Venting I really don't like life in general, i hate trying to convince myself its not that way

[_Minsk]

I've come to the place where everything seems pointless, why should i continue?
i've lost my passion for life, my energy.. i know why i am still here, but honestly,

i have no power left due to my struggles, each time, when it seems like i could fix
something which bothered me for a long time, something which causes me the

same amount of pain comes to me again, just with another label..


i have dreams, but life is taking them one by one.. and if i found something,
either i lose my motivation and fun on it, or something forces me to stop it.

one example is sports, i loved it, and i loved the fact that i was doing something,
which was seen by society, as, something 'good'. then over the time, my body

developed a chronic pain condition, since that i had to stop it, it was my life
my "lifestyle" it magically cured all my issues, self esteem, motivation, unhealthy habits,
and much more..

society is praising you for doing 'good', or 'healthy' stuff, stuff which is seen by most
people as desirable.. but it also judges you if you don't, or at least your brain does,
which leads to the same.. it sucks, i wish we had the power to cure ourselves,
feeling the way we want, just by thinking about the thing we want..

this life is total crap, there are so many pathogen bacteria, viruses, chronic diseases,
even following your cravings like sex can lead you catching hiv or other horrible problems,
ruining your life within seconds. im so sorry for those who suffer from it, its so likely that
you will look back at your old life, blaming yourself for that one thing, which changed your
life forever.. im doing the same, just for other things, even tho i know thats how life is,
and horrible things can happen to everyone.. i dont have hiv, other horrible things like bipolar,
cancer, schizophrenia, but i hate the fact that life is so random and bad things can happen
every time to anyone...

i think im escaping more and more in my imaginary world, daydreaming of a better world..

i feel like this life is completely pointless for me, it sucks completely and im still faking
and lying to myself, trying to convince myself that this life is 'ok'.. i hate it......

sorry for that weird text but i've come to that point where i dont care anymore, i just want to get
everything out of my head...:(

 

[Life sucks]

Life isn't ok at all and filled with problems. Even if we try to solve them, more appear and we keep struggling to the end. Life itself actually is a problem and we can't control it, for example time flow makes everything deteriorates and its out of our control. Additionally, this biological body and the whole biochemistry is a stupid bad game and lead to inevitable suffering.

Of course, there are some distractions and stuff we love but life and specially time kills it.

Thats why life sucks