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SadLoser

SadLoser

Member
Jul 31, 2021
83
I've known her for over a month now, we already had sex once, but it was awkward as we were drunk.
I met her last night unexpectedly, but I got a bit too drunk again and nothing happened. I left and I didn't even hug her. I think this was a bit dumb and awkward of me but the mood just wasn't there and I didn't want to make her feel weird.

I feel like she's taking longer to reply now and we're heading more towards friendship than what I want.
I asked her out for dinner and if she agrees, I want to let her know that I like her and basically would like to be in a relationship without it sounding uncomfortable.
How can I express my feelings to her?

Have we known each other for long enough/ done enough for us to have this talk? If she rejects me i'm fine with it but i'd like to know.
 
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cemeteryismyhome

cemeteryismyhome

Wizard
Mar 15, 2025
671
Warning: Old man here. You already have it all backwards but that's ok. At this point, just tell her "I really like you.". She how she reacts. Women can read men's minds, so she will know what you mean. But in order for the female radar system to work properly, you need to be in person, and not drunk. You'll know what to do next. Have fun, these days go by fast. DISCLAIMER: I am a miserable failure at this and the last person on earth who should be attempting to give advice.
 
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bankai

bankai

Enlightened
Mar 16, 2025
1,829
Ask her to hang out with you and then broach the subject. If you're really serious about it, look into her eyes and tell her. Don't reveal your feelings on any app, obviously.

The advice I've given is easier said than done. But dude, you're the best of us. I love the people that actually try to improve their lives on the site. So try.I hope it works out. And if it doesn't, that's OK too, because she's her own person and People are complicated. It's not a reflection of you if she doesn't want a relationship

Shoot your shot ma dawg,



wink-alonzo.gif
 
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SadLoser

SadLoser

Member
Jul 31, 2021
83
Warning: Old man here. You already have it all backwards but that's ok. At this point, just tell her "I really like you.". She how she reacts. Women can read men's minds, so she will know what you mean. But in order for the female radar system to work properly, you need to be in person, and not drunk. You'll know what to do next. Have fun, these days go by fast. DISCLAIMER: I am a miserable failure at this and the last person on earth who should be attempting to give advice.
Thank you. Yeah, I specifically said we should hang out sober next time. I want to be fully present with her, and not have my mind clouded by alcohol.

Ask her to hang out with you and then broach the subject. If you're really serious about it, look into her eyes and tell her. Don't reveal your feelings on any app, obviously.

The advice I've given is easier said than done. But dude, you're the best of us. I love the people that actually try to improve their lives on the site. So try.I hope it works out. And if it doesn't, that's OK too, because she's her own person and People are complicated. It's not a reflection of you if she doesn't want a relationship

Shoot your shot ma dawg,



wink-alonzo.gif
Thank you. I just feel like the few good things that come my way I always mess up out of my own stupidity and lack of experience. This thing I had going with her was perfect, but because I acted so unsure and awkward around her, I think she may have lost interest. I hope not. I'm trying to fix this situation, and if she rejects me then that's okay. I just want to know that I tried everything in my power from this moment.
 
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bankai

bankai

Enlightened
Mar 16, 2025
1,829
Thank you. Yeah, I specifically said we should hang out sober next time. I want to be fully present with her, and not have my mind clouded by alcohol.


Thank you. I just feel like the few good things that come my way I always mess up out of my own stupidity and lack of experience. This thing I had going with her was perfect, but because I acted so unsure and awkward around her, I think she may have lost interest. I hope not. I'm trying to fix this situation, and if she rejects me then that's okay. I just want to know that I tried everything in my power from this moment.
Absolutely. Shoot your shot bro, I hope you kill it.

You never know where these things can lead. Maybe 20 years down the line, you're married with kids. And you're happy. And you think about the time that you once visited a suicide website and laugh at yourself😂
 
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SadLoser

SadLoser

Member
Jul 31, 2021
83
Absolutely. Shoot your shot bro, I hope you kill it.

You never know where these things can lead. Maybe 20 years down the line, you're married with kids. And you're happy. And you think about the time that you once visited a suicide website and laugh at yourself😂
It's just that she's part of my friend group. She's actually renting a room in my friend's house. I don't want to make it awkward, but she is the one who made the first move on me, grabbed my hand, said she thinks i'm hot etc. I don't think it's delusional of me to think she likes me, right? I hope i'm not being sleazy and unable to take a hint to move on.
 
bankai

bankai

Enlightened
Mar 16, 2025
1,829
It's just that she's part of my friend group. She's actually renting a room in my friend's house. I don't want to make it awkward, but she is the one who made the first move on me, grabbed my hand, said she thinks i'm hot etc. I don't think it's delusional of me to think she likes me, right? I hope i'm not being sleazy and unable to take a hint to move on.
Your post reminds me of how reluctant men have become these days about making a move on women. It's quite understandable. At my workplace I have some women flirt with me and I act like a complete moron. I don't smile back and I'm glib. All the workplace warnings about sexual harassment have put me on edge. It isn't normal.

In your case, she's definitely interested. Women will usually touch guys that they like. It'll be a silly slap on the wrist. Small touches,whatever.But yeah, I think you can make a move without hesitation.
 
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SadLoser

SadLoser

Member
Jul 31, 2021
83
Your post reminds me of how reluctant men have become these days about making a move on women. It's quite understandable. At my workplace I have some women flirt with me and I act like a complete moron. I don't smile back and I'm glib. All the workplace warnings about sexual harassment have put me on edge. It isn't normal.

In your case, she's definitely interested. Women will usually touch guys that they like. It'll be a silly slap on the wrist. Small touches,whatever.But yeah, I think you can make a move without hesitation.
Sadly I might've messed it up. She's taking long to respond now and her responses are nowhere near as enthusiastic as they were.
 
bankai

bankai

Enlightened
Mar 16, 2025
1,829
Sadly I might've messed it up. She's taking long to respond now and her responses are nowhere near as enthusiastic as they were.
Yeah I get it.People are really fickle and they move on. Finding a soulmate is extremely hard. It means a lot of suffering and vulnerability on our part and putting ourselves out there.

Maybe she becomes interested if you show interest on your part. Whatever happens, I hope it works out. Fingers crossed.
 
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SadLoser

SadLoser

Member
Jul 31, 2021
83
Yeah I get it.People are really fickle and they move on. Finding a soulmate is extremely hard. It means a lot of suffering and vulnerability on our part and putting ourselves out there.

Maybe she becomes interested if you show interest on your part. Whatever happens, I hope it works out. Fingers crossed.
I asked her out for dinner. Long time no reply lol. I think she will though even just out of friendliness, and that's when I tell her. I feel like it's now or never.
I really never understood how people became "official" or if we even know each other enough to have this conversation, but i'm too socially inept to ever know for sure so I think i'll go for it.
 
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