C
CutePrincess
Member
- Sep 16, 2025
- 37
I don't have any will to live. I don't belive in recovery. I suffer from mental illness. I feel in a way that is unbearable. I won't do basic things like washing my teeth unless someone tell me to do it. I struggle to answer questions from people. The problem is that my mum is doing everything she can to save me. We kinda agreed that I will try to recover for a year and if I still will be sick and suicidal but I feel like every day it to much. I'm not greatfull for the support I'm mad because I already decided that I want to die but her effort and my care for her is holding me back. I planed to cbt with a women I met her last sunday but I told her I'm not sure after seeing how much my mum is doing and she backed down. I'm mad at my mother I'm not killing myself because of her. I ordered sn, cancelled it after conversation with my mum and ordered it again. I feel I want to have it just in case but I'm afraid I may take it impulsivly or change my mind.