Method Failed SN attempt

[nitrogen]

I just need to get it out otherwise I can't fall asleep tonight.

but you keep bouncing back to some "other issues" that you are obsessed about: language, boundaries, rules, dictating, etc.

Ahem. I'm timidly adding "manipulation" to that list.

and I'm starting it GoodEffed-free from now. BLOCKED

@GoodPersonEffed

Sorry, I'm a hardcore rubbernecker. Can't help it. I'm fond of you both, though one chats with me and the other ignores me.

 

[Silasruin]

People do impulsive things and I supported members on failed attempts. When they have some awareness to their deeds. That's not the case with OP who just sipped SN & antidepressants (?) totally clueless afterwards wondering what happened and why.....

It reminds my of member here taking SN with LSD (then detailing a bad trip!). We should really draw the line of "acceptance and compassion" somewhere

You won't get my compassion for doing really reckless things while showing no awareness (!) to what you do. At least have that basic awareness? Willy-nilly making SN-Soup-of-stuff is BAD. Playing with poison is BAD. That's my prerogative and no one can call me out for it, as it's best not to encourage such extremely reckless acts by being "nice" -- rather pointing that out unambiguously .

Please do point out where I wonder what happened and why, oh benevolent overseer.

What are you even talking about sipping on SN? You are creating your own fan fiction to make yourself feel better.

I never asked for how to do it better. I'm fully aware I could have used a lesser dosage. That anti depressant is an anti emetic along with the domperidone. I've read and know what is recommended.

There is nothing playful about taking a larger dose intending to ensure death in moment of crisis.

I don't know what you and other members with similar sentiments are even getting at. You're contributing nothing, changing nothing and making things up now.

I care not for you compassion but maybe it's you who needs to look in the mirror when all you can offer is unsolicited advice and chastising with a smarmy attitude after someone attempts to end their life.

 

[Living sucks]

Please do point out where I wonder what happened and why, oh benevolent overseer.

What are you even talking about sipping on SN? You are creating your own fan fiction to make yourself feel better.

She was referring to 2 other previous posts from 2 other people in both accounts above. She was not quoting those from you.

 

[Silasruin]

Double dose?

DON'T. Double dose may do the opposite (vomiting all instead of some), though we don't know and PPH have doubled the dose through the years.

Did you research method ?......



What is a "stat dose of mirtazapine"??... Where did you get the idea, that a SNRI/tetracyclic (antidepressant) is part of SN practice ?........


Again , too much fasting IS a problem (stomach irritable & likely to reject everything quicker)

@autumnal did a fine job of pointing out the other problems here. Many of these things were written specifically. SN is fatal even if vomited -- because we use very little water intake. Take 50ml and you'll have nothing to vomit. Take more , it'll all come out ..



I'm sorry for being an 'asshole' but cannot feel sorry for a person doing almost everything wrong given the huge support / effort / help offered here. Imagine a person complaining about freezing, given a "heater" by community, but instead of using it responsibly sticks their fingers in it.... This is not a "failed attempt" but irresponsible self-harm and if we are to only hug these repeated bad practices it will become a norm.


shaming). Do not be enablers of wild experim

Honestly I'm just amazed that people support you while blatantly making things up. Where am I complaining? The only complaining here is done by you, because I didn't follow stans protocol.

And I posted my anecdote because even with vomitting, with the dose I took I thought I'd be gone and obviously not.

If nothing else it dissuades someone else reading this from taking overkill dosing in panic.

 

[Quarky00]

That anti depressant is an anti emetic along with the domperidone.

Says who?

Please do point out where I wonder what happened and why

I already did . See my post in reply to you .

You were wondering why you vomited everything after taking too much SN, and said that you were under the impression you can take more and more. That's your quote. You wondered what happened! I explained that is clearly not the case (others did as well). Never mind people make mistakes, that's okay. But being dismissive, careless, ignorant and disparaging after your 'failed ctb' when people point out things.. well, that is bad and sad.

You were given references to read. This was meant to help you. Your last post here shows you couldn't care less and not into researching method, sadly.

