lemonadeandgrapes
New Member
- Jun 8, 2025
- 4
Hi, I'm a long time lurker and made a post a couple months ago. Just thought i would give a little pick-me-up to u guys.
Being on here is so hard when you're actively suicidal, and you can feel like existing day to day sucks ass. Back a couple months ago I felt such an intense ache, like the world was in grey. I was so close to ctb, cried for hours (I hardly ever cry so it was bad) and I was so close to booking a ticket to my spot.
Days are sometimes hard, even weeks and months. But please if I can say anything, please please please think about everything before you go. You could be at rock bottom, but you've got the whole world to wake up to. Even if it means going to a shop and speaking to the cashier, or speaking to someone random on the street- get out there, the world doesn't stop spinning when you die, but it sure as hell gets a whole lot more boring. There's no more laughing at funny videos, your favourite songs, smiling at people on the street, watching your childhood cartoons- when you die, there's no longer a world to wake up to.
This isn't a deterrence post, because what you're feeling is valid, you are valid.
But please feel the earths heartbeat, even if it's just to say hello to me (I love hearing from people, anyone and everyone, don't ever hesitate to say what's up to me- I love talking hahah.)
Whatever has happened, you are still here and the hazy sunsets and breezy mornings are right there with you. Even when it feels like people in the world are assholes, the trees still want you to wander beneath their branches, the birds still look out for you when you grab groceries and the sun is waiting for another day it gets to spend with you here.
When the world is grey, and you're aching or numb- just know that every fibre of this earth is holding you. You don't have to be okay right now, you can feel, you can hate, curse, put your middle finger up to the world. But you have got this, and even if you don't the world has got you- the little glimmers of being alive have got you. They will grow, weep and love you- just please remember…
Life is tough, but YOU are tougher.
Being on here is so hard when you're actively suicidal, and you can feel like existing day to day sucks ass. Back a couple months ago I felt such an intense ache, like the world was in grey. I was so close to ctb, cried for hours (I hardly ever cry so it was bad) and I was so close to booking a ticket to my spot.
Days are sometimes hard, even weeks and months. But please if I can say anything, please please please think about everything before you go. You could be at rock bottom, but you've got the whole world to wake up to. Even if it means going to a shop and speaking to the cashier, or speaking to someone random on the street- get out there, the world doesn't stop spinning when you die, but it sure as hell gets a whole lot more boring. There's no more laughing at funny videos, your favourite songs, smiling at people on the street, watching your childhood cartoons- when you die, there's no longer a world to wake up to.
This isn't a deterrence post, because what you're feeling is valid, you are valid.
But please feel the earths heartbeat, even if it's just to say hello to me (I love hearing from people, anyone and everyone, don't ever hesitate to say what's up to me- I love talking hahah.)
Whatever has happened, you are still here and the hazy sunsets and breezy mornings are right there with you. Even when it feels like people in the world are assholes, the trees still want you to wander beneath their branches, the birds still look out for you when you grab groceries and the sun is waiting for another day it gets to spend with you here.
When the world is grey, and you're aching or numb- just know that every fibre of this earth is holding you. You don't have to be okay right now, you can feel, you can hate, curse, put your middle finger up to the world. But you have got this, and even if you don't the world has got you- the little glimmers of being alive have got you. They will grow, weep and love you- just please remember…
Life is tough, but YOU are tougher.
