i'm too dumb to kill myself & im lonely

[etherealdemise]

all the methods require money and skill which i dont have
fuck my life
dae know if any amount of perscription prozac can kill be at least mixed with something

its so lonely. even people on the internet with my interests dont want to be my friend. something about me is inherently alien to people and i feel so fucked up because a person will be nice to me on the fucking internet once or talk about a shared interest & ill be anxious over them 24/7 and constantly stalk them. thats so isolated i feel. fuck i just want to die and id shoot myself if i could buy a gun but i dont even have a drivers license and im just 19
even if someone does like me i feel annoyed and completely revolted by them. i just wish people i found interesting to talk to would like me but im retarded so only people who like me because im somewhat "attractive" just enough to be sexually viable like me

hahahahahhahahahahaha i want to overdose on opium
sorry about the typos im currently in bed w/o my glasses

i just wish i had anyone any real human being to hold me or talk to me or care

 

[remluvr]

Holy shit this is more relatable thing ive read on here. I also get attached deeply to people and then when people like me I all of a sudden hate em its really hard to live with ngl.

Idk if you'd ever wanna talk but we r a lot alike...

 

[Slark]

all the methods require money and skill which i dont have
fuck my life
dae know if any amount of perscription prozac can kill be at least mixed with something

its so lonely. even people on the internet with my interests dont want to be my friend. something about me is inherently alien to people and i feel so fucked up because a person will be nice to me on the fucking internet once or talk about a shared interest & ill be anxious over them 24/7 and constantly stalk them. thats so isolated i feel. fuck i just want to die and id shoot myself if i could buy a gun but i dont even have a drivers license and im just 19
even if someone does like me i feel annoyed and completely revolted by them. i just wish people i found interesting to talk to would like me but im retarded so only people who like me because im somewhat "attractive" just enough to be sexually viable like me

hahahahahhahahahahaha i want to overdose on opium
sorry about the typos im currently in bed w/o my glasses

i just wish i had anyone any real human being to hold me or talk to me or care

I hope you find good friends who value you and like you. We all need to interact and feel loved. Anything you can call me to talk

 

[HumanBBQ]

all the methods require money and skill which i dont have
fuck my life
dae know if any amount of perscription prozac can kill be at least mixed with something

its so lonely. even people on the internet with my interests dont want to be my friend. something about me is inherently alien to people and i feel so fucked up because a person will be nice to me on the fucking internet once or talk about a shared interest & ill be anxious over them 24/7 and constantly stalk them. thats so isolated i feel. fuck i just want to die and id shoot myself if i could buy a gun but i dont even have a drivers license and im just 19
even if someone does like me i feel annoyed and completely revolted by them. i just wish people i found interesting to talk to would like me but im retarded so only people who like me because im somewhat "attractive" just enough to be sexually viable like me

hahahahahhahahahahaha i want to overdose on opium
sorry about the typos im currently in bed w/o my glasses

i just wish i had anyone any real human being to hold me or talk to me or care

Hey, I don't really know how to reach out to people but I came across your post and honestly feel like giving you a hug if I could. If there's a way to interact privately, I'd be happy to listen to you and maybe we could chat a little about our interests, at least to ease the pain a little. I feel lonely in my mental space too, why would I even be on this site, right? Please reply if you see this, just to know that at least you're okay. You don't have to reach out if you don't want to.
Best regards.​

 

[etherealdemise]

Hey, I don't really know how to reach out to people but I came across your post and honestly feel like giving you a hug if I could. If there's a way to interact privately, I'd be happy to listen to you and maybe we could chat a little about our interests, at least to ease the pain a little. I feel lonely in my mental space too, why would I even be on this site, right? Please reply if you see this, just to know that at least you're okay. You don't have to reach out if you don't want to.
Best regards.​

pretty sure if you press on my profile it should give you a little envelope icon or something since i have my dms set to open. and thanks, yeah we are all on the same boat on here.

 

[HumanBBQ]

pretty sure if you press on my profile it should give you a little envelope icon or something since i have my dms set to open. and thanks, yeah we are all on the same boat on here.

I can't find it, maybe because I'm on desktop. I'll try to find it on my phone but see if you can message me instead.

 

[etherealdemise]

I can't find it, maybe because I'm on desktop. I'll try to find it on my phone but see if you can message me instead.

it wont let me. i think you might have the default settings which allow no one to message. I'm on phone & all you have to do there is press the envelope icon and in the bottom of the popup it will show you an option to start a new conversation.