 

[Silasruin]

Says who?


I already did . See my post in reply to you . I detailed . You clearly not into listening.....

You were wondering why you vomited everything after taking too much SN, and said that you were under the impression you can take more and more. I explained that is clearly not the case (others did as well). Never mind people made mistakes, that's okay. But being dismissive, careless, ignorant and disparaging after your 'failed ctb' when people point out things.. well, that is bad and sad.

You were given the specific references to read. This was meant to help you. Your last post here shows you couldn't care less about that. You're not into researching this method. That is sad.

So where in that is a quote from me about wondering and why?

Look. I have researched this and I have read the guide. I was impulsive and panicked and went a different route.

You're not imparting any great knowledge on me I don't already know and I'm certainly not asking for. I'm going to leave this thread now as you are making things up in your head to justify your responses.

 

[Quarky00]

If nothing else it dissuades someone else reading this from taking overkill dosing in panic.

You "proved" what people had warned against endlessly? This is not very wise.

The only complaining here is done by you, because I didn't follow stans protocol.

That's a big problem, don't you get it?

people ignore the guides so blatantly and excessively

You keep on justifying that. That's the problem I was pointing out. We feel sorry for you (me too) while you don't seem to care.

You have "researched well" yet you took double dose "to ensure death"? In your last reply here you changed tune: "I was impulsive and panicked and went a different route." I wrote earlier: showing no awareness to what you do.

 

[Silasruin]

Agreed.

This is what I myself was thinking and while my SN claims a certain percentage on the package it could be way off.

It was an extremely quick reaction. Even still I'm surprised I don't have blue anywhere on me.

if it's true about the stomach acidity being too high after the prolonged fast, that may explain it.

 

[Quarky00]

So where in that is a quote from me about wondering

There ---

This is something I found interesting because I had been of the idea I could just keep redosing...but your body won't let you.

You are clearly wondering (curious, surprised, etc) about that overdose/vomiting . When pointing out that simple fact, that you were wondering, you reply "where did I wonder" Sorry, but you don't seem to be aware of what you write ..

 

[Silasruin]

There ---




You are clearly wondering (curious, surprised, etc) about that overdose/vomiting . When pointing out that simple fact, that you were wondering, you reply "where did I wonder" Sorry, but you don't seem to be aware of what you write ..

So again you are assuming/making things up.

I fully expected to vomit. That was the whole point of saying I thought I could push through and redose.

 

[Quarky00]

That was the whole point of saying I thought I could push through and redose.

Too much water/SN = severe vomiting , cannot take more , puke everything , not fatal . You are wondering about something people have warned about countless times.

You asked me that:

Please point out where I wonder what happened and why

I answered it and gave your exact quote. You were wondering why you can't push more SN, right? That's why I wrote: "clueless afterwards wondering what happened". Which you found offensive.... (Many here knew one cannot redose esp if already overdosed)




Now care to explain: What exactly did I make up?

 

[GoodPersonEffed]

It was an extremely quick reaction. Even still I'm surprised I don't have blue anywhere on me.

But yet you said...

I have a headache and the insides of my lips appear a little blueish-purple.

 

[Living sucks]

This is what I myself was thinking and while my SN claims a certain percentage on the package it could be way off.

It was an extremely quick reaction. Even still I'm surprised I don't have blue anywhere on me.

if it's true about the stomach acidity being too high after the prolonged fast, that may explain it.

Maybe you have nitrate and not nitrite?

And not to be insulting in anyway but you're first 5 posts were asking about methods that are not documented or well researched or experienced like dmso, enema etc. and i saw that you asked about dmso with 30-40g SN and that more must be better and no one clearly argued back at you that this in unnecessary, so you're question went unanswered and undisputed.,
You are a brand new member and only had like 5 posts prior to experimenting with SN.
I'm sorry you're even in this position to begin with. I'm here because I'm dying a horrible slow illness and I don't want to ctb. I can't imagine anyone "wanting" to. So i struggle with replies. If this is what you truly want it has to be planned properly. I know because I've failed a few times and it's made life worse. And you were told that the meds you had would not suffice... however I'm not a firm believer in the entire protocol only bcuz there are accounts of vomiting even with the protocol followed to the letter and still passing. I just wish you peace

 

[Silasruin]

But yet you said...

