Discussion Do you feel free knowing it will end soon?

[Cyagangy]

I'm not sure if it's Apathy or bravery but after overcoming my fear of death I find myself living without fear of consequences. I feel like I can really do what I want within reason. If someone pisses me off I can say fuck them or if I want to try something that sounds dangerous I wouldn't think for a second about doing so. It's strange how knowing when my end is has lead to me not caring about the other consequences I must face later in life.

 

[Fate]

I guess so, I've come to terms with it Knowing I'm going to ctb soon. I'd rather be stripped completely of all feelings, good and the bad.

 

[ijustwishtodie]

Sadly not. Just because I'll be free soon doesn't mean that I'm free right now. Right now, I'm a prisoner trapped in metaphorical chains. I can only be free once I'm dead but, since I'm not dead, I'm not free

 

[bestroper]

Yes. Thoughts about ctb calm me and remind me that there is a way out.

 

[Mlifos & Sitoa]

Yes but no. I still feel social anxiety everywhere I go, I think I can't escape that illness. But at least I don't care about my future or my death so I can feel more comfortable. My parents and relatives keep talking bullshit, trying to motivate me. I didn't ask to come to this shitty planet and they're still playing the victim. Ridiculous.

 

[Steff1337]

To me knowing that I have a peaceful way to go is a tremendous relive, and yes, it makes me not care about anything anymore.

 

[ThatGuyOverThere]

No, Not yet, my CTB Is quite a few years away, but I have noticed that as I get closes year by year, I feel incrementally less connected to the expectations of others, and I am no longer shackled to there idea of what they want to be.

 

[CantDoIt]

I actually feel more desire to be kind and accommodating as I want to show understanding and love in my final time before I go. I think it's something I am supposed to be doing.

 

[lizzywizzy09]

No. For me, being free means I can back out at any time if I choose. I have no choice.

 

[Aprilfarewell4]

No. For me, being free means I can back out at any time if I choose. I have no choice.

I never heard back from you. Did you change your mind? Wasn't sure you were still here.
No. because no matter what the suffering doesn't stop. I won't be free until I'm dead soon.