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Lazy

Lazy

Just let me sleep
Feb 25, 2025
30
Existence has been getting much worse lately and so I'm starting to passively prepare for ctb, not really a set date or anything, I just want to have the option at hand. So I am currently considering on whether I should leave a note for my closest friends or not. FYI its a small group of 2-4 people to whom I have several times talked about my suicidal tendencies, of which one is even suicidal themselves (thus I'm not going into detail, since they might be here as well). I just want them to know that they did everything they could for me and how much I enjoyed our time together, also it feels like giving them at least a bit of closure would be nice. Also I'm considering to leave them one note for them all in our group chat, instead of separate ones, just because we've always discussing issues together in there and it feels more appropriate that way. My main concern is that it will do more harm than good and I don't want that under any circumstance.
I know the final decision is mine, I'm just asking for your thoughts and advice on the matter since its been weighing down on me for quite a while but I can't really discuss it with anyone either.
 
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Reactions: EmptyBottle and monetpompo
U. A.

U. A.

Some day the dream will end
Aug 8, 2022
2,007
I'm not qualified but caring people will endlessly wonder what happened if there's no last message. If you've talked about things with them it might be a bit easier, and even with a note there will still be doubt and despair, but it might be a sobering task for you to write one and refine it as you reflect over time.
 
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ilovepsyschonaut4

ilovepsyschonaut4

hikikomori
Nov 19, 2025
47
Existence has been getting much worse lately and so I'm starting to passively prepare for ctb, not really a set date or anything, I just want to have the option at hand. So I am currently considering on whether I should leave a note for my closest friends or not. FYI its a small group of 2-4 people to whom I have several times talked about my suicidal tendencies, of which one is even suicidal themselves (thus I'm not going into detail, since they might be here as well). I just want them to know that they did everything they could for me and how much I enjoyed our time together, also it feels like giving them at least a bit of closure would be nice. Also I'm considering to leave them one note for them all in our group chat, instead of separate ones, just because we've always discussing issues together in there and it feels more appropriate that way. My main concern is that it will do more harm than good and I don't want that under any circumstance.
I know the final decision is mine, I'm just asking for your thoughts and advice on the matter since its been weighing down on me for quite a while but I can't really discuss it with anyone either.
I completely understand this concern, however I really think it'll only do more harm than good depending on how you word your last message. Perhaps you can add how grateful you are for your friends and how they couldn't stop this from happening. Hope I helped.
 
  • Informative
Reactions: EmptyBottle
E

eternalpace

Student
Oct 18, 2025
185
I've been writing and editing a note that I'm leaving online. When I die, a link to the note will be accessible... Most of my family knows of my struggles over the years, so nothing should come as a surprise.
 
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SpencerSees

SpencerSees

I want to swim until my arms give out 🍀
Feb 22, 2023
139
It's definitely better to leave a clear cut explanation behind. Wait until you feel calm,don't write with anger as that would just end with blaming people. Don't be scared to actually name people as reasons if they were abusers or smt though.
If you don't leave them an explanation, they might grasp at straws trying to explain it, and blame it on some random thing you liked, or worse, themselves.
 

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