 

[rebelnow111]

all the methods require money and skill which i dont have
fuck my life
dae know if any amount of perscription prozac can kill be at least mixed with something

its so lonely. even people on the internet with my interests dont want to be my friend. something about me is inherently alien to people and i feel so fucked up because a person will be nice to me on the fucking internet once or talk about a shared interest & ill be anxious over them 24/7 and constantly stalk them. thats so isolated i feel. fuck i just want to die and id shoot myself if i could buy a gun but i dont even have a drivers license and im just 19
even if someone does like me i feel annoyed and completely revolted by them. i just wish people i found interesting to talk to would like me but im retarded so only people who like me because im somewhat "attractive" just enough to be sexually viable like me

hahahahahhahahahahaha i want to overdose on opium
sorry about the typos im currently in bed w/o my glasses

i just wish i had anyone any real human being to hold me or talk to me or care

i know the feeling so many people are so cruel and only very interested in others who do very well in life

 

[1043169]

I feel similar. I try to make friends but they don't really care. It's hard.

 

[circus22]

Same. The methods seem so complicated and it's hard to find the materials. I'm too dumb for this

 

[Timothy7dff]

Suicide has existed for thousands of years. People in the past didn't use modern chemicals or methods

 

[temporal_anchorite]

I promise you, a high degree of intellectual prowess is not required in order to successfully off yourself lol
You could be the most retarded cognitively impaired down syndrome ass mfer and still find a way

Aside from that, you sound a lot like me. Regardless of what community or social circle I find myself, it seems like people have some sort of built-in radar system that can detect that I'm fundamentally different from the rest of them. This form of loneliness & isolation can easily eat you alive and it seems impossible to completely dispel.

 

[sugarb]

all the methods require money and skill which i dont have
fuck my life
dae know if any amount of perscription prozac can kill be at least mixed with something

its so lonely. even people on the internet with my interests dont want to be my friend. something about me is inherently alien to people and i feel so fucked up because a person will be nice to me on the fucking internet once or talk about a shared interest & ill be anxious over them 24/7 and constantly stalk them. thats so isolated i feel. fuck i just want to die and id shoot myself if i could buy a gun but i dont even have a drivers license and im just 19
even if someone does like me i feel annoyed and completely revolted by them. i just wish people i found interesting to talk to would like me but im retarded so only people who like me because im somewhat "attractive" just enough to be sexually viable like me

hahahahahhahahahahaha i want to overdose on opium
sorry about the typos im currently in bed w/o my glasses

i just wish i had anyone any real human being to hold me or talk to me or care

Dude I'm also super retarded, wear glasses, am (very soon) 19 and don't have a driver's license we're twinsies
I'll talk to you if you want, dunno if our interests will be the same but I'm occasionally funny

I promise you, a high degree of intellectual prowess is not required in order to successfully off yourself lol
You could be the most retarded cognitively impaired down syndrome ass mfer and still find a way

Aside from that, you sound a lot like me. Regardless of what community or social circle I find myself, it seems like people have some sort of built-in radar system that can detect that I'm fundamentally different from the rest of them. This form of loneliness & isolation can easily eat you alive and it seems impossible to completely dispel.

That first paragraph made me snort

 

[etherealdemise]

I promise you, a high degree of intellectual prowess is not required in order to successfully off yourself lol
You could be the most retarded cognitively impaired down syndrome ass mfer and still find a way

Aside from that, you sound a lot like me. Regardless of what community or social circle I find myself, it seems like people have some sort of built-in radar system that can detect that I'm fundamentally different from the rest of them. This form of loneliness & isolation can easily eat you alive and it seems impossible to completely dispel.

try being unable to find your carotid artery or leave the house for some retarded reason. my moms always watching me in case i attempt i cant do shit

Dude I'm also super retarded, wear glasses, am (very soon) 19 and don't have a driver's license we're twinsies
I'll talk to you if you want, dunno if our interests will be the same but I'm occasionally funny

That first paragraph made me snort

lets talk - i mean what have we got to lose, really. we're on this site.

Suicide has existed for thousands of years. People in the past didn't use modern chemicals or methods

id drown myself if i could but things are so safe these days

 

[Randy Savage]

I relate to this a lot. I'm 19 and previously had issues with always wanting to be around online friends.
I think you should place a little less importance on and re-do your approach with what is happening online. It would save you so much heartache. Online spaces like discord and twitter are practically based on pre-existing friend groups so, don't feel bad if it takes awhile to meet someone you who you find interesting. Take your time, view people's socials before you decide to interact, and don't get discouraged if it takes awhile for someone who genuinely gets you to show up. When you find that person, they will mean 100x more to you than the time you spent looking for them.

I'm sorry you're going through these feelings. Be gentle with yourself and please give yourself time to grow and change before you make the decision to CTB.

 

[Sarros]

Felt that. I got my SN a couple years ago through dumb luck. But I'm too retarded to acquire any of the other substances in the regiment. So I'll probably just end up throwing it up and unable to attempt again.