i’m having physical anxiety symptoms since i’ve started planning

[sleepingowl55]

i've had suicidal ideation for a long time, but i've only started really planning it about a month ago. i decided to go with full suspension hanging. the other option would be a verapamil + amitriptyline overdose, but i have stomach problems and fear of throwing up. now i've realized that whenever i think of the moment of ctb i get a super fast heart beat, tremors, clammy skin, lightheadedness, etc. i know that full hanging is a really reliable method, but i'm getting more and more anxious just thinking about it. maybe a small dose of clonazepam about 10 minutes before ctb will help this feeling? but i don't know what to do in between now the moment of ctb. i also fear the pain and if it'll take too long until i get unconscious.

 

[ankawannadie]

Maybe it's not the time. I never had an attempt before but I think that intense physical symptoms will be absent when you're ready. I'm not exactly sure though.

 

[Dejected 55]

I'm not having anxiety about planning... I am slightly worried that when the day comes I might have a lot of anxiety. I admit my failings and I feel like the struggle will become more real on the day of... but until then, it is just theory in my mind and not reality.

 

[Freedomm]

i've had suicidal ideation for a long time, but i've only started really planning it about a month ago. i decided to go with full suspension hanging. the other option would be a verapamil + amitriptyline overdose, but i have stomach problems and fear of throwing up. now i've realized that whenever i think of the moment of ctb i get a super fast heart beat, tremors, clammy skin, lightheadedness, etc. i know that full hanging is a really reliable method, but i'm getting more and more anxious just thinking about it. maybe a small dose of clonazepam about 10 minutes before ctb will help this feeling? but i don't know what to do in between now the moment of ctb. i also fear the pain and if it'll take too long until i get unconscious.

I agree. I think it's the SI. I'm getting a little nervous.

 

[Off_Switch]

I'm not having anxiety about planning... I am slightly worried that when the day comes I might have a lot of anxiety. I admit my failings and I feel like the struggle will become more real on the day of... but until then, it is just theory in my mind and not reality.

Honestly, I don't think more than 1% of people here on SS will ever be able to do it. This is because statistically-speaking, only 0.01% the world's population dies by CTB every year. There has to be way more than that who want to. My theory is that most people don't have the brain physiology to do it. I suspect that the people who are successfully able to do it have an irregular hippocampus and/or amygdala that dampens their fear levels.

Hippocampal neuropathology in suicide: Gaps in our knowledge and opportunities for a breakthrough

Suicide is a major global hazard. There is a need for increasing suicide awareness and effective and evidence-based interventions, targeting both suic…

www.sciencedirect.com

These might be the same type of people that participate in other fearless activities such as free-climbing mountains and cave diving.

So unfortunately, this means that almost all of us will be condemned to anxiously suffer, until we die by a means that is beyond our voluntary control. And the thought of not being able to do it gives me more suffocating anxiety than actually doing it probably ever would.

 

[sleepingowl55]

Honestly, I don't think more than 1% of people here on SS will ever be able to do it. This is because statistically-speaking, only 0.01% the world's population dies by CTB every year. There has to be way more than that who want to. My theory is that most people don't have the brain physiology to do it. I suspect that the people who are successfully able to do it have an irregular hippocampus and/or amygdala that dampens their fear levels.

Hippocampal neuropathology in suicide: Gaps in our knowledge and opportunities for a breakthrough

Suicide is a major global hazard. There is a need for increasing suicide awareness and effective and evidence-based interventions, targeting both suic…

www.sciencedirect.com

These might be the same type of people that participate in other fearless activities such as free-climbing mountains and cave diving.

So unfortunately, this means that almost all of us will be condemned to anxiously suffer, until we die by a means that is beyond our voluntary control. And the thought of not being able to do it gives me more suffocating anxiety than actually doing it probably ever would.

your comment made me more anxious lol
but yeah, you're right. in my case the % is a bit higher because I have BPD, but still… I really hope i'll be able to ctb