I wrote that at 3am initially without any natural light. I don't see anything now, so I think it might have been seeing what I was looking for.

 

[LMLN]

Others who have taken just a small amount of SN have had some symptoms like blue lips. Maybe it was not pure SN? I'm very surprised the amount you consumed did not require hospitalization. Don't misunderstand me, I'm glad you are still here! But SN is very deadly, even in small amounts. Could it be nitrate, not nitrite as @Living sucks has asked?

 

[a.n.kirillov]

People at the point of ending their lives aren't always going to be the most logical. Go figure.

And look if you don't even know yourself that fasting is an issue, maybe you should stop regurgitating it.

I took anti emetics.

I said I prepared 60g in 150ml. I didn't say I got the whole thing down in one go.

Fasting is of course an issue, because it makes you more likely to throw up, everybody knows this if he has ever drank a lot of alcohol on an empty stomach.

Sorry, but you made three big mistakes that were totally avoidable: 1) too much SN in 2) too much liquid after an 3) unnecessarily long fast

Are you glad you survived?

 

[Silasruin]

Others who have taken just a small amount of SN have had some symptoms like blue lips. Maybe it was not pure SN? I'm very surprised the amount you consumed did not require hospitalization. Don't misunderstand me, I'm glad you are still here! But SN is very deadly, even in small amounts. Could it be nitrate, not nitrite as @Living sucks has asked?

I suppose it's possible, but I have bled onto it and it turns a chocolate brown.

 

[LMLN]

You are very lucky to be alive! Take it as a sign that it was meant to be that you are here.

 

[Living sucks]

If this is 100% true, you are lucky it wasn't so much worse than vomiting. Ie a trip to the hospital and psych ward.
How do you feel after all this? Are you thankful to be alive or are you miserable that it didn't work and planning again?

 

[Silasruin]

If this is 100% true, you are lucky it wasn't so much worse than vomiting. Ie a trip to the hospital and psych ward.
How do you feel after all this? Are you thankful to be alive or are you miserable that it didn't work and planning again?

I'm not sure yet. I'm thankful that I am here to see my dog again, thankfully no one found out so now I know what I have to do next time without the emotional panic megadosage etc.

But I also know nothing has changed. My reasons to die are feeble by comparison to others. I know at night time alone with my thoughts is when the suicide wheel of fortune will start spinning.


At least I have time to follow the regiment closer, and if I can muster the courage again to follow through.

Thank you everyone for your words.

 

[Quarky00]

Others who have taken just a small amount of SN have had some symptoms like blue lips.

Member had passed out , we don't know if no 'blue lips' .. After metHb passes -- everything quickly resolves (within an hour or less) .. And it's not that nothing happened :

I laid on my side ... After not long I passed out

Most of SN was expelled. Member reported first drinking 40g/100ml , vomiting instantly , then taking 20g/50ml , violent vomiting . Probably some SN ingested which is normal , metHb effects were in fact reported: "lying down" and "pounding in the head" etc , followed by passing out. Very similar to reports of people "testing" SN.

Going back to LMLN mentioning 'people taking small amount of SN' :
Too much SN = Too little SN (in intestines). Because one would vomit the lot....

 

[Living sucks]

@Silasruin for the record, just so this isn't attempted, taking SN via enema is highly discouraged. It very well might kill you and you may avoid vomiting, but you WILL shit yourself. I will guarantee that one without having any proof. Would you rather vomit or shit uncontrollably, in your final moments?

