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amy joyce

amy joyce

Member
May 2, 2026
24
This occurred to me because I know there are quite a few people who attempt suicide that don't really want to die. They are screaming for help and because they're hurting make a half ass attempt.

I also wonder what the actual death rate is of people who post here about wanting to die. Is there a buddy recommendation or rule that if you decide to finalize your decision you let them know so some kind of tracking can be made? I think that would be a good idea. This is a particular dark subject and suggestion but I'm curious how many people really don't want to die but post about it for whatever reason between a person laugh to believing they do only to realize it was a lackadaisical thought they became obsessed about.
 
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W

wine is fine but

whiskey's quicker
Jul 26, 2025
252
it seems there are many members who have died, and some who have been saved, which considering the method many of those used, is a very risky way to get attention. one method is pretty much guaranteed, and if not found within around 40 minutes, there is no hope of being saved

i certainly hope at least one of them was a cop, a troll or just anything else, but sadly we will never know with most of them
 
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houseofleaves

houseofleaves

how's life treating ya?
Jan 14, 2022
625
How many people here are trolling or pretending they want to die for attention? This occurred to me because I know there are quite a few people who attempt suicide that don't really want to die. They are screaming for help and because they're hurting make a half ass attempt.
Imho, not much. Making a half-assed attempt does not require researching a forum dedicated to quite the opposite: not making a half-assed attempt.

I also wonder what the actual death rate is of people who post here about wanting to die.
It does not matter. Some people come here in their worst moments, when they absolutely want to die, really do. But talking to others who understand them or just posting about their feelings without the all-prevaling censorship of traditional social media helps them feel a bit better and continue living. It does not mean their feelings are fake.

Is there a buddy recommendation or rule that if you decide to finalize your decision you let them know so some kind of tracking can be made? I think that would be a good idea.
No, and enforcing this rule would be impossible and weird.
 
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bl33ding_heart

bl33ding_heart

Borderline
Jun 24, 2025
472
I genuinely wonder this too. I do believe majority of the people here are genuinely suffering. But at least a few are just edgelords. This may sound weird but I sent a friend of mine one of my posts on here a while back and he made an account on here just to stalk me. This dude is known for being an internet troll, and I noticed beyond stalking me he was also interacting with other people here. I don't know what exactly his intentions are with other people. I seriously regret ever introducing him to this site, and I didn't think sending him one of my posts here would warrantee something like this. đź’€
 
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SASU-KE

SASU-KE

Warlock
Nov 26, 2025
721
Situations vary. There are people who want to commit but have a very high SI. They simply can't overcome it.

There are some who are extremely suicidal at one point and then change their minds because circumstances get better. Most on this particular site are definitely depressed or suicidal, but some also want to recover.

But yes, there are bad actors as well of course. But they are the minority.
 
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W

wine is fine but

whiskey's quicker
Jul 26, 2025
252
I genuinely wonder this too. I do believe majority of the people here are genuinely suffering
i wish everyone was faking it - it is sad enough reading some of the stories, but when someone you have had contact with leaves, it is devastating


I seriously regret ever introducing him to this site, and I didn't think sending him one of my posts here would warrantee something like this. đź’€
nothing warrants that kind of abysmal behaviour. everyone needs to be very, very careful who we let in on our suicidal thoughts. for the most part, no good can ever come from letting anyone know just how we feel

sadly, if we do learn at all, we tend to only learn from our own mistakes. the best way to learn is from other people's mistakes and use their experience, but we as humans do not tend to do that. even those who "know" better still fall into the same trap time and time again. perhaps it is because life loves a tragedy, or maybe we just get so consumed in what is happening, that we miss the obvious signs. it is always so much easier looking from the point of view of a detached person
 
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hurts2b

hurts2b

Tired
Mar 14, 2026
175
Not totally sure what you mean. Just because not everyone who has suicidal thoughts goes through with it, that doesn't mean they're secretly disingenuous or unserious. It's not an easy decision (and a lot of us are stuck going back and forth about it).
Failed/half ass attempts can be cries for help, but they can also be "practice" for real attempts and an effort to overcome survival instinct. Finally, someone changing their mind later doesn't retroactively cancel out their suicidal thoughts, feelings and instincts. Regardless of what happens in the end, it's best to believe people when they say that they want to die.

