of why they want to ctb?
 
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ipmanwc0

ipmanwc0

Doctor Sleep
Sep 15, 2023
620
I have severe full body chronic tension and no sensation as part of why I want to ctb
 
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nintendo64

nintendo64

mr. kill myself
Dec 19, 2025
68
I'm sorry to hear that. I hope ctb can bring you peace and free you from your pain.
 
unluckysadness

unluckysadness

Enlightened
Jul 9, 2025
1,058
I feel you because I have several physical issues including dystonia which gives me muscle spasms and constant pain. Adding severe mental health issues so it's becoming unbearable and that's why I need to ctb.
 
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Xiaojiu

Xiaojiu

cease to exist 不复存在
Mar 28, 2025
752
Yes, I have chronic illnesses and live with chronic pain 24/7. It's the reason I'm on this site
 
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U

urgent

Student
Dec 6, 2025
115
Me too. Very bad health, chronic illnesses and chronic Severe pain 24//7. It's why I'm here too. I can't take it. I have to find a way.
 
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UnoX48

UnoX48

Member
Jan 6, 2026
20
J'ai eu beaucoup de problèmes de santé physique.
Syndrome de tachycardie orthostatique posturale invalidant, vomissements cycliques, douleurs chroniques, etc. Beaucoup de mes problèmes sont inexpliqués. J'ai une fièvre permanente depuis plus d'un an et les médecins n'en comprennent pas la cause. Je me sens vraiment mal, comme si j'avais la grippe en permanence. J'ai dû aller aux urgences à de nombreuses reprises, notamment à cause de vomissements si importants que je ne pouvais plus garder les liquides et que j'avais besoin de perfusions. Résultat : je suis endettée. J'ai aussi eu un accident de voiture et ils ont insisté pour que je passe un scanner inutile qui m'a coûté 1 600 $. J'ai cru mourir un instant quand mon amie a percuté ce camion. J'étais tellement heureuse ! Et croyez-moi, la déception de réaliser que j'étais encore en vie a été immense. Ça a renforcé mon envie de mettre fin à mes jours.
Je suis incapable de garder un emploi car je suis constamment à deux doigts de m'évanouir, incapable de rester debout et je vomis sans arrêt. Je suis aussi anorexique et extrêmement faible physiquement ; je peux à peine soulever 5 kg alors que je reste alitée toute la journée. Mon rythme cardiaque au repos est de 130 bpm et il monte jusqu'à 250, ce qui est insupportable. Je n'arrive même pas à obtenir une allocation d'invalidité, car c'est très difficile à faire. Je suis dans une situation de grande précarité et je dois dépendre de ma famille dès que mes allocations alimentaires sont épuisées. Je me sens tellement à charge que j'essaie de manger le moins possible.
Y a-t-il d'autres personnes qui rencontrent des difficultés liées à leur santé physique ou à leurs dettes médicales, ce qui explique en partie leur souhait de se retirer du marché du travail ?
Based on your symptoms and medical history, you likely suffer from cranio cervical instability (CCI).
 
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