Discussion do therapists actually break confidentiality if you mention self harm/sucide?

[troonbeau]

almost everybody in my life at some point has told me to get therapy, and now that i have a good amount of money to pay for it, i think i will. but i'm worried it's not going to do anything for me, i've already pretty much decided i wanted to ctb sometime soon but i'm really sick of being miserable every day, so, therapy it is. anyways, i'm wondering if anybody here has talked to a therapist about suicide/self harm. i've read online that they contact police/ems, family members, etc when you say that you're going to/have been harming yourself. has anyone actually experienced that? i want to discuss my tendencies with an expert but im worried they'll call somebody on me.

sorry if this is a dumb question/posted in the wrong place, this is my first post

 

[ritahaddad]

if you SH they prolly wont and even if you say you think about suicide they probably wont but if you show signs of planning and or attempting then ya they throw you in a mental hospital

 

[whywere]

At least in my case, YES!!!!!!!!!!!

One time when I caught my now ex-cheating, I called and talked a few minutes. The next thing I knew, the cop dispatcher called my cell phone and told me to unlock my door and come out. I asked what?

Unlocked and opened the door and cops rushed in and grabbed me and hauled me off to the psychic ward.

Found out later that a receptionist was told to "call the cops" on me.

So, at least in my case, a 100% YES!!!!

Walter

I am in the U.S. if that matters.

 

[troonbeau]

At least in my case, YES!!!!!!!!!!!

One time when I caught my now ex-cheating, I called and talked a few minutes. The next thing I knew, the cop dispatcher called my cell phone and told me to unlock my door and come out. I asked what?

Unlocked and opened the door and cops rushed in and grabbed me and hauled me off to the psychic ward.

Found out later that a receptionist was told to "call the cops" on me.

So, at least in my case, a 100% YES!!!!

Walter

I am in the U.S. if that matters.

thank you. i was kind of hoping i was just being paranoid but it sounds like i was right for suspecting. im sorry to hear they did that to you.

 

[Codename_Joker]

People make it impossible to be honest. Ignoring the cost of therapy I really don't like the thought of feeling like I need to walk on eggshells for help.

 

[Dejected 55]

They might. It's a tough call. I think they have a legal obligation to intervene if they sincerely believe you might be a danger to yourself or others. The problem that comes in is that their belief and your intentions in the moment could be miles apart... but a good therapist who actually cares... do they risk not intervening if they think you might be at risk?

I'd have a tough time blaming a therapist for acting on a sincere belief out of genuine concern. But all situations are unique and some people misinterpret things. It goes both ways too. Sometimes they overreact and you end up in a situation you didn't deserve... sometimes they might ignore an obvious sign, you take your life, and they feel guilty they didn't do something.

 

[doomedbynarrative]

Check the laws where you live. Especially if you're in the USA. Different states have different laws. Where I live merely talking about it without expressing a plan doesn't mean automatic psych ward depending on the therapist. Some give you what's called a Safety Plan that you fill out with them and they keep a copy on file.

 

[NormallyNeurotic]

Therapists are mandated reporters, just like school counselors, social workers, etc.

A therapist should only call for an involuntary psychiatric hold if you state complete intention to harm yourself or others (self-harm, suicide, murder, etc), or if they believe you are an imminent risk.

Should.

Unfortunately mental health workers can tend to be very "trigger happy," and report you for discussing normal urges/ideation. Thankfully, my therapist is not one of those types, and we talk about suicide frequently. I asked them ahead of time, explaining that talking out my ideation/urges is actually the best way to avoid me hurting myself.

 

[inextremis]

I don't bother with therapy anymore but I used to be fairly open with my therapist when I was going. You can tell them you're suicidal. You just can't say "I'm going to ctb tomorrow" or something. They legally have to inpatient you if you're an imminent threat to yourself.

 

[troonbeau]

They might. It's a tough call. I think they have a legal obligation to intervene if they sincerely believe you might be a danger to yourself or others. The problem that comes in is that their belief and your intentions in the moment could be miles apart... but a good therapist who actually cares... do they risk not intervening if they think you might be at risk?