A buddy/tracking system would likely open this place up to all kinds of legal trouble.

To your point though I've definitely had a troll under one of my posts and have seen this person under other people's posts too. Calling people losers retarded and the like.
I'm not too bothered though. I think this person must've been pretty young.
Regardless. If we're all losers, then it follows the trolls are losers too.
 
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pax420

pax420

We take rohypnol and just forget it all
Jan 19, 2026
140
I'm not judging anybody on here. We are all here for one reason or another and deserve the respect as everybody else. Actually I wish nobody hated their life enough to end it but here we are. As far as a buddy tracking system?!?! Wtf! I guess next you'll want us to live stream the ctb for proof.
 
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W

wine is fine but

whiskey's quicker
Jul 26, 2025
252
As far as a buddy tracking system?!?! Wtf! I guess next you'll want us to live stream the ctb for proof.
she is very new here, but tragically lost a child to suicide recently, hence she is now looking to it for herself. she is also wondering if her son had an account here. most probably that has led to a suggestion that many here find to be un-necessary

we all have thoughts that seem weird to others, but at present, she is in the unenviable situation of being on both sides of the suicide fence. she has had a devasting loss, and also considering it for herself which will mean sometimes her posts seem to be pro (her) suicide, and others pro life. lastly, just like with any parent who has suffered such a tragedy, she seems to be feeling that her son didn't really want to die, but maybe did it because he backed himself into a corner and no one stopped him. this example might be totally wrong, but it is just a extension of the fact, she seems to believe her son did not want to die, and also seems to be the reason for this thread about whether or not people here really do wish to die or not. her life has been turned upside down and will never be the same or upright again, and she is trying to make some sense, where sadly, no sense can probably ever be made
 
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SASU-KE

SASU-KE

Warlock
Nov 26, 2025
721
also wonder what the actual death rate is of people who post here about wanting to die
It's actually pretty high. I know a lot of people here who have passed away. Some of them were close friends of mine as well. It's one of the reasons I'm reluctant to make more friends here. The loss takes a huge toll.

But nothing really compares to your loss. You must be suffering immensely right now. I'm so sorry. I hope you can heal. Grieve your son, but slowly heal and get better.

When my mother died a little while ago, my first instinct was to catch the bus, but then I thought that if I passed away, who would grieve her? The dead deserve someone to grieve and mourn them.I hope things slowly get better for you, because the burden you're bearing cannot be held for too long either.
 
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W

wine is fine but

whiskey's quicker
Jul 26, 2025
252
It's actually pretty high. I know a lot of people here who have passed away. Some of them were close friends of mine as well. It's one of the reasons I'm reluctant to make more friends here. The loss takes a huge toll.
it can be and is immeasurable
i am embarrassed to admit this to even myself, because it feels so wrong, but losing someone here who i had never met, was never going to meet, and had limited contact with has hurt so much more than actually losing a friend just before the member here went
maybe that kind of devastation is good, because at present, i have no doubts at all, that if did die by my own hand soon, the place where i work would almost certainly send for a welfare check, if not on the first day i didn't show up but definitely on the second, so at least my loved ones would not have to find me. sadly, polishing the dull side is one of my strengths :pfff:;-;
 
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LilGhost

LilGhost

Shark
Apr 8, 2026
53
This occurred to me because I know there are quite a few people who attempt suicide that don't really want to die. They are screaming for help and because they're hurting make a half ass attempt.

