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bl33ding_heart

bl33ding_heart

Borderline
Jun 24, 2025
159
I've gotten told by multiple different people, many times. That with the right treatment and possibly even medication I can learn to manage my bpd a lot better, and minimise the intensity of my symptoms. I'm not saying I don't entirely believe this. But what I don't believe is that everything can just get better, and I can be as happy as someone without bpd if I get help. No matter how hard I try, how good and effective the treatment I might receive will be. My bpd will always be there. Like a vengeful spirit haunting my desperate poor soul. I haven't yet gotten professional treatment, but I've tried to manage my symptoms and minimise the pain I feel on my own. Sometimes it works, and I end up in a much better state then I previously was in. But no matter what, I always end up back at square one. I always end up being the same over emotionally grotesque maniac with no self control. Desperately searching for a solution. If the rest of my life will just be an endless cycle of me bettering myself then ending up back where I begun. Then I really don't think it's worth living at all.
 
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Reactions: cloudpassingthrough, kunikuzushi, eattwinkiesseejesus and 6 others
bl33ding_heart

bl33ding_heart

Borderline
Jun 24, 2025
159
I've gotten told by multiple different people, many times. That with the right treatment and possibly even medication I can learn to manage my bpd a lot better, and minimise the intensity of my symptoms. I'm not saying I don't entirely believe this. But what I don't believe is that everything can just get better, and I can be as happy as someone without bpd if I get help. No matter how hard I try, how good and effective the treatment I might receive will be. My bpd will always be there. Like a vengeful spirit haunting my desperate poor soul. I haven't yet gotten professional treatment, but I've tried to manage my symptoms and minimise the pain I feel on my own. Sometimes it works, and I end up in a much better state then I previously was in. But no matter what, I always end up back at square one. I always end up being the same over emotionally grotesque maniac with no self control. Desperately searching for a solution. If the rest of my life will just be an endless cycle of me bettering myself then ending up back where I begun. Then I really don't think it's worth living at all.
Whoops I meant can't :p
 
eattwinkiesseejesus

eattwinkiesseejesus

Praying for death to a God that doesn't answer
Jan 18, 2025
100
I wish I knew😭 I ended up with bpd after years of abuse from my spouse and now im trying to ctb to save everyone else from this new toxic rageful me😭
Im so sorry you are living in this hell❤️‍🩹 no one deserves this
 
Ijustcantanymore

Ijustcantanymore

Student
Nov 22, 2024
180
It is true that proper treatment and meds can lessen the symptoms of bpd. And some of the behavior you will just grow out of. BPD symptoms have shown to lessen with age. (No go away, just lessen in their intensity)

It's possible you could reach contentment somewhere a long the way.

It is work living with BPD. I know. But it can improve. It just takes a lot of self awareness.
 

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