• ⚠️ UK Access Block Notice: Beginning July 1, 2025, this site will no longer be accessible from the United Kingdom. This is a voluntary decision made by the site's administrators. We were not forced or ordered to implement this block.

How close are you to CTBing?


  • Total voters
    91
  • Poll closed .
S

sometimesoon

Student
Jul 9, 2024
127
How close are you to CTBing?
 
  • Hugs
Reactions: Praestat_Mori
exitingtothevoid

exitingtothevoid

🏳️‍⚧️
Aug 2, 2024
57
Planning it, reading through the exit bag megathread, but haven't bought any supplies yet and probably won't CTB anytime soon. I just need a plan, for now...
 
  • Hugs
Reactions: Praestat_Mori
Placo

Placo

Life and Death
Feb 14, 2024
902
I am already dead.
 
  • Like
  • Hugs
Reactions: LoiteringClouds, Praestat_Mori, LifeQuitter and 8 others
kyhoti

kyhoti

Looking for fair winds and following seas
May 27, 2024
294
T minus 30 days it looks like.
 
  • Hugs
  • Like
Reactions: Praestat_Mori and Imagined_Euphoria
T

tone

Member
Jun 16, 2024
71
All I have to do is purchase the pistol, then pick a date.
 
  • Hugs
  • Love
  • Like
Reactions: lynnschronicles, Praestat_Mori and Imagined_Euphoria
Imagined_Euphoria

Imagined_Euphoria

Student
Aug 5, 2024
159
I could do it any day if I want...I don't know if thats what keeps me still here, the option that "its always possible"...I also got no one that would talk me out of it. I barely talk with anyone in real life, I'm almost 24/7 online.
All I have to do is purchase the pistol, then pick a date.
Pistols are nice. Its so aesthetic. I can just use a shotgun sadly, pistol would be even cooler, but its expensive and takes long to buy here because of bullshit gun laws that makes no sense, a shotgun has bigger ammunition lmao
 
  • Like
  • Hugs
Reactions: 2messdup, Praestat_Mori and tone
FuneralCry

FuneralCry

Just wanting some peace
Sep 24, 2020
45,005
Never close enough, I should have long been free from the suffering this existence so tragically causes but of course I never should have suffered in the first place, truly wish I could just erase my existence that caused me nothing but pain but sadly that is not the reality and instead I'm still trapped here only wishing for an eternal release from an existence that was just a terrible, tragic mistake. If only there was the option to fall asleep eternally then none of this would exist for me and I wouldn't be able to hurt anymore.
 
  • Like
  • Hugs
  • Love
Reactions: Praestat_Mori, LifeQuitter, N33dT0D13 and 2 others
SoulWhisperer

SoulWhisperer

Unfazed By Suicide « MtF »
Nov 13, 2023
562
Trying to organise the resources to CTB in case I'll need them. Trying to see where the next chapter of my life will take me. If nothing good happens down the planning road I go.
 
  • Hugs
  • Love
Reactions: LoiteringClouds, lynnschronicles, Praestat_Mori and 2 others
L

Ligottian

Enlightened
Dec 19, 2021
1,102
A few traumas away.
 
  • Hugs
  • Love
Reactions: LoiteringClouds, lynnschronicles, sometimesoon and 2 others
Yaka

Yaka

Member
Jan 23, 2024
53
Already ready for when I am done
 
  • Hugs
  • Like
Reactions: sometimesoon, Praestat_Mori and kunikuzushi
Uninfluential_Karma

Uninfluential_Karma

Rat Cult Leader
Aug 5, 2024
86
I scheduled it vaguely so I can choose one of those dates I'm truly ready. It's coming close so fast and I'm both scared and excited.
 
  • Hugs
Reactions: lynnschronicles, sometimesoon and Praestat_Mori
prone2fury

prone2fury

i have pretty hair
Feb 4, 2023
71
not very, tbh. im too pussy
 
  • Hugs
  • Love
  • Like
Reactions: lynnschronicles, sometimesoon, Praestat_Mori and 1 other person
bugs_for_brains

bugs_for_brains

We can always regroup on the moon <3
Mar 4, 2024
93
i said planning bc I know when im going to do it but its not dependent on a date (it will be after my nan dies of her terminal illness) so i guess technically idk what equipment will be available to me when that time comes bc theres no way of knowing if its 2 weeks or 2 years away
 
  • Hugs
  • Love
Reactions: lynnschronicles, sometimesoon and Praestat_Mori
H

HChrissy

Member
Aug 6, 2024
17
Planning/preparing. I don't have a date or method yet (Want it to work and don't want to traumatize anyone who finds me) I've got 98% of my affairs in order, my letters written, passwords for things, money withdrawn, funeral plans
 
  • Hugs
  • Love
Reactions: LoiteringClouds, lynnschronicles, sometimesoon and 1 other person
Nephy

Nephy

I was only temporarily…
Jul 17, 2024
57
I have SN, even the other stuff I need .. just waiting to finish my project, but sadly yesterday someone told me it will need 7more weeks. Not sure if I can handle such a long time and my body is already disappearing (eating disorder) .. so within the next 7 weeks I will ctb - but I prefer to finish this project - it's very important to me 🥺
 
  • Hugs
  • Like
  • Love
Reactions: Jiroscope, LoiteringClouds, lynnschronicles and 4 others
N33dT0D13

N33dT0D13

Xe/It
Apr 2, 2023
365
Not too close to doing it myself but excruciating close to getting as fucked up as possible on every substance I have access to, running out somewhere potentially dangerous and letting nature run its course.
 