I also wonder what the actual death rate is of people who post here about wanting to die. Is there a buddy recommendation or rule that if you decide to finalize your decision you let them know so some kind of tracking can be made? I think that would be a good idea. This is a particular dark subject and suggestion but I'm curious how many people really don't want to die but post about it for whatever reason between a person laugh to believing they do only to realize it was a lackadaisical thought they became obsessed about.
Well... I assume since you are new here, you misinterpreted this website goal. It is not pro ctb website, it is pro-choice. This website accepts the decision you are about to make and provides you resources for both ctb and recovery. Some people here only for the resources on how to end things, some are looking for the community that accepts and understands, some want to get better. Wanting to die is not in particular standard for a human being. Like, people want to be saved and thats okay. I dont know, your message sounded very weird and condescending like "pretending they want to die for attention". Maybe its just me projecting and seeing an elephant in an empty room, it just sounded for me like a) not believing a person who wants to ctb and being like "if you want to do so, why are you still here", b) being passive aggressive towards such people. Like "people sh for attention" mindset.
As for tracking, its violation of privacy. I am planning to leave a small note right before my ctb, but it doesnt mean that people should feel forced to do so.
P.S. small suggestion is to check under what forum you post. Like this one would rather belong in ctb discussion or offtopic, but 100% not in recovery. Recovery is for people who wishes to get better, I dunno, again maybe its just because of the
Example. Before my last attempt, my psychologist said "well you dont look like you will ctb very soon", so I had to prove them wrong ^^. Or my sister not taking my cries for help seriously, cause I never told her about my previous ctb attempts
, I found the message you sent very uncomfortable, so I would assume it could accidentally trigger someone who is here to feel better, so it is better to check where do you post to avoiid it (imho).
Anyway. I hope you will figure your stuff out!
 
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amy joyce

amy joyce

Member
May 2, 2026
24
LilGhost I am fairly new. I don't understand all/most of the acronyms. It's hard for me to figure out which sub forum I'm in or how to respond. I'm also not familiar with the reply/quote function. I do apologize for any kind of discomfort I've caused anyone from my error.

I would actually prefer to delete this thread entirely since the subject isn't nearly as important to me as the feelings of people I may have hurt. However I also don't know how and at the same time don't want to disregard people who took the time and to respond.
As far as a buddy tracking system?!?! Wtf! I guess next you'll want us to live stream the ctb for proof.

Sarcasm is uncalled for. My point was misunderstood. A Buddy system (old time member with newer member) could help people learn what the site is intended for (as LilGhost mentioned and I'm still not entirely sure of) and how to navigate without making to many mistakes and feeling foolish. As to the mention of "tracking", that was intended entirely from the pov of having an interest in how many people receive help. That could obviously be seen from from two completely different perspectives. Something I'm not used to.
 
Proceed

Proceed

Member
Dec 16, 2025
81
I have seen people like that floating around online so some are bound to end up here.
 
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amy joyce

amy joyce

Member
May 2, 2026
24
It's actually pretty high. I know a lot of people here who have passed away. Some of them were close friends of mine as well. It's one of the reasons I'm reluctant to make more friends here. The loss takes a huge toll.
I'm truly sorry for your losses. I've been in a similar situation where i knew making friends would cause pain in the long run. Sadly I was correct and it hurt in the end, but I'm grateful it didn't end in death. That is the ultimate tragedy. Peace.


she is very new here, but tragically lost a child to suicide recently, hence she is now looking to it for herself. she is also wondering
Thank you for explaining this in a way I'm unable to now, along with the support you have shown me.

It was overwhelming before and grew since finding this site. I'm stuck between wanting to help save people from themselves to also wanting help finding my best way out, all the while knowing I'll likely hurt many people. Some were just as hurt as I by my sons choice. This is a considerable mind-bend.

How it led me to another venture that seems to have angered or possibly hurt some.... perhaps that eludes to my personality. I want to be so much more than I am and in doing so move too quickly. My thanks and apologies.
I have seen people like that floating around online so some are bound to end up here.
Which wasn't meant to shame anyone struggling. But trolls are always a problem and if I were to more learned and active here, I'd want to dispel of them in some way.
 
W

wine is fine but

whiskey's quicker
Jul 26, 2025
252
Thank you for explaining this in a way I'm unable to now, along with the support you have shown me.

It was overwhelming before and grew since finding this site. I'm stuck between wanting to help save people from themselves to also wanting help finding my best way out, all the while knowing I'll likely hurt many people. Some were just as hurt as I by my sons choice. This is a considerable mind-bend.