If you take antipsychotics, you don't take Meto. If you don't take antipsychotics, then you take Meto (or similar) to see how it affects you before attempting any regimen, this way you'll know before if it's even an option. I can't take Meto, i have severe stomach and gastric issues, so if I do SN it's going to be SN by itself. And I already know that I will most likely be in a lot of stomach pain from the SN and suffer before passing out. So you have to prepare yourself. I know you expected to vomit and be able to keep drinking but that's impossible and no one had ever reported while taking SN that they drank any of the back up glasses.. not one single case. There was another member here who took a very small dose of SN thinking it wouldn't do anything and after 30 mins started having severe heart rate, couldn't walk or get of bed and felt they would black out and couldn't stop shivering. He was panicked but didn't call for help and posted pictures of his blue fingernails and grey skin the next day.

Ok friends thanks for ur support. now almost ok.. can walk also. only problem is really feeling sleepy. now its 9 pm here and i will go to bed now itself... My story is like this. Some days ago i failed after taking SN, no symptoms caused, the SN had salt taste but i feel either it was normal salt or nitrate.. Had done blood test with it and surely changed its color but not sure whether it was very dark brown or normal brown. So bought SN from another source and just wanted to test it before actually taking it. Today my parents were here also. I took SN around 3 pm, a very very small quantity and i drink only half of it too. Was very very salty but manageable. Nothing happened to me for the next 30 minutes so i thought it was also fake one. But after 30 - 40 minutes my heart started to beat so heavily and i was laying down that time and tried to walk but all of a sudden i began to feel like i am going to black out. i cant even walk an inch. even if i stand up it felt like i will fall down. My parents were watching me and asked me what happnd and i told them i have severe headache and they noted a change in my lip color and asked what happnd. i gave some lame excuses. From 4 pm to 7 pm it was a real nightmare for me. Cant even walk an inch or even stand up. When laying no problem apart from a small headache and sleepy feeling. I drunk lot of water after 7 and now feels ok. Still feeling sleepy but can now walk but walking like i am tired after walking for hours.

My doubt is as i have already broken the seal will it loose its purity. I will ctb only next week. Also why it took more time to show the symptoms ?

And a warning to all please dont even take a small quantity till u r ready to go. If my brother was also here then i would have been caught and now would have been in hospital as my face, lips everything looked weird and was laying in the bed for almost 3 hours.. The positive is it was really peaceful. Only mild headache and sleepy feeling. Just take the SN, lay down, relax and it will be fine. Thats what i feel after my todays experiment.

He says peaceful but I think he forgets the panic he was in posting for help to neutralize the affects.
My point here is don't mess with SN until you're prepared and ready, there are consequences.

https://sanctioned-suicide.net/threads/sn-blood-test-not-reliable.32584/

 

[autumnal]

Thank you to the members who have understood and supported my responses. This whole thing has become too expansive and emotive to respond to each argument individually, even if I thought it could help. I do not. There is such an apparent divide between those who share my (and others) viewpoint and those who don't that I don't see this difference being bridged anytime soon. On that issue, I think there will always be two camps on this board. Regardless of which you are in, at least the OP's behaviour and the subsequent size of this thread will create a reminder of what not to do with the SN method, albeit conflated with a sub-argument about whether they should be in any way accountable or critiqued for their deliberate mistakes, or somehow praised and accepted regardless.

OP took 60g in 150ml of water... overdose

Well, technically an overdose is what we are after when the normal amount of SN is used. The OP used more of an overoverdose.

 

[umniak]

I advise against this because 25g of salt can be fatal.

I did a thread for testing and planning the SN method and this came up.

https://sanctioned-suicide.net/threads/the-good-and-effed-sn-preparation-and-practice-journal.31458/

Isn't that why we are here? To die?

 

[Lethe]

If this thread has convinced me of anything, it's that there are some insufferable pricks on this board. Sorry you had to endure all this, OP. Hope you find peace whichever way you decide to go forward.

 

[Notabadguy]

* but Meto is not a guarantee against vomiting as proven in other cases.

