Venting i'm scared

[nikolaigogol]

tw : assault and violence

last night my boyfriend assaulted me and i've never felt more suicidal in my life. he punched me in the head, pulled my hair, kicked me in the stomach, scratched my arms until they bled and broke one of my fingers. he was drunk when he did it and apologized profusely once the alcohol started to wear off but god i just feel so... disgusting. worthless. the whole time i wanted to run out and enact my suicide plan. i wish he killed me instead of leaving me in all of this pain. i want to die. but i'm too scared to do it myself. i wish he killed me.

 

[rotten_hrtz]

tw: agresión y violencia

Anoche mi novio me agredió y nunca me he sentido más suicida en mi vida. Me dio un puñetazo en la cabeza, me tiró del pelo, me pateó en el estómago, me arañó los brazos hasta que sangraron y me rompió un dedo. Estaba borracho cuando lo hizo y se disculpó profusamente una vez que el alcohol comenzó a pasarme, pero Dios, me siento tan... repugnante. Inútil. Todo el tiempo quise salir corriendo y poner en práctica mi plan de suicidio. Desearía que me matara en lugar de dejarme con todo este dolor. Quiero morir. Pero tengo demasiado miedo de hacerlo yo misma. Desearía que me matara.

Lamento mucho que hayas tenido que pasar por eso. Disculpa si esta pregunta te incomoda, pero ¿has considerado denunciar a tu novio? Lo que te hizo es horrible y no debería quedar impune

 

[unluckysadness]

Oh my God it's so heartbreaking and horrible I hope you'll find peace

 

[nikolaigogol]

Lamento mucho que hayas tenido que pasar por eso. Disculpa si esta pregunta te incomoda, pero ¿has considerado denunciar a tu novio? Lo que te hizo es horrible y no debería quedar impune

he is already going to a psychiatric facility at the end of the month. i just have to wait a few more days until he can get some help for all of this.

 

[alstroemeria55]

That's awful, you did not deserve this in any way. Alcohol is not an excuse, things like this can only get worse... I hope you leave him and find peace, someone who actually loves you.

 

[rotten_hrtz]

he is already going to a psychiatric facility at the end of the month. i just have to wait a few more days until he can get some help for all of this.

I understand, what he did to you is truly horrible and nothing excuses it. I hope you can recover from it <3

 

[soul2realm]

tw : assault and violence

last night my boyfriend assaulted me and i've never felt more suicidal in my life. he punched me in the head, pulled my hair, kicked me in the stomach, scratched my arms until they bled and broke one of my fingers. he was drunk when he did it and apologized profusely once the alcohol started to wear off but god i just feel so... disgusting. worthless. the whole time i wanted to run out and enact my suicide plan. i wish he killed me instead of leaving me in all of this pain. i want to die. but i'm too scared to do it myself. i wish he killed me.

Why, What!! are you still doing there?? Get out and stop this suicidal thing. If you want to ctb then do on your own terms not because you are a victim of some abuse. I mean i don't know what to say here.
I do understand issues crop up amongst partners but it should never come to hurting each other.
If you really want change first get rid off the alcohol from both your life.
If he cares about you and the same goes for you then goodbye to the weaknesses. Then try to talk to each other.
But right now, get some medical help, move out if possible for a few days and give each other some space.
Come on guys, the amount of courage it takes to CTB is huge compared to giving your situation one more chance.
Lots of blessings and love to you. Please take care