I'd have a tough time blaming a therapist for acting on a sincere belief out of genuine concern. But all situations are unique and some people misinterpret things. It goes both ways too. Sometimes they overreact and you end up in a situation you didn't deserve... sometimes they might ignore an obvious sign, you take your life, and they feel guilty they didn't do something.

i wouldnt blame them, if i were in their position i'd probably do the same thing.

i guess i'll have to see if they're somebody i can really connect with. if they are, i'd probably be less inclined to hide it from them because i already have a lot of people in my life who i know i'll let down, adding them to the list when i had barely known them would be very cruel

 

[aRose]

Mandated reporters are the worst. Yes they will.

 

[kufajoy]

Mostly they will and most of the time therapy doesn't work.

 

[LastAcrobat]

At least with my experience they can and often will, however at least in my case I was able to convince the hospital/ward that it was a misunderstanding and I got away (mostly) fine. I was there for a solid chunk of the day though which wasn't fun.

This only applies to my case and my country so it will differ for different people and cases.

 

[woofwag]

Ask them about their policy for admitting people. I always ask new therapists if they have ever hospitalized someone, and what made them do that/if they didn't then what would make them feel like they had to hospitalize them or call the cops on them. I will not mention I am suicidal to any professional until I'm sure of their policy so I can avoid cops and the psych ward. Don't trust any hotline worker because they have specific scripts and often are more trigger-happy with calling the cops, but knowing those limits with a therapist is very important to not feel paranoid. They won't lie about their policy. I'm wishing you luck in finding a good one <3

 

[joegoes100]

almost everybody in my life at some point has told me to get therapy, and now that i have a good amount of money to pay for it, i think i will. but i'm worried it's not going to do anything for me, i've already pretty much decided i wanted to ctb sometime soon but i'm really sick of being miserable every day, so, therapy it is. anyways, i'm wondering if anybody here has talked to a therapist about suicide/self harm. i've read online that they contact police/ems, family members, etc when you say that you're going to/have been harming yourself. has anyone actually experienced that? i want to discuss my tendencies with an expert but im worried they'll call somebody on me.

sorry if this is a dumb question/posted in the wrong place, this is my first post

I had a similar situation. I sh, and one day got too drunk at a party and told three of my friends about it. Two other friends found out later. That's everyone that knew, which I knew of. One day at school (I'm 18 as a senior), I got called down to the counselors office where she told me someone called her and expressed concerned about my cutting my self. I still don't know who did it, and how they found out, but I knew it wasn't one of those 5 people. I started shaking when my counselor told me someone told her and had to come clean because I had no poker face at all, I was under the impression it would stay between us. She then told me she'd have to tell my parents, I completely lost all trust. I sugar coated everything as much as possible and didn't tell her the full truth ( why I do it, how much, etc). So basically if it's a counselor, they will tell your parents. I can't speak for professional therapists, but in my experience, she called home and told my parents.

 

[Dejected 55]

If got into a debate before with one, after coming out of a mental health facility they asked me the question along the lines of "do you feel like you might self harm or have you felt that way in the past six months" my response was "no" and their reply was "but you were released from the hospital in the last month for an attempt" it's truly a trap they didn't want me to get better it was entrapment. You can truly depend on no one other than yourself, I hope that you can find someone to confide in or at least find peace for yourself. I had one good therapist since age 7 and they had told me "please find a good friend you can trust" and they had quit the job the next day, this was in a residential setting at the age of 15 I can say not only were they my therapist but the only true "friend" I could be truly honest with.

Curious. I had a similar experience with opposite results.

I had just spent 2 weeks in a hospital after failing an attempt. Every day in that facility I told them I wasn't making plans while in the hospital but that I expected to start researching again once I was released... but they sent me home after 2 weeks anyway but scheduled an appointment with a therapist the following day.

I went to that therapist appointment and literally while I was explaining to the therapist how I had attempted and been in a facility the past 2 weeks and I wasn't sure what I was going to do... they called for police and sent me back to the facility I had just been released from. I even asked them, does it make sense that you're sending me back to the facility that just released me and I told you the exact same thing I have been telling them for weeks? Nobody had an answer for me... but I spent another 5 days in the facility before being released again. This time, however, they released me before scheduling another follow-up so I never responded to inquiries after that of them trying to schedule one for me.

