It's time to stop being idle.

[CRM]

Hey. I'm not a very active member on here, and I'm sure most of you don't even recognize me, but I just felt the need to say this, more for myself than anyone else.

I stopped coming and posting here last month, but it was just from not feeling like being here anymore. I've always just had the suicidal thoughts and the apathetic "yeah, it will happen one day," the preparations, and the dry runs, but never any attempts.

My days recently have consisted of doing nothing. I started to write an autobiography in an effort to reflect on my life and reassure myself that there is nothing left for me to live for. It will go unfinished, just like my fictional novel, and just like my natural life.

Now, I'm going to actively pursue suicide. I plan to be dead by the end of the year. This will be my last post on the forum, not counting the replies I may or may not give. I'm going to try to gather the courage to do this tonight, but the only guarantee I'm making for myself is to be dead by 2019. I'm going to try to do this every day between now and the 1st. If I can't, then I'm just going to go for full suspension hanging, where I can't back out. I refuse to suffer through another year of this. I should have been dead five years ago.

Thanks for this forum. Even though I failed to make any real connections through here, I still enjoyed reading your posts. Goodbye.

 

[Schopenhauer]

Good luck, man. Take control of your life, even if it means quitting it. Hopefully I'll be dead before 2019 arrives as well. I wish you all the best.

 

[TiredHorse]

Safe travels. I hope you find the destination a peaceful relief.

And if you don't ctb tonight, don't feel like you can't return and seek solace from the company here. I'm a newbie, but from what I've been reading it sure seems like most of us don't catch it on the first try.

 

[worldexploder]

Good luck

 

[Empty RN]

Best of luck to you. Reach out on here if you need support :)

 

[Donewith_]

Hope everything goes well for you in this..Just make sure you go with a perfectly planned reliable method..' let's figure out what happens with this' methods makes it worse to plan or do anything for further attempts . Wish you all the luck :)

 

[Jon]

I recognise you as you were quite active when I joined, and I'm sure you wrote something that caught my eye as I distinctly remember your initials, perhaps it was before I joined when I was reading through the posts. The autobiography is a good idea, like you said, to reinforce the reasons for doing so and to answer any doubts you may have before the time comes. I'm doing something similar to convince myself that death isn't anything to fear. I was thinking yesterday just how often our mind plays tricks on us, never at rest, and only through writing can our thoughts be stabilised and settled and fixed down through words. And don't worry about feeling you haven't made any real connections here, many of us haven't, so you're not alone on that either. All the best mate.

 

[Ashpac]

Hey. I'm not a very active member on here, and I'm sure most of you don't even recognize me, but I just felt the need to say this, more for myself than anyone else.

I stopped coming and posting here last month, but it was just from not feeling like being here anymore. I've always just had the suicidal thoughts and the apathetic "yeah, it will happen one day," the preparations, and the dry runs, but never any attempts.

My days recently have consisted of doing nothing. I started to write an autobiography in an effort to reflect on my life and reassure myself that there is nothing left for me to live for. It will go unfinished, just like my fictional novel, and just like my natural life.

Now, I'm going to actively pursue suicide. I plan to be dead by the end of the year. This will be my last post on the forum, not counting the replies I may or may not give. I'm going to try to gather the courage to do this tonight, but the only guarantee I'm making for myself is to be dead by 2019. I'm going to try to do this every day between now and the 1st. If I can't, then I'm just going to go for full suspension hanging, where I can't back out. I refuse to suffer through another year of this. I should have been dead five years ago.

Thanks for this forum. Even though I failed to make any real connections through here, I still enjoyed reading your posts. Goodbye.

I joined this forum 8 days after you and even though I dont recognise you that does not mean you do not matter because everyone on here matters.

Its such a shame life gives people shitty cards and alot of people are forced to end it even though many of them dont really want too they just dont want to be in pain anymore.

I hope your suffering ends soon. You deserve it just like we all deserve to be pain free.