I miss having community/social connection

[MISCname7896]

I've been agoraphobic for years because of complex PTSD and I'm generally afraid of being hurt emotionally/physically by other people. I've been in therapy for it for about a year but progress is slow (tangible, but slow). One of the most painful things about my condition is not having any sense of community or close friends I can talk to; I love people and enjoy having them in my life but it feels so difficult to do so with how I currently live. Can anyone suggest some possible solutions to my problem? It's not an easy one to solve so I'd understand if there wasn't much that can be said here.

 

[AbsentMindedHuman]

If you think about it, growing up and leaving school is done very poorly and I think it leads to a lot of suffering. As kids and young adults (age 6-18) we go to school and see friends, teachers, me mentors, and community and then one day you graduate and suddenly it's all taken away.

I'm attachment avoidant and an introvert so I have a hard time reaching out or meeting new people. The only way to make connections for me it seems is work but thats not a great option. Human connection these days seems fleeting and just out of reach for me.

 

[Life_and_Death]

we go to school and see friends, teachers, me mentors, and community and then one day you graduate and suddenly it's all taken away.

and then you go to work, do community volunteer work, join hobby groups and find more people.
i dont see how it failed us, when its the same thing just a little less forced.

 

[Grimpoteuthis]

That is why I relapse into being terminally online and I wish it is easy for me to just "join your local group!", "start volunteering!", "go to social events!". The ability to stay anonymous and ease of jumping from one conversation to another on internet communities makes socializing a less draining activity and satisfies my need to belong to a community. I am ashamed to admit that almost all the close relationships I have ever had formed online.

 

[Eternal Eyes]

I volunteer. I hate it! It's probably the main catalyst why I'm here. The project is full of toxicity and internal drama, the minute someone isn't in listening distance they get smack talked. The lack of structure in the project means it's a nightmare to be involved in. Communication due to the fractured nature of the team is none-existent which frequently leads to wasted time, or things either getting done twice or not getting done at all. I feel like no one there knows me (I've been called Martin, Mattie, Olly, none are my real names!), in fact, most people don't even know my last name. I usually just do my obligations then sit on my own.

It's not the same as school, and nothing like the actually deep friendships that I've only had online. The only reason I stay there is I personally gain from it (I mean, it is my hobby I'm volunteering it) and I don't mind the chairman. That's all.

 

[RoseGarden]

I remember a time when every public space wasn't monetized to shit, and the ones that were I could afford. Now the zoo is over $100 for the day. The malls are dying. The parks are overflowing with trash. The only places to do anything anymore are at home. It fucking sucks