There was another another member last week @Kibblesummer that posted they had dissolved the entire 113g in water and were going to drink it. Members quickly jumped in advising against this and had OP divide the contents into 3 more cups. Pics were posted. We tried to talk to the OP into waiting as this was not planned, no fasting, no prep etc. according to the OP they drank a cup and that was the last we heard.
I don't know why anyone would want to take more than the 20 or 25 g that is recommended, if they know about SN then they know AT LEAST, that basic knowledge. Kibblesummer stated they were not good at measuring or pouring so they just used the whole thing hoping it would work better.
Not to be insulting but unfortunately in some cases we are dealing with very immature OPs lacking the experience and desire to either a) follow the directions or b) just don't care and acting recklessly on purpose or c) on drugs or alcohol and impulsive.
These are all learning experiences for everyone if indeed they are true.
I personally cannot believe anyone could survive 60g of SN even with vomiting without needing medical intervention. I'm not saying it didn't happen, just that it's remarkable.

Why 48 hours of Metoclopramide regime is best? Stan's guide and Dignitas don't say so. Stan's guide says than the 48 hours regime is only to prepare yourself mentally, nothing else. These are the exact words in the Stan's guide:

"Stat dose is equally successful as the two day regime. Dignitas only use a Stat Dose process. Remember to consider the appropriate fasting and try not to drink for 2 hours beforehand."

It's important to stick to a clear scheme. If the Stan's guide has been improved would be useful to know exactly in what way.

 

[malummo]

If this thread has convinced me of anything, it's that there are some insufferable pricks on this board. Sorry you had to endure all this, OP. Hope you find peace whichever way you decide to go forward.

Kudos

 

[Quarky00]

Why 48 hours of Metoclopramide regime is best?

Stat or Regimen?	Both used with equal success. Depends on your sensitivities, conditions, and preferences.
Regimen	Builds tolerance – reduces side-effects Increased effectiveness – accumulates (also) – increased stomach tone over time Comfortable – feel prepared for ctb

https://sanctioned-suicide.net/posts/649564/

 

[Living sucks]

I believe the camp most everyone here is in, is looking for a peaceful end that is easy to obtain..Any thread that declares a survival from SN is going to attract a lot of attention, as has been shown over and over. With that attention, the seekers of deliverance have sincere curiosity and skepticism of the affects of SN. And the questioning begins. It may feel and look like an interrogation but everyone wants to know. Anyone who posts that they survived SN has to know they are going to get a lot of attention and should be prepared to answer. One can argue they don't owe anyone answers but if that's the case, don't post your experience.

The OP here, put forth a scenario that no one has ever before, 3x the recommended dosage, and survived with no medical intervention, no heart rate issues, no blue coloring, no hot or cold feeling, only vomiting and sleep. This is remarkable. This of course will spark debate. This is all natural.

We are like blood thirsty animals wanting to hear there's no pain from SN so we can stop searching for a method or questioning this one.

OP is obviously in pain or they wouldn't be here and wouldn't be buying SN. I wish you could resolve this pain without ctb. I'm sorry.

There is a way to call bs or mock poor judgment of the OP without causing harm and sparking arguments amongst each other. That must be found for useful commentary to be valuable to anyone.

There was an incident 2 weeks ago where 2 new members became friends bcuz of their country, the one member decided to ctb and was messaging the other. The non ctb member was posting to the forum and he said something that made someone following the posts blame him for encouraging the friend to ctb. The guy deleted his post and apologized profusely saying he was only offering support and asked ctb'er if he was truly sure he was making the right decision. Another member following the posts defended the OP saying he did not post anything that would insinuate encouragement. I didn't see what the post said so I can't comment to it. The ctb'r apparently succeeded in his wish and the brand new friend was the last person to speak to him. And now he was made to feel that it was his fault for not saving the man. That new member has not been back to this forum since! Did he ctb over the guilt? I hope not.
Be gentle, tread lightly, use caution, everyone here is pushed to their limit already.

 

[Notabadguy]

Stat or Regimen?	Both used with equal success. Depends on your sensitivities, conditions, and preferences.
Regimen	Builds tolerance – reduces side-effects Increased effectiveness – accumulates (also) – increased stomach tone over time Comfortable – feel prepared for ctb

https://sanctioned-suicide.net/posts/649564/

Although my English is bad, this information is contradictory. On one hand says: "Both used with equal success" (Stat or Regimen), on the other hand says: "Increased effectiveness" (Regimen). That is contradictory.