How it led me to another venture that seems to have angered or possibly hurt some.... perhaps that eludes to my personality. I want to be so much more than I am and in doing so move too quickly. My thanks and apologies
you are welcome - you are in a horrible situation, and at the very least, should be cut some slack at times

i personally didn't see anything wrong with your post, nor with all but one of the replies. however, i could not understand how someone could find it "uncomfortable" simply because to me, it is obvious that there are two ways to look at your post, so why not try and look at both sides before criticising someone. the fact it should have been obvious you are new here and your reason for being here was in that actual post, would mean you would not have posted it in a particular section to be malicious. sadly, the basic idea of the forum would suggest there are many people struggling in one way or another, so sometimes a post, or some of the replies may seem to be puncturing the outer edges of the polite envelope, but we should all be big kids now, and cutting someone slack at times is a nice and compassionate thing to do :)



Some were just as hurt as I by my sons choice. This is a considerable mind-bend.
this will get me another report, but there is no way that your post could have hurt anyone a fraction as much as what you are going through

but please understand one thing - i am not trying to guilt trip you, but your younger son needs his mum. you still have to do what is right for you, and i totally understand if your wish to leave this world makes you underestimate how much he does need you, but you will be very much missed if you go ahead with your potential plans. sorry, i am not trying to make anything harder for you. you have already been through so much and most of us would be questioning our desire to stay in your situation
 
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amy joyce

amy joyce

Member
May 2, 2026
24
it's best to believe people when they say that they want to die.
Yes but it puts people in bad situations too. I noticed a few people state that the psych ward was out of the question. I've been there more time than I'd like to admit. It brought peace a couple of times but I'm no longer in a place that I can do that. I'd most certainly try ending it all before going back.... All of that puts caregivers in a rough situation I'm afraid.


To your point though I've definitely had a troll under one of my posts
Gosh I'm in the middle regarding between tolerating a troll. I can in other circumstances. However the serious nature of these discussions, having a troll comment could turn out disastrous for someone looking for a painless end. We all have to be mindful of our associations and not blame others for our own feelings. Even if they deserve it, ultimately we are the only people who have to deal with them.
 
LilGhost

LilGhost

Shark
Apr 8, 2026
53
LilGhost I am fairly new. I don't understand all/most of the acronyms. It's hard for me to figure out which sub forum I'm in or how to respond. I'm also not familiar with the reply/quote function. I do apologize for any kind of discomfort I've caused anyone from my error.

I would actually prefer to delete this thread entirely since the subject isn't nearly as important to me as the feelings of people I may have hurt. However I also don't know how and at the same time don't want to disregard people who took the time and to respond.


Sarcasm is uncalled for. My point was misunderstood. A Buddy system (old time member with newer member) could help people learn what the site is intended for (as LilGhost mentioned and I'm still not entirely sure of) and how to navigate without making to many mistakes and feeling foolish. As to the mention of "tracking", that was intended entirely from the pov of having an interest in how many people receive help. That could obviously be seen from from two completely different perspectives. Something I'm not used to.
All good, Im glad that's just a miscommunication, just wanted to explain how some (like me) might saw your post, so there is no hard feelings behind it ^^. I appreciate the apology tho.
I also don't think that you can delete this discussion, so I understand
As for acronyms- ctb is
sui cide
which can also be interpreted as "catch the bus"

You can know what forum you are posting on, depending on which one did you click the last (there are four main forums you can post on: suggestions (in Information)

In SaSu (acronym for the two words the website named as) there are three other forums (as shown on attached screenshot1), The names are pretty self-explanatory. When you choose to post a thread, you can see right below the button what forum are you in (like screenshot2)

If you know what forum you want to post from you can do so from the main page by pressing "post a thread" button like screenshot3

First one - ctb discussion is for advices or any ctb related discussions like: "what would be your to-do list before you are gone" thread.
Second - Recovery. For people who are trying to survive, for example stop sh
self inflicted ha rm
or some resources to get will to live

Last one - offtopic - anything that is not applicable above. Like "yall favorite games"

