Does this mean I'm not ready to ctb?

[astro]

So I've been receiving ECT the last couple of weeks and the thought of dying by narcosis has been scaring the shit out of me. I also once read about a member of this forum who loved the feeling of the narcosis setting in. For me it's the total opposite. Does this mean I'm just not ready to die?

 

[Thereisnothing]

If anything scares you or gives any doubt at all, then I would say there is alot to think over first before you decided to go ahead with your plan.

 

[BPD Barbie]

If you feel scared, I'd say it's not your time yet and you know what? That's OK. There is no hurry or rush, there is ample time to find another method that you feel more safe and comfortable with. Take all the time you need

 

[Ghost2211]

Necrosis honestly just kind of seems scary and gross and painful I can see why it would be desired to avoid it.

 

[TAW122]

If you are still unsure and hesitant, then I would hazard to say that you aren't really "ready" yet. You should make sure that this is exactly what you want, otherwise you may end up failing an attempt and even up in a worse situation (or pick methods that aren't as reliable). Whatever you decide to do, I hope you find peace.

 

[GoodPersonEffed]

I'm unclear as to how the fear of narcosis relates to being ready to die or not. Is narcosis a symptom of your chosen method? Then perhaps it's the method that's the issue.

For example, I'm ready to ctb, but I'm terrified of heights so I simply can't jump to accomplish it. I can't handle a bag over my head because I feel like I'm suffocating, so I can't use an exit bag. I would do partial suspension, but my cartoids are too deep. I have to have a means that doesn't terrify me and that agrees with my physiology. It's the means to get to the bus that's the issue for me, not the bus itself.