Help Facing the possibility of prison. Need to CTB.

[doublecupj]

Without going into detail, there's a real possibility of me going to prison for a long time in one of the worst states in the US. I don't think I can survive that and even if I did, I don't think my life would be worthwhile from that point forward.

What stops me is not wanting to hurt my girlfriend, my mother, my father, and my grandfather.

Especially my girlfriend. She is the sweetest person ever, she's a wonderful mom to her 2 kids and she doesn't deserve to hurt. But I worry that if I am locked up, she's going to have to move on anyway and that will be just as painful.

I have a note/text written for her and some of my closest family. My method is a 12 guage shotgun with .00 buckshot. I plan on shooting myself through the mouth. I am wondering what death is like, and part of that is also scary.

I probably need to do this either today or tomorrow. I just want my sweet girlfriend to know I love her forever and I want her to be ok.

 

[Zeir Anpin 729]

12 guage shotgun with .00 buckshot

I don't recognize any of those words. I only know smaller weapons that are used in war and self defense. Like currently I am thinking that I myself want to use hollow point rounds and probably a .48. But I have turned to researching drugs and drug combinations instead. Turns out that chemistry is really complicated and most scientists don't even know how any of these patented molecules even work at all. So I'm getting nowhere. Hopefully your method works and there is no pain involved.


PS: The worst state in the US is definitely New York. Lots of rapists and useless gang members that failed at integrating into society because they have no soul. They are the ones that make it terrible.

 

[Vlad Tepes]

I envy Americans with their access to boomsticks.

 

[darksouls]

Without going into detail, there's a real possibility of me going to prison for a long time in one of the worst states in the US. I don't think I can survive that and even if I did, I don't think my life would be worthwhile from that point forward.

What stops me is not wanting to hurt my girlfriend, my mother, my father, and my grandfather.

Especially my girlfriend. She is the sweetest person ever, she's a wonderful mom to her 2 kids and she doesn't deserve to hurt. But I worry that if I am locked up, she's going to have to move on anyway and that will be just as painful.

I have a note/text written for her and some of my closest family. My method is a 12 guage shotgun with .00 buckshot. I plan on shooting myself through the mouth. I am wondering what death is like, and part of that is also scary.

I probably need to do this either today or tomorrow. I just want my sweet girlfriend to know I love her forever and I want her to be ok.

I am so sorry for your situation, I wish you the best

 

[claracatchingthebus]

Without going into detail, there's a real possibility of me going to prison for a long time in one of the worst states in the US. I don't think I can survive that and even if I did, I don't think my life would be worthwhile from that point forward.

What stops me is not wanting to hurt my girlfriend, my mother, my father, and my grandfather.

Especially my girlfriend. She is the sweetest person ever, she's a wonderful mom to her 2 kids and she doesn't deserve to hurt. But I worry that if I am locked up, she's going to have to move on anyway and that will be just as painful.

I have a note/text written for her and some of my closest family. My method is a 12 guage shotgun with .00 buckshot. I plan on shooting myself through the mouth. I am wondering what death is like, and part of that is also scary.

I probably need to do this either today or tomorrow. I just want my sweet girlfriend to know I love her forever and I want her to be ok.

i am so sorry you are going through this.

there are cases where people have been out on bail, gone to court and gone to a jury trial, and then lost, then consumed poison in the courthouse in order to quickly die before going to prison, but if you did that and won, then you wouldn't take the poison. this is risky as there is some chance of poison being found during a jury trial or while entering into court, but it could probably be done with a 15 percent chance of being caught if done carefully. i am not recommending that since it's illegal, but people have done that before.

you should not discuss your case here if you registered with your real IP address (didn't use a VPN or tor) or if it's linked to a real email. Many cases result in plea deals for much less time than the max time

Is a long time a year? 2 years? 10 years? 20 years? If it's one or two years, sometimes people will just spend their time getting a degree or reading books. They have tablets in there, apparently.

Were you already arrested and are you out on bail? Do you have an attorney? Are you expecting to be arrested?

 

[doublecupj]

i am so sorry you are going through this.

there are cases where people have been out on bail, gone to court and gone to a jury trial, and then lost, then consumed poison in the courthouse in order to quickly die before going to prison, but if you did that and won, then you wouldn't take the poison. this is risky as there is some chance of poison being found during a jury trial or while entering into court, but it could probably be done with a 15 percent chance of being caught if done carefully. i am not recommending that since it's illegal, but people have done that before.

you should not discuss your case here if you registered with your real IP address (didn't use a VPN or tor) or if it's linked to a real email. Many cases result in plea deals for much less time than the max time

Is a long time a year? 2 years? 10 years? 20 years? If it's one or two years, sometimes people will just spend their time getting a degree or reading books. They have tablets in there, apparently.

Were you already arrested and are you out on bail? Do you have an attorney? Are you expecting to be arrested?

I'm expecting to be arrested. Its a family member pressing charges. Depending on what happens there's the possibility of 2-20 years but I am a first time offender so possibly no prison time?

 

[r.m.216]

I'm expecting to be arrested. Its a family member pressing charges. Depending on what happens there's the possibility of 2-20 years but I am a first time offender so possibly no prison time?

Depends on the charge

 

[claracatchingthebus]

I'm expecting to be arrested. Its a family member pressing charges. Depending on what happens there's the possibility of 2-20 years but I am a first time offender so possibly no prison time?

you should be finding the best most well-connected attorney you can afford right now, not being on SaSu.

go find a well-connected attorney. there also may be smart things to do prior to an arrest (ie, your attorney may suggest to check yourself into a 21 day rehab if you're an alcoholic, etc).

this, in and of itself, may not be worth dying over. Can you afford bail?

So if this is something like the person was beaten, you will face time but may be okay, if there were any weapons involved or attempts to kill or choking, that's where it gets more serious and could be a lot of time. If you can easily afford bail, you don't need to decide now. Can you afford an attorney? Are you able to just call the public defender's office now and ask them for advice? Can you call a private attorney or the public defender's office?

If you haven't been arrested, are you able to just leave and stay with relatives elsewhere until the statute of limitations runs out and do that legally if you currently have no knowledge of an arrest warrant?

These are questions you may want to ask an attorney.

If the family member is pressing charges and it relates to a sex offense, that can be a lot of time, you should get a lawyer.

You should also not talk about your case to anyone, including posting here what it might be. If someone is making a false allegation, you would have no idea to expect that they would do that, so making statements on here like "I'm expecting this and I'm worried" could potentially be used against you. You need to not talk to anyone here, go get a lawyer, do not talk with family about this, do not talk with jail cell mates or anyone nearby about it if you get arrested, just go talk to a lawyer, if you are poor, try to talk to the public defender. they may not be willing to talk to you if you haven't been arrested. sometimes if you are in the US your state bar can do a low cost referrer to a lower fee attorney just for an initial consult which could help if you don't know what to expect.

do not text people about this, that creates permanent records. just do not say anything or write anything. it will get used against you. this site is encrypted with https so it's secure (there could be DNS records of connecting to the site but the contents of the packets would be encrypted that go to to the site so they won't automatically see your posts), but you may want to ask for the mods to delete your account to de-link all of these posts with you, it will replace your username with something else. sometimes internet history is subpoenaed and unless you are a techie you will have left a lot of info behind.

 

[Worndown]

You should check with an attorney to guage the impact.
Is a conviction likely?
If convicted, is prison likely?
Probable sentence time?

Everything has variables.
Know what they are.