Maybe if the friend who 'would rather hear your story than your eulogy' existed it wouldn't feel like this is an option at. But I can't keep living hoping someone someday wants to spend a little bit of time with me. Truthfully how will anyone even know I'm gone? No one reaches out. No one talks. No one interacts. My bf will but even he is too busy to do anything with me. So we just eat dinner and watch tv and that's been the extent of our relationship. And then I get the bullshit of how solo hiking is sooo dangerous and stupid todo and it like well are you going to come with me or do you expect I'll just give up hiking for your comfort? I've honestly gave up everything else that used to bring me join. Last thing is hiking and quite frankly it will be nice to leave with a view. Spend my last moments looking out on civilization knowing I was never meant to be a part of it.
