People keep telling me do the right thing. Suicide IS the right thing.

[VolatilePotato]

I've hurt a lot of people. I've hurt myself. I have a lot of regrets and things I can't shake from my past. I've been abused, sexually abused, hurt, destroyed, broken. And in turn I did that to others. I hurt a lot if people, bled on those who did not cut but instead tried to understand. And I broke them because I am broken. And i hate myself for it. There is no healing. There is no salvation. They say do the right thing and get institutionalized.

No. The right thing is for me to die. It is my choice. No one else's. And if I tell you, it meant that I trusted you enough to not spread it around. Accept that this is my decision. Accept that this is the final closure. For everyone I've hurt and for me. I'm sorry, but that us my truth. Don't try to save me. I do not want to be saved.

 

[randomz]

Maybe if you try being instituionalized then something good will come out of it? Maybe if you keep on living, you will be able to do good to others and start making up for the bad things you did? Maybe there is still hope to change your life? Have you thought on that?

 

[VolatilePotato]

Maybe if you try being instituionalized then something good will come out of it? Maybe if you keep on living, you will be able to do good to others and start making up for the bad things you did? Maybe there is still hope to change your life? Have you thought on that?

Oh, I've tried. For maaaany years. It's all the same

 

[Tomm58]

I've hurt a lot of people. I've hurt myself. I have a lot of regrets and things I can't shake from my past. I've been abused, sexually abused, hurt, destroyed, broken. And in turn I did that to others. I hurt a lot if people, bled on those who did not cut but instead tried to understand. And I broke them because I am broken. And i hate myself for it. There is no healing. There is no salvation. They say do the right thing and get institutionalized.

No. The right thing is for me to die. It is my choice. No one else's. And if I tell you, it meant that I trusted you enough to not spread it around. Accept that this is my decision. Accept that this is the final closure. For everyone I've hurt and for me. I'm sorry, but that us my truth. Don't try to save me. I do not want to be saved.

I Hope you find peace no matter what you decide. Some people will never know the sort of pain we feel (extreme despair, etc) but it isn't their fault. Nor is it your fault for the choices you made from the hand that was dealt to you. People will base their reactions on feelings, not reasoning. This is the reason why I think it is stupid choice to look for comfort in your loved ones. They will naturally want you to get better regardless of your situation. Thus the dilemma. People in this day and age aren't ready to deal with traumatized and tortured souls. Well, not yet. Maybe in 20 years or so. Sorry I digress...

I just wanted to say, I understand. I'll see you on the side.

 

[VolatilePotato]

I Hope you find peace no matter what you decide. Some people will never know the sort of pain we feel (extreme despair, etc) but it isn't their fault. Nor is it your fault for the choices you made from the hand that was dealt to you. People will base their reactions on feelings, not reasoning. This is the reason why I think it is stupid choice to look for comfort in your loved ones. They will naturally want you to get better regardless of your situation. Thus the dilemma. People in this day and age aren't ready to deal with traumatized and tortured souls. Well, not yet. Maybe in 20 years or so. Sorry I digress...

I just wanted to say, I understand. I'll see you on the side.

That's exactly it. It's foolish for me to believe that death is imminent or warranted in some cases. I'm not telling anyone anything besides here from now on