
cowplantabduction
Beam me up, Scotty
- Jul 21, 2025
- 20
I look at my former classmates on Facebook...they completed their degrees, have good careers, married to someone they love, all things I want so so so badly. I wish that could be me.
When I say I want to die it's not the whole truth...I only want to die because this is my life. If I was lucky enough to be born to good parents, have money, support, not be so mentally ill I can't drive or work, I'd want to live.
I feel so much grief and despair for a life I'll never live. Every moment that I stay alive is just me clinging on to the desperate hope that maybe someday the life I want will be mine. But I know I won't get to see it, my life is already crumbling around me and I'm becoming homeless by the end of this month with nowhere to go. Death feels like a preferable option at this rate.
When I say I want to die it's not the whole truth...I only want to die because this is my life. If I was lucky enough to be born to good parents, have money, support, not be so mentally ill I can't drive or work, I'd want to live.
I feel so much grief and despair for a life I'll never live. Every moment that I stay alive is just me clinging on to the desperate hope that maybe someday the life I want will be mine. But I know I won't get to see it, my life is already crumbling around me and I'm becoming homeless by the end of this month with nowhere to go. Death feels like a preferable option at this rate.