  • Hugs
Reactions: sometimesoon and Praestat_Mori
sugarb

sugarb

thief of silent dreams
Jun 14, 2024
794
How close are you to CTBing?
Will probably take six months to a year to actually get my method (2-3 if I'm unlucky somehow) but if I had my materials I'd be semi-ready. just need to do some surveying
Not too close to doing it myself but excruciating close to getting as fucked up as possible on every substance I have access to, running out somewhere potentially dangerous and letting nature run its course.
I would advise against that unless you're absolutely sure it'd work, otherwise you'd probably just get a nonlethal injury that'd decrease your QoL even further 😓 like tripping on a log and spraining an ankle or getting hit by a car and breaking some ribs
 
  • Hugs
  • Informative
Reactions: sometimesoon, N33dT0D13 and Praestat_Mori
B

brokeandbroken

Enlightened
Apr 18, 2023
1,195
How close are you to CTBing?
A mixture of all of those honesty. Nothing about my life is worth another second of. What little hope is fading fast. I'm literally starving. People have had the opportunity to show me they are good and kind. I have seen in trying to reclaim my stolen life none of that.
 
  • Hugs
Reactions: sometimesoon and Praestat_Mori
sorrowful

sorrowful

My exhaustion knows no end
Feb 13, 2023
282
I'll be gone by the end of this year. Currently in the process of making all final preparations. I have SN, I only need to get AE and benzos.
 
  • Hugs
  • Love
Reactions: lynnschronicles, sometimesoon, Nephy and 1 other person
A

Aether333

I'd like to leave. I did this yesterday already.
Apr 7, 2024
4
I have a vague timeframe but it is vague as I am trying to...try I guess. To live. It is a daily suffering that feels exactly the same. Each moment that passes just makes the vague date more clear to see....
 
  • Hugs
  • Love
Reactions: lynnschronicles, sometimesoon, Nephy and 1 other person
R

rozeske

Maybe I am the problem
Dec 2, 2023
4,074
I've been ready for a while, researched planned and made peace with my decision. If only I can find the money to execute my plan soon.
 
  • Hugs
  • Love
Reactions: lynnschronicles, sometimesoon and Praestat_Mori
P

Praestat_Mori

Mori praestat, quam haec pati!
May 21, 2023
13,013
Nowhere near. I'm hardly suicidal atm.
 
  • Hugs
  • Love
Reactions: LoiteringClouds, sugarb, lynnschronicles and 2 others
pomcustard

pomcustard

Almost free
Jul 29, 2024
58
A few days left till I ctb. Just counting down the days and trying to be as comfy as I can.
 
  • Hugs
Reactions: LoiteringClouds, lynnschronicles, sometimesoon and 1 other person
vi0lence

vi0lence

Member
Jun 29, 2024
18
i'm still using up my remaining hope. i won't kill myself for at least another couple of years i think, unless something goes wrong. i'm not afraid of suicide at all, just think life may have something to offer me still
 
  • Hugs
Reactions: sometimesoon
jyko

jyko

Here in night city
Aug 13, 2023
37
A mixture of all?? Kinda?? I have sn coming and I'm not sure if I'll keep it tucked away until my last big push one last try at life eventually fails or if I'll just get it over with already. Hard to know without it directly in front of me. The thought of it coming makes me feel kinda happy and puts my soul at ease so who knows
 
  • Love
  • Hugs
Reactions: sometimesoon and lynnschronicles
D

dimgobaith

Student
Jun 17, 2024
116
Getting closer every day
 
  • Love
Reactions: lynnschronicles
Yakamoz

Yakamoz

passer-by
Jun 26, 2022
326
Very close now I think
 
  • Hugs
Reactions: LoiteringClouds
2messdup

2messdup

Enlightened
Feb 10, 2024
1,392
How close are you to CTBing?
I have everything I need, but I'm trying to give MH services a chance. But in my mood swings I do get very impulsive and it could happen any day or not. I think eventually I will ctb though. But now I can go any time I want, I'm willing to see what happens with my new MH worker, knowing that if it gets too much I can go. I'm starting to lose my fear of dying (no fear of death itself) so who knows really.
 

Similar threads

F
Replies
4
Views
130
Suicide Discussion
nuggetfinder
nuggetfinder
wishingonstars
Replies
15
Views
341
Suicide Discussion
Exhausted!
E
R
Replies
9
Views
329
Suicide Discussion
permanently tired
permanently tired
sulk
Replies
2
Views
127
Suicide Discussion
WPack
WPack
U
Replies
2
Views
92
Suicide Discussion
Michelstaedter
Michelstaedter