 

[ifihadnever]

It depends on the therapist. I asked them straight off. A therapist I use to have daid she never would or clients wouldn't trust her.

My current therapist says she only will if I tell her about a plan and a day (she doesnt like drs and ive had traumatic experiences with them so think I would really have to push it for her to call someone).

Best thing to do is ask straight off.

 

[Dejected 55]

The tricky part about asking a therapist how they will react... is that in and of itself could trigger some therapists who might make the logic leap from "why is he asking me unless he must be planning something" and they might report you just for the asking if they are jumpy.

 

[vyvanceandvodka]

My personal experience has been if I don't have a plan to end my life, they won't report me. Same with cutting. I'm not reported. I'm open about my suicidal ideation. I'm assuming you're 18+ but when I was cutting as a minor, confidentiality was broken. Not as an adult though.

 

[spiders.in.my.head]

my psychiatrist never told on me, kept everything confidential, even when i was still a minor. idk, others experience will probably differ, but for me, the protocol has been "talk honestly, most of the time". i will sometimes bend the truth, like if i do talk ab suicidal ideation and the psych asks like when were the most recent thoughts and if i have a method planned, ill give a timeline thats at least a week back and never elaborate on a method, usually saying i haven't thought about it.

i think it really depends on the person, and i certainly wouldn't let all the cats out of the bag in the first few sessions, but as long as you can deny or avoid suspicion of being in immediate acute danger, it should be good.

 

[5er50ji]

From my experience it kind of depends, years ago I had a therapist at university who warned me would call my next of kin and an ambulance if I disclosed it but my last therapist just told me to call Samaritans

 

[hurb]

sounds counter intuitive , if someone is doing therapy it means they r actually trying to get better. reporting them will only result in them giving up on recovering all together.
I feel like a therapist job isn't rly to stop u from harming urself , rather help u find hope. after all that's all we r looking for , the tinniest ray of hope

 

[dewasrite]

I am in New York State, and over 18, since that does actually matter here. I tried to ctb but have a stupid hang up about being inconsiderate, so I canceled my appointments for the month but didn't know how to cancel the rest (I had a once every other week ongoing appt time) so my dumbass actually messaged my therapist saying that I wanted to cancel but didn't know how and that I may be suicidal but I am not rude. I know how stupid that is. Since she is a mandated reporter she did call the police and crisis services. They came to my home for a welfare check and despite the fact that I was very bitchy and combative, I was not made to go anywhere. I had the choice to go to the hospital but I "explained" that it wasn't a serious attempt (it was), I was just off my medication and reacting poorly. They linked me with a medication provider and set up an appointment for me but I did not have to be hospitalized. I feel like most therapists can tell the difference between a "real" attempt (danger to yourself kinda stuff) and feeling suicidal. The therapist and I did talk about it pretty frankly, so that was actually helpful. I specifically remember my therapist telling me after all of that happened that it is okay if my goal is simply to NOT have ctb be my back up plan for EVERYTHING. Not gonna lie, I would love that.

 

[MyLifeisHell]

sounds counter intuitive , if someone is doing therapy it means they r actually trying to get better. reporting them will only result in them giving up on recovering all together.
I feel like a therapist job isn't rly to stop u from harming urself , rather help u find hope. after all that's all we r looking for , the tinniest ray of hope

At the end of the day therapists will prioritize themselves. A client's suicide could cause them a lot of trouble so if there is a clear risk of that they will report it even if it destroys the "therapeutic alliance" or ends up being a net harmful experience for that person's recovery, as long as they are not subject to any liability.

 

[yousaidimsweet]

almost everybody in my life at some point has told me to get therapy, and now that i have a good amount of money to pay for it, i think i will. but i'm worried it's not going to do anything for me, i've already pretty much decided i wanted to ctb sometime soon but i'm really sick of being miserable every day, so, therapy it is. anyways, i'm wondering if anybody here has talked to a therapist about suicide/self harm. i've read online that they contact police/ems, family members, etc when you say that you're going to/have been harming yourself. has anyone actually experienced that? i want to discuss my tendencies with an expert but im worried they'll call somebody on me.

sorry if this is a dumb question/posted in the wrong place, this is my first post

in my experience, i was getting therapy through my uni, so my therapists were obtaining clinical hours to eventually get their license. i did discuss with my therapist that i frequently had SI and in the past would self-harm, and he told me that as long as i do not have an actual plan (method, date, etc) that i was in the clear from being 5150'ed. of course i never told him about this site.

