Discussion Does anyone else hate sleeping?

[dhk96]

I never liked sleeping.

It always felt like a waste of time because I lived every moment of my life since childhood in flight mode, with the idea that I was 'running out of time.' Sleep was simply something that cut into that limited amount of time.

Then I got insomnia in high school which continued into college. I still hated sleeping but it might have helped to be able to catch some shut-eye lol Currently, I kind of just black out without being able to dream and I don't feel refreshed after waking up either (almost as if I never went to sleep). I also have some issues with waking up a couple times in the middle of the night.

Another reason I hate sleeping is because I feel safer when everyone around me is, or technically should be, sleeping. It feels like time comes to a brief pause and that I have a bit more time than I really do by being conscious in the moment. I know I can't keep denying reality but staying stuck and pretending I'm stuck in a period of frozen time is less uncomfortable than acknowledging that everything has changed, is changing, and is always going to change.

It seems like many people who are depressed tend to sleep more because of a lack of energy or because they find an escape through their dreams. Is there anyone who finds an escape in the opposite? By being awake instead of being asleep?

 

[darksouls]

I dislike sleeping because my nightmares are very stressful

 

[dhk96]

I dislike sleeping because my nightmares are very stressful

I'm sorry. That must be really tiring Being conscious is already stressful so it sucks that a form of unconsciousness isn't of help either.

 

[cherrypitlover03]

Sometimes I dislike sleep because my dreams can be traumatic, disturbing, triggering or just otherwise upsetting. However, for the most part it's my favorite activity because it's the closest I am to death. Every day when I wake up and realize I have no choice but to finish sleeping for the day, I feel an Everest of dread. I wish my whole life could be spent in bed…I truly can't leave at this point

 

[kunikuzushi]

I hate sleeping because I can't fall asleep with sounds or light, so I have to be alone with my awful thoughts for 2 hours trying to fall asleep. And when I wake up, I face the most unbearable anxiety from the shock of realizing I have to live through another day.

 

[FadingSnowFake]

I sleep when I can't keep my eyes open anymore. Normally I pass out after a few high episodes from weed. If I don't sleep, I will be a walking zombie the next day. I'm okay with about 5 hours a night. I don't dream much anymore, so luckily haven't had a nightmare in a long time. I've heard it may be the weed helping.

 

[avalokitesvara]

I love sleep. I drift off easily into naps and half-awake hypnogogic states. At night I sleep for a long time, and lately I feel I want to live in my dreams more than in reality. More happens there, it's brighter, more real than reality.

The part I hate is waking up and a new day beginning. I wish the hours between 4-7am could last forever. I don't know whether I might be better off becoming nocturnal. That way I can avoid the day and live in the liminal zone of the nighttime when everyone else is sleeping..

 

[dhk96]

Sometimes I dislike sleep because my dreams can be traumatic, disturbing, triggering or just otherwise upsetting. However, for the most part it's my favorite activity because it's the closest I am to death. Every day when I wake up and realize I have no choice but to finish sleeping for the day, I feel an Everest of dread. I wish my whole life could be spent in bed…I truly can't leave at this point

It's interesting how we see things similarly and differently. I also dread waking up and most people would probably agree. But waking up is part of the process and so to avoid all that as much as I can, my simple brain goes straight to "ayo, how about we just not sleep? " It's not very successful ofc lol.

I hope the occurence of traumatic dreams keeps going down until they're something you won't have to worry about anymore. Have a good night wherever you are.

I hate sleeping because I can't fall asleep with sounds or light, so I have to be alone with my awful thoughts for 2 hours trying to fall asleep. And when I wake up, I face the most unbearable anxiety from the shock of realizing I have to live through another day.

Does white noise of your choice help at all? Like setting up a fan next to your bed or a humidifier. I find that it's better when the background noise is something you choose and cool, circulating air can feel refreshing on the skin.

The anxiety though... *hugs*

I sleep when I can't keep my eyes open anymore. Normally I pass out after a few high episodes from weed. If I don't sleep, I will be a walking zombie the next day. I'm okay with about 5 hours a night. I don't dream much anymore, so luckily haven't had a nightmare in a long time. I've heard it may be the weed helping.

Oof, nightmares seem to be common concern. I'm glad you found something that works for you, and I hope the sleep quality only continues to get better. Everyone here deserves peaceful nights (and lives if we could help it).

I love sleep. I drift off easily into naps and half-awake hypnogogic states. At night I sleep for a long time, and lately I feel I want to live in my dreams more than in reality. More happens there, it's brighter, more real than reality.

The part I hate is waking up and a new day beginning. I wish the hours between 4-7am could last forever. I don't know whether I might be better off becoming nocturnal. That way I can avoid the day and live in the liminal zone of the nighttime when everyone else is sleeping..

That's incredible. Maybe sleeping wouldn't be so bad with vivid and exciting dreams like yours. If dreams had a co-op feature, I'd vote for us to just play in yours haha.

