I know this feeling...I was rendered homeless after a bad break up with an ex of 5 years. It was very traumatic.
I know things are so raw right now...and it feels like your world is ending and there is no life left to live, but if you have it within you please give yourself some time so you can think this through and process wanting to ctb. Is there an urgency? Does it have to happen right now? Do you feel like with currently how you're feeling, you could carry it out in a way that would be successful and would not cause disablement which would certainly worsen your quality of life and mental state?
Major life changes are so scary. I'm sending you so much love right now
Please consider thinking this through so that you don't potentially worsen your quality of life. Coming from a disabled person, I really would not wish it on anyone...
Please be careful trying to ctb with others around, that could end you up in a mental ward which surely would be even more traumatic