Venting Nobody can convince me it’s not beautiful

[Liebestod]

It's such a courageous act. Whenever I come across a dead person and the cause of death is suicide I get this hard feeling of "damn, they did it, they had it in them, they had the choice, they stared death in the face and dove straight at it". I don't know when I'll die, hopefully my heart just stops beating when I go to sleep but the odds of that are slim. But I hope I do it and do it reasonably sooner rather than later.

 

[plzoffme]

it is beautiful

 

[Lyn]

It is beautiful. And it is awful. Pretty much like everything in this existence.
And this dichotomy drives me insane, tbh...

 

[ididnotconsent]

It is beautiful. And it is awful. Pretty much like everything in this existence.
And this dichotomy drives me insane, tbh...

Yeah, it seems like everything needs an opposite. Hot, cold, up, down. What would it be like if the world was perfect and we never knew pain or sadness. Would we even have free will then? Do we have free will now? So many unanswered questions.......and yeah it's enough to drive you mad.

 

[starboy2k]

i go on google and search up any new suicides…just to feel something.

 

[SomewhereAlongThe]

I keep spending my days trying to get there.... trying to get to the point where I'm ready again and I feel it in my bones like I did.
Maybe this time it's just different. I'll be ready but in a different way. I don't want to fear this when I long for it. Like you said, it's a beautiful thing. It really is, putting on my hood and sitting back, breathing in the gas... leaving this world. It's a beautiful thing.

 

[FuneralCry]

I understand, I also just wish to be gone, all I want is to never suffer ever again, for me non-existence is just the only peace and is all I see as desirable, I only envy those who are no longer burdened with this futile, torturous existence.

 

[breathingblues]

Hmmm, I see death like an enemy waiting to be defeated, I've always seen things, that are challenging as enemies to be defeated, even small/abstract ideas.

But then again I've always enjoyed masochism to absurd extremes. I want to die by immolation, but even we wishing you to die aren't granted wishes. This world is indeed hell.

 

[UglyLife82]

I think the same thing