From my perspective, which was not really asked for, everyone wanna be in a relationship so that they don't feel alone, but imagine being in a relationship and STILL feeling alone. Having a SO isn't gonna cure any mental disorders, it actually requires you to be in a good place to have them, no one wanna be around depressed people, no one wanna have a depressed partner, and... that is just how the world works, even with regular work, social or familiar relationships. I have known lots of people who thought that a relationship would fix all of their problems, and sadly, it doesn't. You have to put the effort into fixing yourself first, going to therapy, taking yours medication - if needed, working on your confidence and self esteem (trust me, no girls will be turned on by your standard self loathing), and so on. I know that what I'm about to share is merely personal, but, I once had dozens of friends, had a relationship, was often invited to parties, social functions and stuff like that, and surprisingly enough, I still felt this deep and indescribable void in my chest, I realized that putting others happiness above mine was not the way to go, I was expecting them to fulfill one void that I myself don't know how to. I am somewhat prettier than the average woman in my country, I can legitimately pull anyone I want, but what is the goal? Only to think that I have someone beside me? Someone to share things to do? Genuinely, what is the purpose of that? Then again, I always come to the same question: why do I need someone to do for me what I even can't do for myself? Anyways, once again, this is just my perspective, but for you to even think about a relationship, imo it's ideal that you look within yourself first and think if it's worth it, none of us can say that for yourself. I don't know how it is like for you in your country and how the therapists are over there, but, where I live, there are professionals specialized in self esteem issues.