 

[Deer_Dairy]

almost everybody in my life at some point has told me to get therapy, and now that i have a good amount of money to pay for it, i think i will. but i'm worried it's not going to do anything for me, i've already pretty much decided i wanted to ctb sometime soon but i'm really sick of being miserable every day, so, therapy it is. anyways, i'm wondering if anybody here has talked to a therapist about suicide/self harm. i've read online that they contact police/ems, family members, etc when you say that you're going to/have been harming yourself. has anyone actually experienced that? i want to discuss my tendencies with an expert but im worried they'll call somebody on me.

sorry if this is a dumb question/posted in the wrong place, this is my first post

Not dumb at all! This is safe space, no one will judge you.

To your question - I do not know in which coutry you live. In my country it is like if therapist have real concern that you will severly harm yourself in next hours/days he/she has to call the emergency medical help.
DIscussion about tendencies is ok, it is a part of disease, depression I mean. So it is completely ok to talk about it.
Look at it same as telling the physician that you have temperature while you have flu.

 

[fadedghost]

A therapist has the power to tell police you're a danger to yourself and others and need to be committed. They can do this without violating confidentiality because technically, expressing their judgement that you're dangerous and need to be locked up is not confidential because they aren't disclosing what you've told them specifically. Once you are locked up, an independent team of people would hold or for a period of time and then at a certain point they may or may not let you out. Financial realities usually mean that they let you out when insurance runs out, since they may not get paid beyond that. Your therapist is also put into a risky position in terms of liability. If someone says "yep I'm going to die on X day" and the therapist is like "that's nice. gosh, i'm hungry, i need to get some mcdonald's food" and just end the session and does nothing, they could get sued.

the reality is vague general statements about suicide (ie "i feel suicidal") may not result in hospitalization because therapists don't want to lose the client, so they weigh possible liability versus losing income and usually unless it's imminent they don't care. However, if you said "my method is X, I'm going to die on X date, which is soon, and I know I'm going to do it" they will get police and an ambulance to take you away. It's hard to know when exactly that will happen, at one point they will demand in-patient care. It's really a gamble because they can demand in-patient care at any time if you discuss being suicidal.

 

[BullsDon'tFly]

At least in my case, YES!!!!!!!!!!!

One time when I caught my now ex-cheating, I called and talked a few minutes. The next thing I knew, the cop dispatcher called my cell phone and told me to unlock my door and come out. I asked what?

Unlocked and opened the door and cops rushed in and grabbed me and hauled me off to the psychic ward.

Found out later that a receptionist was told to "call the cops" on me.

So, at least in my case, a 100% YES!!!!

Walter

I am in the U.S. if that matters.

Sorry for the question but did you talk to your private therapist or to an hotline?

almost everybody in my life at some point has told me to get therapy, and now that i have a good amount of money to pay for it, i think i will. but i'm worried it's not going to do anything for me, i've already pretty much decided i wanted to ctb sometime soon but i'm really sick of being miserable every day, so, therapy it is. anyways, i'm wondering if anybody here has talked to a therapist about suicide/self harm. i've read online that they contact police/ems, family members, etc when you say that you're going to/have been harming yourself. has anyone actually experienced that? i want to discuss my tendencies with an expert but im worried they'll call somebody on me.

sorry if this is a dumb question/posted in the wrong place, this is my first post

First time I was really planning to CTB (before now) my therapist got in touch with the psychiatrist that was already following me. She didn't call for an intervention, but I don't remember exactly what I've said during those meetings, probably that I was thinking about CTB but without stating I had a date, method, etc.
I got hospitalized anyway because my family discovered the equipment, my therapist was getting updates about my condition, she was very kind and thoughtful. If I remember correctly, when I returned meeting her she said something like "OK let's work to not make it happen again", so now I'm trying to not mention my ideation, since I have some history and that could also play a role in her deciding to call for an intervention or not... But I guess that without some previous attempts, therapists usually don't resort to immediate hospitalization unless they can see a real plan over the simple ideation.