 

[pthnrdnojvsc]

Even sleeping is horrible for me. But awake also horrible

And these are not even the main reasons but yeah nightmares , trouble breathing, even dreaming is that "me" in the dreams, wtf is that . For one thing if that were "me" in the dreams I would know a lot of that garbage is not possible and would realize its only a dream but "i" never question it and the thinking and consciousness of this me character my brain creates is different from the waking one. more evidence the brain creates this model of a self and a model of consciousness as both models r different

I hate it when people say Death is like sleeping. No Death is beautiful Non-existence forever, i don't exist. U don't exist u r not sleeping there is no u , there is nothing.

I am just a brain. Its a horror. When my brain dies it can't create the model of my self anymore nor of consciousness.

Non-existence forever is the ultimate bliss

 

[MyShadow]

I used to sleep to recover from the day.
Now I sleep to escape from the pain and loneliness I feel inside.

 

[anna_bot]

Sometimes, when i go to sleep to forget everything, I dream of better times. And in those dreams, I have fun, I feel warmth, I feel. I finally feel something again. But then I wake up.

 

[cemeteryismyhome]

When I was a little kid I hated sleeping because I was terrified at night, if seemed like a waste of time, and I wanted to do stuff instead. I'm what most people would call old now, and I enjoy sleeping. I'm tired, it feels good to shut off, and it's an easy way to burn up the hours and days of my life that I have no use for, like fast-forwarding through the credits at the end of a movie.

 

[dontwakemeup]

I look forward to sleeping. It's the only time I have peace. I always hope for a happy dreams. Lately, I been having a few nightmares but I contribute that to my personal situation. Sleep is my only peace, solitude and I'm only happy in my dreams

 

[LighthouseHermit]

Sleeping is wonderful, even though I have a lot of nightmares. Waking up is the shitty part though

 

[Lost Magic]

Sleeping is a big part of my existence. It's the ultimate escape for 8 to 12 hours. I can sleep even longer (sometimes) with sleeping tablets. But it's not enough. I want to sleep forever. All in good time.

 

[whyyyyyyyy]

I never liked sleeping.

It always felt like a waste of time because I lived every moment of my life since childhood in flight mode, with the idea that I was 'running out of time.' Sleep was simply something that cut into that limited amount of time.

Then I got insomnia in high school which continued into college. I still hated sleeping but it might have helped to be able to catch some shut-eye lol Currently, I kind of just black out without being able to dream and I don't feel refreshed after waking up either (almost as if I never went to sleep). I also have some issues with waking up a couple times in the middle of the night.

Another reason I hate sleeping is because I feel safer when everyone around me is, or technically should be, sleeping. It feels like time comes to a brief pause and that I have a bit more time than I really do by being conscious in the moment. I know I can't keep denying reality but staying stuck and pretending I'm stuck in a period of frozen time is less uncomfortable than acknowledging that everything has changed, is changing, and is always going to change.

It seems like many people who are depressed tend to sleep more because of a lack of energy or because they find an escape through their dreams. Is there anyone who finds an escape in the opposite? By being awake instead of being asleep?

Sounds like you enjoy solitude. When we're constantly surrounded by people, activity, distractions, we can't breathe. We can't slow enough to even hear what we really think about anything. The moment you get to finally be alone is like a rare opportunity to finally spend some time with yourself. How weird is that?

In the night, when you're alone, no one's bustling about. No one's going to talk to you or bother you with things to do. The world is dark and quiet. Finally, stillness. This is why people are night owls. At least a temporary break where nothing is moving, and you can just be, without the pressure of being observed, or having to do anything.

Sleeping is depressing because you just waste away these hours of solitude, and it makes it so you're life is just a never ending navigation of the busy day, not a single day off from life.

Suicide is like quitting out of life, right? If only we could take a temporary vacation from life entirely, the same way suicide does, but temporarily. The best we have is moments where you can be alone and you don't have to do anything. But it's not a true vacation because you know that next day is coming in the back of your mind.

Well, I guess sleep is kind of like dying temporarily. You just don't exist for 8 hours. The problem is you don't get to savor it. It just whooshes by and you have to be busy again.

I heard of monks in Asia who supposedly would attempt to stay conscious the entire night as they rested in bed. They would enter a deep, absorbed state of mental rest, like a peaceful, conscious blackout from your life and body. That sounds tight, but I've never succeeded at it, I always just fall asleep.

 

[EternalHunger]

Recently my nightmares been getting heavily frequent, so I just tend to not sleep well or at all.

 

[MissAbyss]

I love sleeping despite the nightmares. Earlier this year, I developed acute insomnia. I didn't sleep for a whole week, then slept for maybe 1.5 hours a week for five months straight. It was terrible; insomnia breaks you down. Now my sleep pattern has returned to normal somewhat. Thank God! My heart goes out to people who suffer from severe insomnia