Now explaing more about SaSu. Your body is your choice. In cases of some people (like lots of us who are here), there is to much suffering to deal with. Lots of governments dont provide you with actual help or the help you can get is to expensive to be able to afford. But people shall not suffer. This website is here for broken souls like us, those who seek being understand (as if you try to talk about ctb with any professional, you might get quickly locked up and mental hospitals at least where I live are just here to keep you alive, not to make you get better or just get mis understanded and treated poorly). This website is a community to unite people with same problem. For me, thats the only online space where im not scared to post, due to getting bunch of death threats in other communities almost just for existing.
I had 3 previous ctb attempts. Two of them impacted my health pretty badly and were hella painful, but using this website I hopefully will either find some will to live, either finally have success with less pain ^^. If a person wants to di e - they will do it regardless of having resources. Imagine this website as a culinary book: you can check both chocolate cake recipe and jelly recipe. What product are you going to make is entirely your choice, but the book is here to give you any recipe you wish for, so you know good and bad sides of cooking process of dishes you are choosing from. So SaSu is a culinary book. Freedom of the information and stuff ^^
Like what SaSu itself says about it: https://sanctioned-suicide.net/threads/dismantling-the-allegation-that-were-pro-suicide.157256/

P.s. Wanted to answer before I forget, but Im in a middle of my migraine getting worser, so I apologize if my above text is confusing, you can ask any questions you have, Im ready to answer within my capabilities
you are welcome - you are in a horrible situation, and at the very least, should be cut some slack at times

i personally didn't see anything wrong with your post, nor with all but one of the replies. however, i could not understand how someone could find it "uncomfortable" simply because to me, it is obvious that there are two ways to look at your post, so why not try and look at both sides before criticising someone. the fact it should have been obvious you are new here and your reason for being here was in that actual post, would mean you would not have posted it in a particular section to be malicious. sadly, the basic idea of the forum would suggest there are many people struggling in one way or another, so sometimes a post, or some of the replies may seem to be puncturing the outer edges of the polite envelope, but we should all be big kids now, and cutting someone slack at times is a nice and compassionate thing to do :)




this will get me another report, but there is no way that your post could have hurt anyone a fraction as much as what you are going through

but please understand one thing - i am not trying to guilt trip you, but your younger son needs his mum. you still have to do what is right for you, and i totally understand if your wish to leave this world makes you underestimate how much he does need you, but you will be very much missed if you go ahead with your potential plans. sorry, i am not trying to make anything harder for you. you have already been through so much and most of us would be questioning our desire to stay in your situation
You are probably mentioning my reply. My intention wasnt to shame or to blame. I understood that this person is new here and my intentions were to explain the wrong choice of the sections - quote: "I would assume it could ACCIDENTALLY trigger someone who is here to feel better, so it is better to check where do you post to avoid it (imho).". . Because if I was in a same situation, I would like to know that i posted not where I intended to, so I can make another actions.
Now for, you dont understand "how someone could find it uncomfortable". We all are different kind of beings,
 

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amy joyce

amy joyce

Member
May 2, 2026
24
you can ask any questions you have, Im ready to answer within my capabilities
I'm glad we were able to bury the hatchet so to speak and understand each other.

Also thank you for the explanation and offer. *I'm lucky migraines aren't on my list of ailments.

I plan on taking you up on that, perhaps as I go on because I'm unsure how long I'll be around. I want to get physically well enough to move on as well as find a way to cope. If I can't I want to make my decision before I'm incapable of following through on my own terms. For however long I do spend here I want to understand maneuvering my way around. Unlike how it would have been to my son, the tech part is daunting to me. *I'm US and on a different time zone.
 
LilGhost

LilGhost

Shark
Apr 8, 2026
53
I'm glad we were able to bury the hatchet so to speak and understand each other.

Also thank you for the explanation and offer. *I'm lucky migraines aren't on my list of ailments.

I plan on taking you up on that, perhaps as I go on because I'm unsure how long I'll be around. I want to get physically well enough to move on as well as find a way to cope. If I can't I want to make my decision before I'm incapable of following through on my own terms. For however long I do spend here I want to understand maneuvering my way around. Unlike how it would have been to my son, the tech part is daunting to me. *I'm US and on a different time zone.
For sure! You are free to send me messages in private or here (in case you didnt get button to do so yet) whenever you find any troubles that you need help with, ill try to help as long as Im capable and around:). With ways to cope, i found this thread pretty useful to start: https://sanctioned-suicide.net/thre...booklets-digital-resources-megathread.138817/
Also, I wish you well!
 

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